MMQB Review: Sean Payton Doesn't Love Peter King Anymore Edition

When we last left Peter King he was transcribing entire Paul Brown speeches, describing how he and his wife stalked two innocent people throughout Europe, and realizes now it probably wasn't classless for Penn State to fire Joe Paterno by phone. This week Peter has started his training camp tours and the results of the absolute positivity coming from every single team because actual play has not started yet was very revealing for Peter. It's amazing how many positive-sounding nuggets of insight you can come up in late July when every team believes they have a chance to win the Super Bowl. Everyone believes they can win the Super Bowl when it is late summer and preseason games haven't started yet. Also, Drew Brees states to Peter that none of the players trust Roger Goodell, which is funny coming from the quarterback of the NFL team that put a bounty on fellow NFL players. Not to be dramatic, but the Saints sort of broke the trust of their fellow NFL players. Did Peter really expect Drew Brees, who has essentially covered his eyes and ears to any of the truth around the Saints bounty program to like Roger Goodell? I think Brees uses his child as his Twitter avatar so maybe when he Tweets stupid shit (like comparing the bounty scandal to the search evidence of WMDs in Iraq) people will be less prone to dislike him.

I'll get to the upstart Cardinals, the recharged Chargers, Drew Brees tsk-tsk-ing the commissioner, what Peyton Manning hates and the third-round pick who leads all rookies in charisma

Charisma is completely measurable by the way. This is in no way hyperbole. Peter King leads the world in loftiness. I'm not lying by stating this.

You want football. You want to see what I've seen. Five quickies from my first five camps

Apparently Peter saw five quickies in five training camps. After he and his wife stalked a couple around Europe last week, I'm starting to become concerned about Peter's extracurricular activities.

Sign of the Week: In San Diego GM A.J. Smith's office is this gem in a frame, from Winston Churchill: "History will be kind to me, for I intend to write it." Question is, Is Smith's Charger book on the last chapter?

(lightning strikes) Da-da-da-dum.

Fantasy Tips of the Week (which you should take with a shaker of salt):

And yet, Peter continues to give these fantasy tips. He knows he isn't good at something, yet he keeps on trying while ignoring all evidence to the contrary. He's like the Backup QB Jets of sportswriters in this way.

Wouldn't be surprised if, after Larry Fitzgerald, the Cardinal with the best receiving numbers will be Rob Housler. Get to know him. Tight end. Ken Whisenhunt loves him.

It's a good thing the Cardinals didn't spend a first round pick on a wide receiver this year then. That would be embarrassing if a second-year tight end drafted in the third round had more receiving yards than the Cardinals first round draft pick has. It's not like you want your receiver drafted in the first round to catch more passes than a tight end who caught 12 passes in his first year in the NFL.

Idiot of the Week: Me, for thinking that driving from Flagstaff, Ariz., to San Diego was a good idea. Seven hours and one scary pitch-dark encounter with a feral cat in a Gila Bend McDonald's parking lot later (don't ask; I will only further embarrass myself),

Hey, fuck you feral cat. Peter has taken on Starwood Preferred Members and the concierge desk at multiple Hilton Hotels around the country. He's not afraid of you.

If you blinked, you missed it. Or if you were gazing at the imposing San Francisco Peaks just north of the practice field in this lovely college town, you could have missed it too. Ryan Williams, who'd provided so much hope for the Cardinals' running game last summer before rupturing his patella tendon in a preseason game, took a handoff up the middle in the first practice of the summer. Then the second-round draft pick out of Virginia Tech in 2011 did something he hadn't done in 49 weeks: He juked one defender left while planting and cutting right, then did the exact opposite -- juke right, cut left. The crowd oooohed.

"Yeah,'' said Kolb. "But three, four cuts, after an injury like that. To trust your knee to make moves like that ... Wow."

On the field, Williams was reliving the play over and over, as reporters crowded around him. I asked if he'd heard the "Li'l Sweetness'' shoutout.

