MMQB Review: Peter King Goes Back Down South Edition

Last week we learned that Drew Brees is still grumpy with Roger Goodell over the suspensions due to members of the Saints defense placing bounties on opposing players. It just isn't fair to punish them when they haven't done anything wrong (stomps feet down and runs out of the room). This week it turns out there are comments allowed on Peter's columns (how long has this been happening? Am I just oblivious to everything like this?), Peter continues his camp tours, and checks-in with Terrell Owens...since apparently this is a person we have all been clamoring to be caught up on.

Black crepe paper hangs over the column this morning. Garrett Reid, Andy Reid's oft-troubled 29-year-old son, was found dead in his Lehigh University dorm room at Eagles' training camp Sunday morning.

I have no snarky comments for when someone dies...except for Brett Favre and possibly Backup QB/Punt Protector Jets. I would probably have something snarky to say about them. Otherwise, I feel for Andy Reid and his family.

The Eagles didn't sign Vick because Reid's sons urged their father to do it. But if you know Andy Reid,

Which we all know Andy Reid and know him well of course. His impression of a walrus singing Frank Sinatra songs is just hilarious.

you know he listened to his kids, and their feelings became a piece of a very large puzzle. Three years later, Garrett and Britt have been right on the money on Vick. Small consolation for a family that has to bury a son Tuesday. So sad.

It's a small consolation, or as I would refer to it, "no consolation" that Garrett was right about Mike Vick. At no point in the next few years will Andy Reid take any solace in the fact his son is dead, but was right about taking a chance on Mike Vick. So the correct wording to be used is "no consolation."

Is there a deal in the works for Jonathan Vilma? ESPN reported around midnight Sunday that the NFL has offered Vilma, who's suspended for a year as part of the sanctions against the Saints, a reduction of his ban -- from 16 to eight games if he drops his lawsuit against the league.

When will the NFL stop persecuting the Saints???????????? The NFL is willing to reduce the suspension if Vilma drops the lawsuit against the league. Where is the independent authority the NFL players didn't request in last year's CBA to rule on this case?

Football started last night, and the replacement officials were, at best, shaky...Ref Craig Ochoa got the coin flip wrong. After saying New Orleans won the toss and deferred, he got on his mike and said, "Correction, Arizona won the toss.'' Yikes.

Replacement refs are a bad idea, but in his defense, NFL refs have messed the coin toss up before as well. Maybe Ochoa was nervous. Regardless, the replacement official era in the NFL can't end quickly enough.

How Kyle Williams turned a nightmare upside down.

I meet Williams, who had the two-muffed-punt nightmare in the NFC Championship Game last January, and there's no mistaking his allegiances: He was wearing a Chicago White Sox hat and Jordan T-shirt, and underneath his friendly and respectful exterior, he came across as being Chicago tough.

I don't even know what "Chicago tough means." I feel like this is just a cliche that got randomly thrown in by Peter in order to better describe Kyle Williams as being nice, but still a football player.

The days that followed brought Twitter threats of harm to Williams and his family. (Sound familiar?)

It sounds familiar as to what happens to many athletes when they screw up and the cowards on Twitter start criticizing and threatening the player.

Do they? Loyalty to a well-liked and respected teammate is one thing. But this is a dog-eat-punt-muffer business. I asked Jim Harbaugh: Can you put Kyle Williams back there again to field a big punt?

"We like Kyle Williams; he is one of us,'' Harbaugh said. "The folks who want to continue bringing this up -- this is not going to be a continuing story. It isn't with us. We will not allow the media to hang an albatross around his neck. He is on the inside of the team looking out.''

Of course Ted Ginn will be returning nearly all of the punts this year as long as he is healthy. So it's easy to say it isn't a continuing story because it won't be a story at all as long as Ginn stays healthy.

Matt Leinart is a solid No. 2 at quarterback. I'd be surprised if Terrelle Pryor dents the top two without an injury ...

The good news is the Raiders can get that third round pick they spent on Pryor back, if they could just find the receipt they got when they purchased Pryor in the supplemental draft...

