Peter King Describes How Tormented Brett Favre Is

Peter King's mailbags are typically tame affairs where he bores us with something he wanted to talk about in MMQB, but didn't have the space to do so, or Peter comments on something that happened the night before in the Monday Night Football game. Then he takes a few mailbag questions, blushes when someone writes in saying how great he is, and calls it a day. But, nothing is ever tame when Peter discusses Brett Favre and with Favre under investigation by the league Peter wants us to know that Brett is hurting too.

The Packers enter a brutal stretch of games -- Miami, Minnesota, at Jets, Dallas --

Combined record in 2010: 8-9.

On paper and in Peter's head, I guess this does look like a brutal slate of games, but so far this year the reality is a little bit different. It has the potential to be a tough stretch of games, but these four teams are also under .500 for the year. These are still good teams, so anything can happen (God, I sound like Joe Morgan).

with a concussed quarterback, their best pass-rusher with a hamstring injury, a rookie left tackle, a running game with major question marks, both top tight ends out for at least three weeks with injuries, and ... isn't that enough?

Let's hold off on feeling bad for the Packers. The fact they have a rookie left tackle and major questions in their running game is completely their fault. They could have found a way to improve the running game through a trade and did not do it. The injuries, there's not much they could do about that. That's been tough for them. It's probably part of the reason the team has struggled in some facets of offense and defense, contrary to what Gregg Easterbrook says.

Aaron Rodgers needs to man up and get over this little "concussion" he has. Brett Favre isn't a pussy like Aaron Rodgers and would play with a concussion and tell us all about how he couldn't see the field very well, but he just wanted to play well for his teammates. Then Favre would remind everyone again he played while suffering a concussion the week before and Gregg Easterbrook would bemoan that Favre blatantly ignores head safety issues. Aaron Rodgers has a lot to live up to.

Coach Mike McCarthy said it's possible Rodgers will miss practice this week and possibly the game Sunday against the Dolphins. That would give 2008 seventh-round pick Matt Flynn his first NFL start, and it would come against a healing Dolphins team with a good pass-rush, coming off its bye.

Flynn has been in the Packer's system for over two years now and is the backup quarterback. If he can't get the job done after two years in the system, then he shouldn't be the backup quarterback. Sympathy denied.

(I loved Flynn at LSU. I don't doubt he would do a good job if he had to in an NFL game. He's not the most physically talented guy, but he is smart and seemed to run the LSU offense very effectively.)

The passing game was already in dry dock anyway; the man who is supposed to be Rodgers' favorite target, Greg Jennings, has nine catches in the last four games, and he seems peeved about it.

The problem discussed above by Peter is that both tight ends for the Packers are out three weeks and now Peter mentions Greg Jennings wants more touches. In this problem, lies the solution...with the two tight ends out, Jennings can be featured more. Problem solved and you're welcome.

Lucky for the Packers they've got three of the next four at home. There's not much other good news on the horizon for them.

Other than they are playing the next three out of four games at home against three teams that aren't above .500, have a franchise quarterback on their side, and they are still a good team.

JENN STERGER'S FEELING TORMENTED. I spoke to her manager, Phil Reese, last night, and he said all options are still being considered regarding whether the former Jets sideline hostess is going to cooperate with the league's investigation into the Brett Favre case.

(Peter King calling Phil Reese) "Hey Phil, it's Peter King with NBC, Sports Illustrated, Brett Favre's Fan Club and the Citizens Against the Marriott. What's up buddy?"

(Phil Reese) "Peter, we don't know what we are doing yet. Please quit calling me 20 times a day. Also, I said I don't like coffee. Quit offering me coupons for coffee."

(Peter King) "But Starbucks' Strawberry Soy Latte with Chocolate Flavored sprinkles is heavenly. I pay $6 a pop for those bad boys. In regard to the 'situation,' really Phil, I think this could all blow over (whispers something to Brett Favre in the background) at some point. What's Jenn gonna do? Is she leaning one way or another"

(Phil Reese) "I will say again, we don't know, and even if he we did know we would not tell you at this point."

(Peter King) "Phil! Come on man. What can I do for you? You like to run? I can hook you up with the guy who came in 15th in the Boston Marathon in 1976. He will run with you AND THEN COMPLIMENT YOU ON YOUR ATHLETIC PROWESS AS YOU DRINK COFFEE TOGETHER! Sounds like fun, no?"

(Phil Reese) "Not really. I like to run alone. Anything else I can do for you? You are tormenting us."