"I heard it,'' he said. "I heard it. Felt good.''

Cancel the season. The Super Bowl has been won already. Ryan Williams made a tough cut in practice and didn't blow his knee out. Now all he has to do is replicate this in a game 300 times and the Cardinals will be the last team standing with Kevin Kolb/John Skelton holding the Super Bowl trophy as the Super Bowl MVP and one of their names will be used in place of "Trent Dilfer" when asked to name an average quarterback who has won a Super Bowl.

Drew Brees has something on his chest.

A huge mole?

If you think the mayhem around the Saints is going to send them to 5-11ville, you're nuts. Too much talent. Too good a triggerman.

Thank you for clearing up the misconception that very few people had. I hate to see the JemeHill school of journalism has taken hold outside of the walls of ESPN. This school of journalism is where a sportswriter disproves an assumption that "everyone" is making, even though few people are actually making this assumption.

"If you think Sean Payton is going to retire and move to Vermont where he can legally marry Kenny Chesney, then you don't know Sean Payton. He will still coach in the NFL after he serves his year-long suspension."

There's a drill the offensive skill players run early in practice, with quarterbacks getting the ball out to sprinting receivers and tight ends quickly. It's a nonstop, ping-ping-ping, one-throw-after-the-other completion-fest, and Brees, by my count, threw 18 balls in a row that his receivers barely had to reach for. Every one, right there.

And we all know the ways players look in Training Camp against no opposing defense is rarely any different from how these players look during a regular season NFL game. That's why Armanti Edwards has made two Pro Bowls.

Obviously, removing the coach for the year and removing his aide-de-camp, Vitt, for the first 40 percent of the season is a crushing blow. Maybe it's naive, and maybe I trust Brees too much, but I can't see the season going down the toilet with a quarterback as good as Brees putting up 28 or 30 points a week.

Which he is obviously going to do with ease. Didn't you see how well he threw the ball during that offensive drill? It's not like the Saints need to play defense this year.

Peter is defending a team or person who doesn't require defending. I harbor no illusions the Saints are going to struggle this year. I think they are going to make the playoffs and then lose their first road playoff game like they usually do. Nothing has changed.

Brees and I talked for 45 minutes or so about the severe league sanctions against the team, the 77 games commissioner Roger Goodell banned players, coaches and the general manager, Mickey Loomis. It's clear he's angry about the severity of the suspensions.

And here I thought Brees was going to be happy about the suspensions. Let me guess, Brees also thinks the commissioner was out of line during the appeals process in some way? Spoiler alert: He does believe this.

On the 16-game Payton suspension: "I was utterly shocked. Shocked. And the way the suspension works -- it's like, You're cut off right now. We [the NFL] are going to tell you who you can and cannot talk to over the next year. [Payton is forbidden from talking to Saints players or front-office members.] That is completely ridiculous.''

That is the idea of a punishment. If the NFL players are going to allow Roger Goodell to be judge, jury and executioner, which they did allow in the latest CBA, then this is how punishments are handed down. Would Brees have preferred a step-down version of the punishment where Sean Payton is slowly weaned away from the team? Week 1 Payton can only see or talk to his team 4 hours a day, Week 2 he can only see or talk to his team 3 hours a day, and finally Payton can't see or talk to his team at all. This is not how punishments are handed down in sports. They handed down effective immediately. When a player is suspended in any sport that league commissioner doesn't allow the suspension begin at an indefinite future time. So I don't get how suspending Payton immediately is completely ridiculous.

On NFL players' attitudes to Goodell: Brees got quiet and thought for a moment, then said: "Nobody trusts him. Nobody trusts him. I'm not talking about a DUI, or using a gun in a strip club, which are pretty clear violations.

Unlike intentionally trying to hurt other NFL players for money and having audio of Gregg Williams offering Saints defenders money to injure San Francisco 49ers players. This is a situation completely open for some interpretation.

