MMQB Review: Time to Quit Ignoring the Lockout Edition

It is officially the NFL offseason and now since Peter King doesn't have to focus on those pesky football games, he can finally talk about what is really bothering him, like hotels, rental cars, and humans who dare to walk in the space that occupies as well. His title to this MMQB puts offseason in quotations like there isn't an NFL offseason, yet most of this MMQB involves his personal thoughts and very little NFL news that he has to tell his readers. Not to mention MMQB is shorter this week than it is during the season. So I think it is fair to say while the NFL doesn't shut down during the months of February to April and then shut down again from May to June, there isn't that much going on right now really. Of course when you are a rambling man like Peter, there is always something going on.

LOS ANGELES -- Yes, Los Angeles. Out here for a little R&R and hockey;

Yes, because after an entire season of bitching and moaning about traveling all the time and how life on the road takes a toll on a person, obviously immediately taking another trip when the Super Bowl ends makes sense.

I also enjoy the fact Peter has "offseason" in quotations in the title of this MMQB like he is still working hard, but the first sentence reveals he is on a semi-vacation. Where would I be in this world without Peter's tiny little contradictions?

Anyway, this morning I'll try to be the methadone for your withdrawal from the NFL season.

Normally Peter is my cocaine during the season, so him being my methadone is a nice change. Usually I end up snorting a few of Peter's words and up angry because I think he is lying or ranting and raving about something until I want to go rob a convenience store.

The week after always comes with a real thud, doesn't it?

My NFL season has been over since the beginning of January. I have just stuck around to make sure Brett Favre didn't win a Super Bowl.

Much on my mind this morning: The Saints still celebrating as they march into a headachy offseason, Peyton Manning ruining his life, the NFL's strange looming offseason, Conrad Dobler trying to make the NFL and the union do the right thing, and why you need to let major decisions percolate for a while before making them at an unemotional time on the NFL calendar. Oh, and a Hall of Fame nugget or two.

It's funny, out of all those things Peter is going to talk about, he forgot to mention one other thing he is going to discuss this week...Brett Favre. Yes, I don't want to ruin it for you, but the streak continues...or in other words, Peter King also talks about Brett Favre this week. I hope the fact he does this isn't too shocking to anyone.

As of this morning, we're 580 days away from Opening Day 2011 -- the first day there will be no football if the owners lock out the players. There are going to be 580 twists and turns of the story between now and then.

I get it! Every day there will be a new twist and turn in the story of the NFL lockout! How creative of Peter. By the way Apolo Ohno is overrated. I can't believe he could only get a silver medal in the 1500 meter speedskating event. Hell, J.R. Celski had a huge gash in his left leg a few months ago and could get a bronze. Silver...how meager.

(Great idea Fred! Why not be a 15 year old and pick fights? Hey look, I am also like Peter King and leaving messages for people in my columns/posts!)

Still, I believe there will be a work stoppage in 2011. The fact is, owners want players to bear some burden for the costs of all the stadiums that have been built in recent years, and players don't want to pay for something they've never paid for before. That's the elephant in the negotiating room right now, and no one's budging.

I am going to have to start paying attention to this looming lockout I am afraid. Last night, I heard Charles Barkley and David Stern talking about an NBA lockout before the NBA All-Star Game. Pretty soon, Major League Baseball is going to look like a well-run league before this is all said and done. I know there is money involved and all of that crap, but there is no long term positive thing to come out of a lockout.

If the NBA has a lockout, I think that would be an even bigger mistake than the NFL. There are great players in their prime who would miss time playing, great players on the sunset of their career who will miss time playing and great young players who would miss time playing. It's stupid.

As far as the NFL goes, I can't exactly understand completely how the owners want the players to help pay for some of the stadium costs since many of the NFL stadiums were built with tax payers money. The owners OWN the team and therefore the facility the team plays in is part of his/her business. Having a stadium, whether mostly private or publicly funded is part of owning a team. My employer doesn't make me pay for the building I work in, so why should the players have to help pay for stadium costs? I think I need more information on this issue.

I think the NFL would budge significantly from its goal of getting the players to exempt $1 billion a year from the money the two sides currently share. But if the players don't conceptually accept that they should share in the cost of building a bigger revenue base for the first time in NFL labor history, we're about to be subjected to a long and frustrating period of vein-bulging rhetoric.