They went around and around trying to figure a way to keep Kamerion Wimbley, but in the end, keeping Wimbley likely would have cost them a more valued player in Tyvon Branch. "The pie's only so big, and I needed to learn about that,'' Allen said. "A head coach in the NFL needs to learn about those things

Honestly, I would hope this is something a head coach would learn before he became a head coach. I feel like the salary cap and what money can be spent on or can't be spent on certain players is something a coach should learn prior to becoming a head coach. What do I know though? I thought giving up a 1st and 2nd round pick for Carson Palmer and giving up a third round pick for Terrelle Pryor were both stupid decisions.

It's unmistakable around here: There is respect for the late Al Davis -- reverence by some. But there's only one Al, and when he died, his way of roster-building and team-operating went with him.

So it turns out you can get rid of stupidity and bad decision-making. You just have to wait for stupidity and bad decision-making to pass away from old age.

Allen's running a high-energy camp. His two most important players, Carson Palmer and Darren McFadden, have bought in.

Palmer says he's never been more excited about a football season in his life,

This sounds like a news-worthy item and doesn't sound at all like a cliche which players would only say before regular season games have started.

Darren McFadden was even going to comment on how excited he was for this upcoming season, but he twisted his ankle coming over to talk to Peter and will miss 4-6 weeks with a broken arm when Palmer tried to grab McFadden's arm to prevent him from falling after twisting his ankle. Then McFadden pulled a muscle getting on the trainer's table and broke his jaw chewing his dinner. He's pretty fragile.

Imagine being Palmer, being told you're definitely not being traded by the Bengals last year, not doing any football training or much throwing after the season started, getting traded on the day of the deadline, and playing an NFL game five days later?

If I imagine I am Carson Palmer and know I all of these things about how great it is to play for the Raiders, can I also imagine I am Carson Palmer and know I acted like a baby in demanding a trade from the Cincinnati Bengals last year?

The Bengals years beat him down, and he didn't play well near the end, and he decided he wasn't going to play football anymore unless the Bengals traded him. Which, finally, they did.

And of course the Bengals were never heard from again, except for when they made the playoffs behind the play of a rookie quarterback.

Palmer told me offensive coordinator Greg Knapp is "a phenomenal teacher, a genius'' (someone call Terrell Owens for comment).

I'LL GO AHEAD AND CALL TERRELL OWENS ABOUT THIS. I HAVE HIS PHONE NUMBER RIGHT HERE!

called back Mike Goodson "shockingly good,''

As someone who has seen Mike Goodson play over the last three years, he fumbles the ball shockingly frequently.

and added, "I know I can play as well as any quarterback in this league.''

And I know I could be an NBA player if I had just tried a little bit harder to work on my skills. Let's just say Carson Palmer and I both have the same odds of our statements being true.

Cameron Wake had 39 sacks in two CFL seasons playing defensive end, which is a major reason the Dolphins aren't worried about Wake's transition from outside linebacker to defensive end as Miami switches from the 3-4 to the 4-3

Because playing defensive end in the CFL and playing defensive end in the NFL are pretty much comparable when considering the level of talent at the offensive line position.

Garrard was very good the day I saw him, throwing well on the run and hitting Wallace on a deep go. And very determined. "I've got a fire in my belly to finish my career the right way,'' said Garrard, released just before the Jacksonville opener last year. Which, by the way, still hurts. "They introduced me at the team luncheon as the starting quarterback, and as soon as we get back after the luncheon I'm told to go see [coach] Jack Del Rio, and he says, 'We feel it's best to go in a different direction.' They threw me under the bus, which I didn't appreciate.''

There are several cliches/word usages that I wish idiot athletes (and regular people as well) would use correctly. The two biggest cliches/word usages that irritate me are as follows:

1. The use of the word "literally" when it is not fucking used as meaning literally.

"My head literally exploded."

No, it did not. If so, your head would be in a thousand pieces on the floor. The use of the word "literally" means it actually occurred, so to use it in a sentence while exaggerating is completely and utterly missing what the word means.

"If we don't win this challenge, we are literally going to be fighting for our lives in this competition."