(Peter King writes down that Jenn Sterger is tormented) "You can tell me what you are going to do. It's not like I will tell Brett (winks knowingly at Brett Favre and urges him not to send the cock-shot he just took and planned on sending to a Vikings sideline reporter) or anything. I barely talk to him anymore. I am a journalist first and foremost."

(Phil Reese) "You called me at my office. My phone caller ID says 'Brett Favre, Hattiesburg, Mississippi.' I know you are in Favre's house right now, calling me."

(Peter King forgot about that) "Umm...I have to go. Trent Green is texting me."

The best resolution for the Vikings and Favre is going to be the best for Sterger too -- that the league's investigation goes quickly so all involved can get on with their lives, whatever the decision is.

Can't we just make this all go away so we can focus less on the negative stuff Brett Favre has done, to focus more how he plays the game like a kid and whether his elbow is really affecting his play at this point? It's just Brett allegedly sexually harassing someone. Who hasn't sent cock-shots to a fellow employee after that employee has repeatedly turned down a sexual encounter with you?

Will the league's investigation end if Sterger doesn't cooperate? Not necessarily, because if the league can prove that Favre sent the incriminating photos -- perhaps with any information they can glean from an interview with Deadspin.com editor A.J. Daulerio -- commissioner Roger Goodell will still be able to act.

(Peter King calling Roger Goodell's office and talking in a high pitched voice) "Hey, it's Jenn Sterger here. Nothing happened. Those rats at Deadspin are liars. Brett was always a gentleman to me. We had no sex and nothing else inappropriate happened. You can end the investigation now. Thanks. Bye."

(Roger Goodell) "Peter King. Is that you again? Give it up. We have caller ID and know you are calling from Brett Favre's house again."

(Peter King slamming the phone down and screaming down the hall) "Brett, I think they fell for it."

BRETT FAVRE LOOKS TORMENTED.

Brett Favre is tormented? Peter thinks we need to feel sympathy for Favre?

Oh, poor Brett Favre. That WHORE Jenn Sterger (allegedly) turned down his sexual advances, forcing him to use up valuable text messages to text her a picture of his penis. Then that SLUT ignores him, giving him a mad case of blue balls and Brett has to waste daytime minutes trying to get her attention. Finally after that $ 3 DOLLAR TRAMP ignores him again he hurts his elbow pleasuring himself repeatedly. Now Brett has a hurt arm, all because Jenn Sterger didn't want to have sex with him and wouldn't even acknowledge his cock-shots. So the Vikings year is going down the shitter with Brett Favre's legacy and it is all Jenn Sterger's fault. Brett is so tormented right now over this. His elbow hurts, his wife is pissed off at him and all because some little BITCH had to go and act like every woman in the world doesn't secretly want to fuck Brett Favre. When will this tormenting of Favre end? It's all about Brett Favre and how this affects him. If Brett has to end his consecutive starts streak, then the tears at the retirement press conference are on you Jenn Sterger. On your conscience and where the very empty pit that would normally house a soul resides. I hope you feel good about Brett's tears, tattle-tale.

It's hard to know whether Favre's painfully slow start in the 29-20 loss to the Jets was due to his bum elbow, the Jets' pressure defense, the Vikings' inability to consistently execute their blitz-pickup, or the challenges of playing with the league's investigation of his 2008 experience with Sterger.

But either way it is all about Brett Favre. He's tormented over something, we just have to figure out what. The one possible thought that he may not be playing the position of quarterback very well so far this year is just so ludicrous we won't even mention it. Any possible reason he is not playing well is out of the current control of Favre. It's all about him.

What? There was a school shooting in Minnesota and 36 people died? HOW DOES THIS AFFECT BRETT FAVRE? THOSE ROADS NEAR THE SCHOOL BETTER NOT BE ROAD-BLOCKED BECAUSE HE PROMISED BRELEIGH CHUCK-E-CHEESE FOR DINNER!

But reading his body language, he wasn't happy that kicker and good friend Ryan Longwell spilled to Michele Tafoya that he apologized to his teammates Monday morning, emotionally, for the Sterger distraction.

Everyone in the world should run anything they have to say about Brett Favre by Brett Favre first. Brett can call out players through the media that hold out of training camp and he can keep his teammates waiting until nearly August to find out if he is playing for the Vikings this year, but don't you dare speak something publicly about him without his written permission.