I love the NFL. It is my favorite sport. I will watch the NFL when/if they come back from lockout, but I see no reason a lockout is going to do any good long term. I can watch baseball and college football all Fall and then watch college basketball and the NBA (if they don't have a lockout). I won't like it, but there are other things I can watch. They better not kill the goose that lay the golden egg. Ask the NHL, NBA, and MLB...the public isn't too forgiving of lockouts.

The Saints will have the toughest road to repeat that we've ever seen in the NFL -- and they wouldn't trade it for the world.

I would love to hear how the Saints are going to have the toughest road to repeat. I wonder if it will be tough because they don't get to play the Lions this year?

The logical question for the Saints: Is all this celebrating and spate of parades -- the Saints' Super Bowl parade was so big that it was shown live on CNN with Wolf Blitzer throwing to reporters in the middle of his "Situation Room'' show -- going to go on so long that they affect the Saints' ability to repeat in 2010?

Yes. This doesn't make the Saints any more different than any other team that has won a Super Bowl. It's their responsibility to make sure they don't lose focus on building for next year as well. This is Saints ownership and player's responsibilities to make sure does not happen and I won't give them sympathy or say the road to the Super Bowl next year is harder because they made it harder on themselves. Other teams deal with this crap after they win a Super Bowl, so the Saints should be able to as well.

Teams in the Super Bowl are so far behind the preparation 8-ball already, finishing the season five weeks after the 22 non-playoff teams.

So I guess the excuses for the Saints not repeating are already being prepared.

Players and coaches in this business say endlessly, like a mantra, that they're in this business to win a Super Bowl, and all our energy is focused on that. If five days after winning they say, OK, we've drawn a line in the sand, and we won't have any more talking about winning the Super Bowl. I mean, only an android would do that.

No one is saying the Saints shouldn't celebrate, but Peter King is the one who brought up the damn topic of whether they can be focused enough or not next year...and now he is arguing against his own point.

Until I see Payton with the lampshade on his head during a May minicamp, I say laissez les bon temps roullez. Let the good times roll.

Great. I am glad we wasted space with Peter arguing with himself on this issue.

"One of the officers had a great idea I'm going to be bringing up to Mr. Benson. There are 64 parishes in Louisiana. Since this is the state's team -- the Superdome was built by the state originally, not by the city -- this officer suggested we take it to all 64 parishes in the state.

So back to the lockout. Tom Benson owns the Saints, he didn't pay for the stadium the team he owns plays in, but he wants the players to help pay for the cost of the stadium where the team he owns plays? So while the taxpayers pay for the building of the stadium and have to pay money for tickets and concessions, the owners want the players to help pay for the expense of running the owner's business? How does this sound fair?

And Payton told me last Sunday night he'd consider doing something like the NHL does with the Stanley Cup, and allow his players to take it for a day.

Out of the 53 players on the active roster, I bet 35 of them take the Lombardi Trophy to a strip club. I would even bet Jeremy Shockey finds a way to take bong hits out of it. Giving the Lombardi Trophy to players for a day sounds like a bad idea to me.

The Saints have 29 restricted or unrestricted free agents,

The Saints are the only team in the NFL with unrestricted free agents after that team wins the Super Bowl. I bet no one knew that. It is going to be so tough to repeat!

Unrestricted free-agents (2): FS Darren Sharper, LB Scott Fujita.

Restricted free-agents (5): T Jammal Brown (an asterisk there because the starting Pro Bowl left tackle was hurt and gave way to an oft-shaky Jermon Bushrod), T Jermon Bushrod, G Jahri Evans, RB Pierre Thomas, SS Roman Harper.

There are some pretty good players on that list, I will admit that, plus Reggie Bush is going to want to be overpaid again this year. I am pretty sure he won't take a pay cut. Kim Kardashian doesn't pay for herself (ok, well maybe she does). Let's see how the Saints do when they try to do some salary cap management. It is one thing to get this strong team together, now let's see what happens when there have to be decisions made. A three-headed running back attack sounds great until all 3 want to get paid.

There's also versatile motion tackle Zach Strief (remember that mountainous guy you saw in motion 50 times in the playoffs for the Saints?)

He is the guy Gregg Easterbrook only saw in motion in the Super Bowl...but yes Peter is right on this issue and Gregg Easterbrook is an idiot.