Unless someone is going to murder you, this is not correct. The word you are looking for is "figuratively." The word "literally" is now being used to show extra emphasis in a sentence rather than to describe what actually may/did occur, which literally annoys me.

2. The use of the phrase "threw me under the bus" when you aren't talking about publicly blaming someone for an incident. David Garrard did not get thrown under the bus by the Jaguars. I recognize he went to East Carolina University and I should only expect a certain amount of literacy from any of their graduates, but if the Jaguars had introduced him at the luncheon as their starting quarterback and then spoke about how all the reasons for the Jaguars failures in the previous season were Garrard's fault and that's why they have to cut him, then that would be "throwing him under the bus."

The Jaguars simply cut him after introducing him at a luncheon. They didn't publicly blame him for anything. This is not throwing anyone under the bus.

I say Schiano's going to be the best of this new lot of head coaches. He coached in the NFL as an assistant, then made the worst program in major-college football (Rutgers) top-25 caliber,

Schiano did a great job with Rutgers, but I would argue with him making Rutgers top-25 caliber during most of his tenure at Rutgers. Schiano was 28-34 in a mostly weak-ish Big East after I kindly throw out his first two years where he went 0-7 in the Big East. He went 8-5 and 9-4 a few years in the Big East. He's a great coach and Rutgers is a tough job, but Rutgers wasn't a perennial Top-25 worthy team. They were a decent team in a pretty weak conference.

Three football nuggets: The $7-million-a-year free-agent wideout, Laurent Robinson, hasn't had a starry first week of camp, but he caught a bullet from Blaine Gabbert on a well-run cross in the Friday scrimmage ...

Wait, so a potential free agent who had never shown the type of success he showed in the year before he hit free agency isn't having a good camp after he signed a big free agent contract? This is unheard of and completely unexpected!

But wise, old Jacksonville scribe Vito Stellino has it crystal-clear correct when he notes that the Jaguars aren't going to prosper, Jones-Drew or no Jones-Drew, unless Gabbert is significantly better than he was last season.

Breaking news: In general, a quarterback has to play well for his team to have success. Spread the word.

What a yappy, infectious practice. If you don't watch much football practice, you'd be surprised at the competition that goes on,

"If" Peter's readers don't watch much football practice among NFL teams. Because most of his readers travel around the country and watch football practices.

For the last four years, Samuel was the mouth that roared in practices and in games for Philadelphia. Now he's the mouth of the south. "Guys see the fun he's having and they can't help but have fun too,'' Weatherspoon said.

Matt Ryan has to hold onto a ball in the pocket too long. Samuel screams: "Coverage sack! Coverage sack! I do it all!"

Then on the very next play the Falcons ran a stretch running play with Michael Turner headed towards Samuel's side of the field and Samuel immediately tucked himself into a ball and started rolling off the field to get out of Turner's way.

So here's our schedule for the week. For all the Bills fans out there (I'll make it up to you; promise) I apologize in advance for missing the Thursday night game and not being able to work the locker room afterward.

"Work the locker room afterward." What does Peter think he is, a stripper or something?

The Hall of Fame induction ceremony Saturday night brought back to the fore the never-ending Canton debates that we can't seem to get enough of. Case in point: My Twitter feed was chock-full of vitriol when I said I haven't supported Denver running back Terrell Davis, despite his 2,008-yard rushing season, Super Bowl MVP, league MVP and amazing seven 100-yard rushing games in eight postseason starts. What about Gale Sayers?

This is the "lowest common denominator" way of looking at why Terrell Davis should be in the Hall of Fame. I'm not saying Gale Sayers didn't deserve Hall of Fame induction, but his career numbers aren't spectacular. So fans of certain players who aren't in the Hall of Fame are going to point to Gale Sayers and his career statistics as why their favorite running back should be in the Hall of Fame.

Terrell Davis vs. Gale Sayers

Career Numbers

Player G Rushes Yards Avg. Rush TDs Rec./Yards/Avg. PR Avg. KR Avg. Ret TDs Gale Sayers 68 991 4,956 5.0 39 112/1,307/11.7 14.5 30.6 8 Terrell Davis 78 1,655 7,607 4.6 60 169/1,280/7.6 -- -- --

Based on these numbers alone, it seems like Terrell Davis has a pretty good argument for making the Hall of Fame. He didn't have the kick return abilities that Sayers had, but otherwise his numbers look pretty good in comparison to Sayers.