I think now if a guy has to come in to talk to Roger, he'll be very hesitant because he'll think the conclusion has already been reached.''

That will show Roger Goodell! Don't show up at all when he summons you to the league office to discuss your punishment. Then Goodell will simply hand down the punishment without discussing the issue with the player at all. That'll learn Goodell real good.

Now it was time for Brees to go to practice. "I feel it's all we've done here, overcome the odds. We're going to have to do it again.''

Yes, play the victim card Brees. You are a victim! A victim of the harsh NFL system that doesn't allow players to put bounties on other players. The world, the NFL, and God himself has done you wrong. Always remember you are a victim of the mean ol' NFL and the commissioner of the NFL. Use this as further proof the NFL is against you. The same NFL that allows you to make $40 million guaranteed over a five year period.

I already think Drew Brees has beaten the odds. What are the odds an educated, smart individual like him can be so blind to the truth of what happened in the Saints locker room and try to turn the Saints into victims in this situation?

Manning can hear what people are saying about him and read what writers are writing about him. Peyton's back to normal. Look at him throw. Look at his command of the Denver offense. He's back.

"I hate it,'' Manning said.

Because he's not. He's not all the way back.

Peyton Manning is going to show all you writers. You believe he is healthy and completely able to play the quarterback position at 100% WELL HE'S NOT! THE JOKE IS ON YOU! Manning isn't completely healthy yet, so don't all you writers feel stupid for even suggesting Manning is healthy and that feels like he can perform at a high level if the season began today. The truth is that Manning can barely walk when he wakes up in the morning. I bet you feel stupid now.

Manning doesn't feel like he's near 100 percent yet. It's not his neck, which has undergone four procedures in the past two years, including the major surgery 11 months ago that caused him to miss the 2011 season. It's simply the regeneration of the nerve that affects his arm strength, particularly the area around the shoulder.

Now I would bet those writers feel even more stupid. They all thought it was Manning's neck was the real issue, but that's not true. Manning has a completely different physical issue that is preventing him from being 100% right now. Manning has multiple physical red flags. I bet Broncos fans are glad Manning cleared this all up. It's not scary sounding at all.

After practice Saturday, he signed a load of autographs, a few of them for people wearing Manning Colts jerseys. To one such guy, Manning said, "Colts fan or Broncos fan?'' The guy said, "I'm a fan of yours.''

Oh, you are a fair weather fan then? Welcome to the Broncos bandwagon. Lifetime Broncos fans hate you and hope you leave immediately.

As I watched Manning's first padded practice in 19 months on a sun-splashed field, I saw him throw efficiently and accurately. His best throw of the day, on a double-move by Eric Decker against Champ Bailey, was exactly the kind of precision intermediate throw Tim Tebow wouldn't have made.

To be fair, Manning could throw the ball left-handed and still make throws that Backup QB Jets wouldn't have made. Let's set a higher standard here.

You can't count on 36-year-old Brandon Stokley to stay healthy, and it's no sure thing he'll even make the team. But if Stokley stays upright this summer and makes the team, Manning would have the wideout he calls the best slot wide receiver he's ever played with back as a security blanket. (It's a mistake to count on the brittle Stokley, however. I'm just raising the possibility that he could be a valuable piece for Manning.)

So Brandon Stokley may be incredibly valuable for Manning this year...or maybe not...but he could, if he stays healthy...but Peter doesn't expect him to stay healthy...if he does stay healthy then he will be especially helpful to the Broncos...but he probably won't stay healthy so it doesn't matter.

So if Manning completes 69 percent with seven yards per attempt, would that suit Denver? In a heartbeat. It'd suit most any team in the league, except perhaps for the explosive Saints or Packers.

The Saints or Packers would immediately trade any quarterback who dared to complete 69% of his passes with seven yards per attempt, no matter how many Super Bowls or playoffs they get to with a quarterback who has these statistics.