If anyone is going to use the media to try and gain sympathy for Favre during this tough time it is Brett Favre himself. He was going to tell the media he cried in the locker room in due time. Jesus, Ryan Longwell is such a media manipulation rookie. Brett worked up the energy to cry and was going to bring it out the appropriate time so the media could write how sincere he is and then Longwell goes and fucks this up. Why can't people just be more respectful of Brett Favre?

So he was ticked off about that, and certainly about the Sterger distraction, and we haven't even gotten to the pain in his throwing elbow that won't go away.

If Favre has such terrible pain in his elbow and can't play effectively, then perhaps he should bench himself so the team doesn't get negatively affected. Wait, that can't happen because Brett Favre doesn't give a shit about the team, he cares about everyone knowing he is trying to play really, really hard with an ouchie on his elbow. Plus, Favre isn't ruining his consecutive starts streak just because he is becoming a liability due to the injury.

The Vikings are 1-3, facing a vital game Sunday against the Cowboys. And you've got to think Favre walked out of the stadium in New Jersey last night with this going through his head: I wish I never came back this year.

Peter King seems to be actively soliciting sympathy for Brett Favre right now. He is portraying Favre as tortured, injured and regretting his decision to come back this year. Too bad. Favre made the decision to come back and now he has to live with it.

Peter doesn't have to portray Favre in a negative light because Favre hasn't been actually proven to be guilty of something, but to use the words "tormented" when talking about Favre and attempting to elicit sympathy for Favre by constantly talking about his sore elbow, like other NFL quarterbacks have never played through an injury is a bit much.

New Orleans, though five games last year, scored 192 points. In the 3-2 start this year, the Saints have scored 97. It's amazing that the absence of Reggie Bush -- out until November with a broken fibula -- has meant so much.

Because Reggie Bush would have scored the 13.5 touchdowns (in only three full games he has missed) required to make up the difference in scoring for the Saints from 2009 as compared to 2010. I don't think Bush's absence has meant THAT much to the Saints, but apparently Peter King disagrees.

Without Bush being able to stress the defense by attracting an extra linebacker or safety in coverage -- especially when he forces foes to change positions by motioning before the snap -- the Saints are missing the change-up pitcher that made their offense so explosive.

Peter is full of excuses today. So basically Peter is trying to tell me that Drew Brees' success as a quarterback depends on Reggie Bush's ability to be on the field. I don't believe this. I am sure Bush's absence does have an effect on the Saints, but Peter can't expect the Saints to go through the season with zero injuries to important players. Injuries happen and good teams/coaches adjust to these injuries. If Sean Payton is such an offensive genius he could figure out a way to score without Bush.

I THINK I KNOW WHAT'S WRONG WITH THE COWBOYS. It's the run-pass ratio. This is a team that spent the offseason touting its three-pronged run game, with good reason. Through the 1-3 start, none blowouts, Dallas is running the ball on 33.6 percent of the offensive snaps. That's ridiculous.

That number is ridiculous, but let's remember Dallas has been behind at halftime of every single game this year, except against the Texans. So while the 33.6% number is low, the Cowboys have been having to play a game of catch-up in many of their games.

Felix Jones has touched the ball 45 times in four games. What is wrong with this picture?

Jones has gotten 11 touches per game. That's not terribly much lower than the 15 touches per game he should be getting...especially with Peter advocating the other two running backs get a lot of touches as well.

Starting Sunday in Minnesota, the Cowboys have to start giving Jones, Marion Barber and Tashard Choice the chance to possess the ball and rule games.

If only the Cowboys had thought of this themselves.

DIFFERENT STORIES, I THINK. "You have a great column but you missed the boat in one regard this week. You commended Raiders Tyvon Branch for returning a fumble for a touchdown against the Chargers. However, did he really make the proper play? Branch recovered the ball with a little over one minute left in the game, at the Oakland 36-yard line, when San Diego had 2 timeouts left. The TD put the Raiders up 8. If Branch had simply fallen to the ground after recovering the ball (and avoided the possibility of fumbling, a risk that only a few sentences later in your column you chastised Rodgers-Cromartie for taking), the Raiders could have whittled the clock down to maybe 10 seconds left and punted to the Chargers, who in all likelihood would have had to travel 50 yards in a few seconds to set up a field goal.

"Granted, it's nice to have the security blanket of knowing you at least can't lose in regulation, and a lot can go wrong when you're punting, but wouldn't falling on the ball have greatly increased the Raiders chances of winning the game? We see this every week in the NFL, defensive players not understanding the consequences of what they do if they ever get the ball. Sometimes it will burn their team, as it did for San Francisco, and sometimes teams get lucky enough to overcome such absent-minded plays.''
-- Michael, Brooklyn, N.Y.