My rationale is pretty simple, and it's beyond the salient facts that Sayers had a pretty impressive career for numbers and honors, being named All-Pro five straight years (Davis three) and to the NFL 75th Anniversary All-Time Team in 1995.

Irrelevant. It is possible Davis played in an era with other great running backs (Emmitt Smith), so being named All-Pro was more difficult for him than it was Sayers. This very well may not be true, but to base part of the rationale that Davis should not be in the Hall of Fame on how many All-Pro teams he was named to also brings the other running backs during Davis' era into the discussion. These are the names of the other running backs in the Top 15 in rushing yards during Davis' 2008 yard season in 1998.

Barry Sanders
Emmitt Smith
Marshall Faulk
Eddie George
Curtis Martin
Fred Taylor
Ricky Watters
Jerome Bettis
Robert Smith

I count four Hall of Fame running backs and two guys who may have a decent shot. Davis played in an era with some good running backs, so it could have been harder for him to be named to All-Pro. Sayers also played in a good era for running backs, but to bring in All-Pro teams as a rationale for why Sayers deserves the Hall of Fame and Terrell Davis doesn't is to bring in the other running backs of the era into the discussion as well. When discussing All-Pro teams made, the level of excellence among the other running backs in the NFL at that time has to be mentioned and discussed.

Not to mention, Davis was a rookie in the NFL when the 75th Anniversary Team was named in 1995, so this is really isn't a fair criteria to use in comparing he and Sayers.

Sayers had five outstanding seasons, Davis four (three truly outstanding ones and one very good one).

Davis had more attempts, rushing yards, touchdowns, and nearly as many receiving yards in 1.5 fewer outstanding seasons. He did more in less time.

I look at Sayers and see a transcendent back, one of a kind, whose career was cut short by two knee injuries. I look at Davis and see a terrific back, not one of a kind, whose career was cut short by knee problems as well.

The numbers say Davis was a transcendent back too, just without the return abilities. I am not sure I could vote for Davis into the Hall of Fame, but if you compare him to Sayers then he may have a good shot. I like longevity and excellence over a 9-10 year span for a running back to make the Hall of Fame.

Mr. Starwood Preferred Member Travel Note of the Week

At one of our hotels in the South the other day, a Marriott TownePlace Suites, there was a breakfast buffet. I'm a Cheerios, Shredded Wheat or oatmeal guy in the morning, preferably with some blueberries or some other berry. No Cheerios. No Shredded Wheat. No oatmeal. No blueberries. No berries of any sort.

There were, however, three kinds of grits: creamy, bacon and a third I don't recall.

They didn't have the exact kind of free breakfast you wanted in the morning? What did the police say about this? Tell me you reported this to hotel management at least. How the hell can a hotel "in the South" (which apparently is a phrase that now is used to cover thousands of miles with no distinction as to what part of the South that Peter was in) take away your privileged existence like this? What makes it worse is "the South" doesn't even have restaurants you can eat breakfast at outside of this one Marriott. "The South" is just a barren wasteland of Ku Klux Klan meetings and tobacco crops being grown. This was Peter's only chance to eat all day.

I wouldn't want Peter to think this privileged Northern existence is any way being affected by having to eat at a free breakfast buffet that doesn't contain the exact sort of food he wants to eat. Has he never been in a social situation where he has been given food he doesn't want to eat or doesn't like? Is Peter a child and he can't make the best of a situation?

5. I think those who saw Sean Payton Saturday night at the Hall of Fame induction ceremony said he appeared happy and had big hugs for Drew Brees and interim coach Joe Vitt. And the lens of Times-Picayune photographer Michael DeMocker shows one other thing: Payton's used his free time while being suspended to work out hard. He's ripped.