(By the way in 2007 and 2010 Drew Brees had below seven yards per attempt and less than a 69% completion percentage. It was unacceptable and that's probably why Drew Brees had to wait so long to get a new contract from the Saints.)

I think the way it is might not be as electric, but I think it's going to be good enough for Denver to get its $18 million worth.

Manning will never be another QB Broncos no matter how much money he receives or how many games he wins! Never! Let's see Manning throw a 10 yard slant into single coverage with no safety high to win a playoff game. Manning could never do this.

Matt Flynn, Tavaris Jackson, Wilson one day. Jackson, Wilson, Flynn another. Wilson, Flynn, Jackson the next. This is a strange training camp. Most teams know their starting quarterback this morning. A few are having double-barreled competition for the job.

You know how they say if you have two starting quarterbacks then you really have none? In my opinion, the same goes for having three starting quarterbacks.

But the vibe I got here Sunday is that Wilson has a legitimate shot to win the starting job. Carroll loves him. GM John Schneider loves him. Plus, Flynn's not the kind of player whose arm is going to wow you in a training camp.

But didn't we just learn from the whole "Peyton Manning is back and has less arm strength but he will still find a way to get it done" story just a few paragraphs ago that arm strength doesn't matter if a quarterback "just knows how to get it done?"

"I refuse to be average,'' Wilson said on the field after practice. "I refuse to be good.

Well, good news then...you very well may not be any good. Time will tell. Mission accomplished.

It's very difficult to make any judgments on a player, or a team, watching a pad-less practice, with players in helmets and shorts.

But that sure has hell isn't going to stop Peter King from making snap judgments right now about Russell Wilson. This is the typical, "We really shouldn't say or do this" comment by Peter, followed by Peter doing or saying exactly what he just said he shouldn't do or say. It's pretty much his trademark.

But Wilson's arm looked every bit as strong, and maybe slightly stronger, than Flynn's in this practice. On one snap, Wilson was flushed from the pocket, scrambled right ("He scrambles to throw; he doesn't scramble to run,'' Carroll said) and launched a slightly wavering 32-yard strike down the right side to a covered Ben Obomanu, who came down with the ball. Good play, the kind of play he's going to have to make in the NFL when the pocket breaks down.

Russell Wilson very well could be the Seahawks starter. It very well could happen, but I haven't ever understood why Peter King states it is difficult to make judgments based on Training Camp and then uses this information to make judgments about the Seahawk starting quarterback job based on Training Camp.

Cool kid. The quarterback competition is the best story in Seattle's camp, and the charismatic Wilson makes it that way.

I know for a fact N.C. State fans absolutely love (loathe) him.

4. Eagles (Bethlehem, Pa.) If you like hills, you'll love the campus of Lehigh University.

I am not a fan of Lehigh University. This is a training camp I would not enjoy visiting.

"I am 1,000 percent a Steelers fan!''

-- Prospective Cleveland Browns owner Jimmy Haslam III, in a 2010 interview with Bob Labriola of Steelers.com. Haslam is a minority owner of the Pittsburgh Steelers, and if his purchase of the Browns from Randy Lerner does go through as league people have told me they think it will, he'll have to divest himself of the Steelers share.

Now, I'm not positive about this, but I have a feeling that 2010 quote might -- might -- not go over well in northeast Ohio.

I'm not positive about this, but I think anyone owning that team outside of Randy Lerner will go over well in northeast Ohio. It's pretty funny a guy who is a huge Steelers fan will probably own the Browns. In Haslam's defense, he was a minority owner of the Steelers, so what else was he going to say at the time?

"We brought Santonio here to be a receiver, not offensive coordinator."

-- Jets coach Rex Ryan, on wide receiver Santonio Holmes' public skepticism on the chances a two-quarterback system (Mark Sanchez/Tim Tebow) will work with the Jets.

The good news for the Jets is they DON'T have a two-quarterback system. They have a one quarterback system with a running back who sometimes subs in at quarterback.