Sorry for the wall of text, but I want to focus on Peter's answer and I wanted you to know the whole question. I think it may have been smart to just drop to the ground, it was at least a viable option, but Peter disgrees. Peter uses some fuzzy logic to say the the Chargers could gotten the game-winning field goal.

PK: In the Raiders game, Oakland was ahead 28-27 with 70 seconds left -- with San Diego having two timeouts -- when Branch picked up a fumble and ran (untouched, I believe) for a touchdown. Had he knelt there, and I'll approximate the time here, the Raiders would have taken over at their 36 with 65 seconds left. Let's say Oakland ran the ball on three straight plays, or took a knee.

I can accept the 65 seconds. If Oakland ran two plays (where the Chargers called timeout after both of them), then I would say each play probably takes 4 seconds each, which leaves about 57 seconds left in the game before the third play. The Chargers would have run the third play, called timeout and gotten ready to punt with 18 seconds to go.

Oakland would have punted to the Chargers with something like 15 or 20 seconds left, down a point. Let's say they fair-catch the punt at the 25-yard line with 12 to 15 seconds left.

The fair catch probably would be taken at this point. Let's say the Chargers' punt goes from their 40 yard line to the 25 yard line and with a fair catch there would most likely be about 10-12 seconds left. I can handle Peter's math.

That's maybe two plays to get in position for a long field goal.

Which would be very difficult to get for the Chargers. Peter doesn't tell us how the hell the Chargers are going to go about 35 yards with 12 seconds left and no timeouts to get in field goal range, he just leaves it at what he said above and feels the need to explain no further. The Chargers would not only have to run two plays that go about 35 yards in 12 seconds, but their offensive players will also have to get out of bounds as well with the Raiders defending the sidelines.

I don't think Branch made a bad decision and going for the touchdown means the Chargers can't win the game in regulation, but Peter paints a more positive picture of the Chargers being able to get the game-winning field goal than reality shows. I think if you give the Chargers 1 minute and two timeouts to get a touchdown, that may happen more often than the Chargers going 35 yards in 12 seconds with no timeouts to get a field goal.

"One comment about Glen Coffee. I think he should be given the benefit of the doubt at this point in time. I don't think most of the story has come out yet, but the crime seems to be an unregistered pistol. A crime, yes, but nothing major. A small fine and he's done. I'm in no way defending having an unregistered hand gun; I just think it's a little early to be calling out the faith of a guy who just quit the NFL in order to pursue missions work.''
-- Hudson Moore, Nashville

PK: I suppose, but I happen to take an unregistered, loaded, cocked handgun within reach of a driver a little more seriously than that.

I could agree with this statement sometimes, but the unregistered, loaded, cocked handgun was within reach of the driver that left it unregistered, loaded and cocked. It's not like Coffee left the gun in someone else's car. It was his gun, so the odds of him getting confused and accidentally shooting himself or someone else weren't high. I'm not in favor of the situation, but Peter's reader was mostly referring to Peter bringing Coffee's faith into the discussion, which Peter did not even acknowledge or address in his answer.

"In regards to the Brett Favre situation, he must be suspended if he is found guilty of the acts in question. Here is why: this is a classic case of one employee in a powerful position (franchise QB) sending sexually explicit material to an employee in a low-level job, especially if the massage therapist claim is true. Did she have the ability to turn down his request for a massage after he sent her this material? How uncomfortable did she feel just trying to do her job afterward? This is why these rules against sexual harassment are in place.
-- Jody, Aurora, Ill.

PK: The question is, does this rise to the level of suspension under the NFL's personal conduct policy if, for the first time since 1996, a player runs afoul of the NFL behavioral policies?

The personal conduct policy wasn't in effect in the NFL until 2007, so the fact Favre has not run afoul of the policy before it was even instituted is not even relevant. This is a first time offense (if he is guilty) for Favre, so that should be taken into account, I will give Peter that.

That's what Roger Goodell is going to have to decide -- that plus the potential seriousness of the charge, obviously.

Plus Goodell should take into account how this will all affect Favre? He's tormented by his elbow and the overwhelming crappiness of his situation in Minnesota. If Favre knew all of his teammates weren't going to stay healthy and stick around to make him look good as a quarterback he wouldn't have even bothered gracing the public with his presence in the NFL this year. Favre regrets pretending to retire for the third straight summer. I hope everyone is happy about ruining everything for him.