The other question is whether they'll allow Reggie Bush to walk in trade.

Haha. The question I have is what a team is willing to trade to get Bush. He is an explosive player but he isn't a great (in terms of rushing with the football) running back and that's the position he plays. He can catch the ball though, so there is some value there.

No question there will be some interest out there, particularly by Seattle, with former USC coach Pete Carroll there, but my hunch is that Payton, who likes Bush more than most football people do because of the change-of-pace he provides for the offense, will figure Bush, at 24, will continue to make enough plays to justify his $8 million salary in 2010. I think the Saints will keep him.

I am sorry, I can't fathom spending $8 million dollars on a guy who has averaged 37 yards rushing and 37 yards receiving over his career...and his numbers are trending downward when it comes to yards per game. I don't know the Saints salary cap situation but I would think an $8 million running back is a luxury, especially when Pierre Thomas is a better pure running back. the change of pace Bush gives a team in terms of rushing is that he isn't as great at it compared to a starting running back.

The same way it was absurd to suggest Manning would be the greatest quarterback ever if he had won this year's Super Bowl (which would have given Manning two titles in 12 years, with none of the all-time records his), it's just as absurd to call him some tragically flawed player because he threw a bad interception going in for the tying touchdown late in the fourth quarter.

I agree to an extent. It is weird how Manning couldn't beat the University of Florida and has lost some big NFL games, but I have defended Manning before and I will do it again. It is weird he seems to lose big games though.

Oh, and this is the part where Peter King defends his good friend Peyton Manning.

I'm annoyed enough as it is that most people who analyze football make playoff football the only thing that counts when considering the greatness of players. I loved the Tweet of Aaron Schatz of FootballOutsiders.com Sunday: "How come no one ever mentions Jim Brown was 1-3 in the playoffs and averaged 3.7 YPC (yards per carry) when they talk about his legacy?''

I don't know how many posts I have talked about this, but I completely agree. John Clayton based his ignorant-ass all-time quarterback rankings completely on the postseason. It's madness.

Manning is 70 games over .500 in 12 seasons, which is better than Dan Marino, John Elway, Johnny Unitas, Bart Starr, Terry Bradshaw and Roger Staubach were in their careers. But Manning's 9-9 playoff record overshadows all of that. I'm not saying the 9-9 shouldn't be considered. I just think it shouldn't overshadow everything.

Completely agreed. Now let's watch Peter King rank players using the postseason. No really, he does this.

I've shouted from the rooftops in the past month that the NFL is 90, not 19, and we need to remember Otto Graham won seven championships in 10 pro seasons,

So from a guy who doesn't want playoff records to be considered when evaluating Peyton Manning, he starts listing other quarterback's playoff records and rating those quarterbacks based on that. Brilliant!

A generation ago, Montana was Tiger Woods. Four Super Bowl wins in the '80s, 16 playoff wins in all ... the ultimate winner. And now he's yesterday's news. Not in my history book.

Yet again, after asking that people consider Manning's other accomplishments, Peter King goes on to list another quarterback as great by talking about how many playoff victories he had. I believe Montana is the best quarterback of all-time, but if Peter King tries to make a point that playoff victories shouldn't solely be used to rank quarterbacks, he may want to refrain from using playoff victories and championships to rank who he thinks are the best quarterbacks.

Then Peter makes a list of the best quarterbacks in the history of the NFL and their records in the postseason and Manning has the 14th best record, which makes Manning look even worse. It is like Peter is trying to undercut his own point.

I would suggest that they start by looking at the knees of Dobler, a guard for the Cardinals, Saints and Bills, who made three Pro Bowls and earned $450,000 in 10 seasons, ending in 1981. His knees are more road maps than functioning joints, part of the 34-surgery nightmare he endured to be a football player.

I think my favorite part about Peter King is how he likes to ignore things he doesn't like about his favorite players. For example, Peter King's current 2nd favorite quarterback (behind Favre, he is obviously Peter's favorite), Drew Brees said this about retired players and Conrad Dobler has a beef with him about it:

"There's some guys out there that have made bad business decisions," Brees told USA Today last January. "They took their pensions early because they never went out and got a job. They've had a couple divorces. And that's why they don't have money. And they're coming to us to basically say, 'Please make up for my bad judgement.'"