This is what happens when your wife and you get a divorce, plus you get suspended from your job. You can spend all of your time working out hard to get in good physical shape for the ladies all while silently venting about how wrong the NFL has truly done you for merely coaching a team that repeatedly broke NFL rules.

The Patriots were interested in acquiring Kellen Winslow from Tampa Bay before the Bucs dealt him to Seattle. I'm told the relationship between Bucs coach Greg Schiano and Bill Belichick had something to do with the deal not getting made with the Patriots. Schiano knew Winslow wouldn't be Belichick's kind of player, and so the Bucs -- who would have been advantaged by sending Winslow to an AFC team instead of the NFC 'Hawks -- made a deal for a conditional seventh-round pick with Seattle.

I also hear New England might have been willing to offer a sixth-round pick for Winslow at one point.

I see Greg Schiano hasn't learned yet that there are no friends in the NFL. Bill Belichick wouldn't think twice about sending a player to Schiano who isn't Schiano's type of player. So to save Bill Belichick from making a bad trade, the same Bill Belichick who has gone to five Super Bowls in just over a decade, Greg Schiano got less value for Winslow and traded him within the Bucs' own conference. Do we really think Belichick would have paid the same courtesy, or even should have paid the same courtesy, to Schiano? It's a competition and sometimes there are no friends.

If I were a Bucs fan, I wouldn't be happy about hearing this. My head coach just took a higher draft pick and traded Winslow into the same conference as Tampa Bay because he didn't want an opposing head coach to trade for a player who isn't "his kind of player."

9. I think the one side note in the Jonathan Vilma settlement talks is that, if he settles and returns this season, by the time he does return, he very well could have lost his job permanently to free agent acquisition Curtis Lofton. That would be pretty awkward.

Almost as awkward as Vilma hitting the free agent market and looking for work after being accused of taking bounties out on opposing players as a Saint. We would probably learn fairly quickly if Drew Brees is right and NFL players are mad at Roger Goodell so they would be happy to have Vilma sign with their team or if some teams/players wouldn't want Vilma wearing their uniform.

d. Michael Phelps should be everyone's hero.

Jay Mariotti would disagree.

e. I just wish I'd gotten to see a couple of his races. I did see Bob Costas' interview with him late Saturday night, and he seems pretty set on retiring. I've pretty much missed the entire Olympics, except I caught that English heptathlete, Jessica Ennis, winning her gold. What a beloved athlete she seems to be in her homeland.

"I have no real insights to give about the Olympics so rather than say nothing, which is not in my nature, I will make a generalized statement."

f. Regarding the Wisconsin Sikh temple shootings that left six dead Sunday: When, oh when, will our leaders in this country lead and do something about gun violence?

If only we had precogs. Where is Tom Cruise when you need him?

h. Coffeenerdness: I'm not denigrating Jacksonville or anything, but I stayed at the Omni Hotel downtown late last week and went down to the lobby in the morning, looking to take a walk to get a coffee. "Where's the nearest Starbucks?'' I asked the parking guy in front. He said the nearest one was a little more than two miles away, and there wasn't one in the city's business district downtown. Amazed, I said, "Any other coffee bars downtown?'' None, the guy said, at least to his knowledge.

Since Jacksonville probably doesn't judge itself as a city based completely upon how many coffee bars it has downtown, I'm not sure I would worry about Jacksonville, which is a city without human emotions, feeling denigrated.

i. An American inner city, without a Starbucks. Now I've heard it all.

Not to mention, there was a Marriott "in the South" without any cereal options AND without any breakfast options in the surrounding area either. Let's just add Jacksonville as part of "the South" since it doesn't seem to have the necessities "real" American cities have, like overpriced coffee bars.

j. Beernerdness: The Beer of the Week (and trust me, there was a lot of competition, particularly from Intuition Brewery in Jacksonville) is Sweetwater 420 Extra Pale Ale, which made me think I was back in Seattle. Really crisp and wonderful on the palate.

For once, Peter and I can absolutely agree. Sweetwater 420 Extra Pale Ale is fantastic. In fact, nearly every Sweetwater beer is fantastic. Peter and I are the bestest of friends now. The only thing that can tear us apart is the other 5000 words he wrote in MMQB.