Peter King is for today's player's helping out the retired ex-NFL players and he talks about Conrad Dobler advocating for this, but Peter completely fails to mention the attitude players like Brees have towards Dobler because Peter doesn't want to say anything negative about Brees. That is how it comes off to me and this is why I think Peter King does PR for his favorite players. Dobler has been the most critical of Brees, yet when Peter King mentions retired players and pensions, he never mentions Brees. Wouldn't you think since Dobler has called Brees name out specifically for this several times, Peter would mention Brees is the exact type of person who has a bad attitude towards retired players? But no, he turns into Peter King, PR guy for NFL quarterbacks.

Want to know the fate of Favre? Wait a while.

No, I don't care about Brett Favre. We didn't think Peter could go a whole week without mentioning Favre did we?

A year ago, Brett Favre retired from the New York Jets. The night he retired, I spoke with him, and he said he wouldn't change his mind because of how tough that would be on Jets GM Mike Tannenbaum, who went out on a limb to acquire him and didn't do it with only one year in mind.

Liar.

"We'll see. I foresee getting the impulse to play. But as good as Mike Tannenbaum has been to me, I could never bring myself to do it. I know I won't do it. If I did, I'd be putting the Jets in a tough spot, because I know they can't release me.''

Liar.

He told Ed Werder the night of the playoff loss to the Saints he almost certainly wouldn't play, and now I'm hearing it's highly likely he will. But until Brad Childress sets a drop-dead date for Favre to tell him if he's playing -- and means it -- all of this is meaningless. I can tell you from bitter experience that Favre is going to change his mind a lot between now and whenever that date is.

Brett Favre is going to play in the NFL next year. He is just waiting for a while longer so the media can focus on him some more and he gets the attention. That's what it is all about. Attention. It's something Favre craves and writers like Peter King waste my time and his reader's time by trying to guess what this natural born liar is going to do. Who cares? He lied the last two years, no one is getting the truth out of him, just wait for him to make a desperate move to get publicity and follow the story then. At this point, there hasn't been enough attention on Favre so he won't say what he is doing. Besides, no matter if he says he is retiring, he is lying. He is coming back. Can we go one week without mentioning this attention seeking guy?

"There is no hangover, there is no carryover, it's a brand new season. We are well on our way to dealing with 2010.''
-- Indianapolis president Bill Polian on Friday, five days after the nightmare Super Bowl loss that he refused to discuss with local reporters.

Bill Polian also added that he is going to talk to the Competition Committee to see if he could make the onside kick illegal, ban interceptions, and say Peyton Manning never has to play against a defense that tries to blitz him. Also, the Super Bowl loser should get the #1 pick in the draft and a player of their choice from the Super Bowl winning team.

It would be unfair, dirty, and underhanded if this all didn't happen. It would be dirty pool.

Sometimes you see a scene that is so car-wreckish you wish you could intercede, but you don't because it's none of your business.

So instead of interceding at the time, you talk about the incident publicly in a forum like, I don't know a national column that thousands of people read. It is much more your business to do that, rather than interceding and not broadcasting what happened to thousands.

Hertz car rental counter, 12:15 a.m. Saturday, Los Angeles International Airport. There must be 75 people here, in line, waiting for cars both at the Gold counter and the regular counter, and in a situation like this, as tired as you are, there's nothing you can do. Get in line, hold it together, hope it's not an hour before you get your car, like it appears it will be, and just deal.

Except one woman just couldn't. Her husband was near the front of the line, and obviously he'd been in line for a while, and the wife waited outside with two young children. About every five minutes, she'd come in, glare at her husband and say something like:

"No car yet? What is taking you so long!''

And my personal favorite, with the two kids in tow: "I am soooooo tired! Can't you see how tired I am? Do something! Say something to them!''

These people had probably paid for the rental car out of their own pocket and then gone to a hotel where they weren't getting reimbursed for their meals and travel expenses, so the waiting was probably a huge frustration to them. Peter shouldn't be shocked since this couple had probably had kids who were complaining and cranky. Of course Peter was just shocked there were other travelers who had aggravating travel problems. He thought he was the only one.

I caught the eye of a guy behind me in line, and our looks said: "Thank God we won't be in that rental car tonight.''

That's what Peter's eyes said. The guy behind Peter in line was actually think, "Holy shit, there is that ass-hat Peter King. My God, that is a huge Brett Favre Fathead he has. It doesn't even fit in his suitcase."

2. I think I'm still waiting for the league to fine Bryant McKinnie for going on strike during Pro Bowl week and simply not showing up to practice. Where is the spine of the league? Fine the man. Heavily.

I am little torn on this issue. He got voted into the Pro Bowl, so it's a honor to him. He should show up to practice but if players are going to be fined for missing practice while they are celebrating an honor they get, why would any player even show up? That player should just skip it next year and don't worry about it. It sucks a little bit of the fun out of it if the NFL takes the Pro Bowl away from Hawaii and treats it like it actually means something by fining players for missing practice.

Maybe he was on a "party boat" and had to miss practice.

3. I think the four GM-types I talked to last week had no answer to how anyone will structure a contract that gets free-agent defensive end Julius Peppers signed. There's not only the part about paying him what he thinks he's worth -- in excess of $15-million a year, which won't happen -- but also the part about giving a 30-year-old player lots of guaranteed money and then having the 2011 season disrupted or ruined with a job action.

Of course it doesn't stop Peppers and his completely incompetent agent, Carl Carey, from bitching in public the Panthers have ignored him. How fucked up in the head is Peppers? He told a Charlotte radio station last week that the Panthers offered to make him the highest paid defensive player in the NFL "by a little bit" in 2007, coming off a 2.5 sack season and he turned it down because he didn't think they were sincere about it. Sincere about it? It's money, money has no conscience or feeling. Plus, he said he didn't think he deserved the contract so wouldn't have accepted it anyway.

Then of course he thinks the world should give him sympathy after he turned down another long term deal after the 2008 season and stated he didn't want to play for the Panthers anymore...and gave the team a list of 4 teams he wanted to be traded to. Three of those teams were in the NFC and reportedly two of them were in the NFC South. None of those teams, absent New England, had the smallest interest in him and his trade value was ruined by his contract demands and clear unhappiness in Carolina. So he got franchised and took up a lot of salary cap room. Peppers is a good example of a player whose agent has royally fucked his free agent years. Twice he could have signed a long-term contract and has turned it down. He's now 30, has a bad reputation and wants more money than teams are willing to pay.

5. I think Chester Taylor's the hidden skill-position gem of the unrestricted free-agent crop. He's 30, but a lightly used 30-year-old back who could be a solid co-number one for a team like San Diego, Washington or Detroit.

Is he lightly used because he has backed up good running backs or is he lightly used because he can't be that co-number one? That's my question. I think he can be a co-number one, but any team with a brain will ask that question about a 30 year old running back.

8. I think I'm just like everyone else who follows this game: I wonder who will employ LaDainian Tomlinson in 2010. I have a strong feeling Mike Shanahan will look at some San Diego tape, but my guess is L.T. will be too old for the 'Skins.

Given their history of trying to sign older running backs, I have my money on the Houston Texans.

9. I think it's 66 days 'til the first round of the draft, and my money's on Ndamukong Suh wearing Ram blue and gold with the first pick.

I love Ndamukong Suh. I L-O-V-E him, but there has been so much hype about him, I just can't help but think he will disappoint everyone a little. I have heard that Gerald McCoy isn't that far behind Suh in the minds of some scouts, but I have to say, if there is no quarterback available to the Rams he would be a great choice.

a. I forgot to mention I rented a Prius out here over the weekend. What a nice car. Exceedingly quiet, and I don't notice the slow acceleration. Neat dashboard too.

Other than that whole "the gas pedal sticks so you may kill someone else or perhaps yourself by running into a human or unmovable barrier of some sort" the Prius does sound nice. Plus you can be douchetastic and have the car show you on the dashboard how you are helping the environment while you drive.

"Good for you!"
"Thanks!"

f. Where would "The Office'' be without the Nard Dog? What an acquisition.

Yes, Ed Helms was a great get at the time because before he was on "The Office" Ed Helms was busy doing many other important acting things like..............being on "The Daily Show."

g. Every time I hear about the decline of newspapers, I read an incredible piece, like this one about the drug problem along the Mexico-U.S. border, and I think there's no way papers can die. Check out the great story by Dan Barry of the New York Times.

It was a great story, but an online newspaper could do the same story about the drug problem as well. It is unfortunate but true.

It is going to be a long Favre-watching and lockout-discussing offseason. Fortunately, Peter King will here to bitch about trivial things the entire time, so we will stay amused.