I accomplished something relatively Olympian last week, on the same day of the Olympic opening ceremonies, that I do believe made Peter King travel history: I was in all four continental United States time zones in one 24-hour period.

You want a full breakdown of where Peter was in these time zones? You don't? Tough, you get one anyway.

Thursday, 10:15 p.m. Pacific Time: Depart Karl Strauss pub, San Diego airport, and fly east.

And boy are Peter's arms tired.

Friday, 6 a.m. Eastern Time: Arrive Atlanta Hartsfield International Airport. Have an oatmeal breakfast.

I'm assuming if Peter had an oatmeal breakfast, then Peter also had his smoking jacket on during this meal, ate some grapefruit as a mid-morning snack and tuned into "Matlock" after taking his morning bath.

Friday 9 a.m. Central Time: Arrive New Orleans International Airport for day of Saints reporting.

Someone has to do reporting about the NFL in New Orleans since the Times-Picayune only puts out a paper three times a week.

"If the President of the U.S. is saying I need to slide then I really need to start sliding. Lol. Thanks Mr. President!''

-- @MikeVick, after Barack Obama told Eagles teammate Nnamdi Asomugha at a recent event, "Tell Vick to slide."

Mitt Romney, not one to be overshadowed, then told Mike Vick he needed to dunk more and he knows Vick will lead the Sixers to the NHL Playoffs this year.

In the Steelers' eyes, he did. So Pittsburgh, convinced it didn't want to risk losing both men next year when Brown would be a restricted free agent, gave Brown the deal they'd offered Wallace, a six-year, $42.5 million extension. Not bad for a sixth-round pick in 2010 from Central Michigan. Now Wallace is in limbo, not having signed his franchise tender ... and the Steelers saying they have no intention of trading him.

I'm not a Steelers fan, but that is straight fantastic they offered the exact same contract to Antonio Brown that they had offered to Mike Wallace. It's just wonderful.

"You don't want that contract? Fine, we'll offer it to your teammate."

Teams who draft well can afford to do things like this I guess.

I've always felt Lerner, who lives in downtown Manhattan near New York University, was more of a music and soccer fan (he owns Aston Villa of England's Premier League) than a football fan, and he'd hoped Mike Holmgren would wipe away all his troubles when Holmgren came aboard the Browns two years ago.

Who wouldn't love having an NFL owner who doesn't seem to really love owning a team and just wants someone to take the team off his hands?

Lerner badly wanted someone to come in and just take the headache that was the reconstruction of the Browns off his hands.

I wonder if Randy Lerner will send Tony Grossi an apology since it now seems Grossi was sort of right about Lerner and his lack of commitment to the Browns? Grossi got fired for that Tweet. Nah, being wealthy means never having to say you are sorry.

8. I think this is the cost of doing business the way I think it should be done in NFL journalism these days -- and I tell you this because it may affect my ability to know as much about the Saints as I've known in the past few years. Joe Vitt and Mickey Loomis, the New Orleans past and future 2012 brain trust, are not speaking to me, presumably because of my reporting on the Saints' bounty case.

This is absolutely ridiculous. Joe Vitt and Mickey Loomis are just being sensitive little bitches. I'm not prone to defending Peter King (if you can't tell already), but if anything I think Peter King has reported on the bounty scandal with a slight lean towards giving the benefit of the doubt to the Saints. It's bullshit and these two guys need to get over it. Peter reported the story while being fair to the Saints, if not being too fair to the Saints in my opinion. Maybe Vitt and Loomis don't like that Peter wasn't blindly giving his opinion that the Saints would NEVER do anything wrong, but if that's true they don't like Peter's blind loyalty to them, they should hold a grudge against most NFL fans outside the city of New Orleans.

Sean Payton told me earlier in the year he wouldn't speak to me either, because he didn't think I reported the story fairly. I'd had great relationships with Loomis and Payton. But that's how it goes. For the record, I regret nothing that I've written or said on the case.

If I needed any further proof that Sean Payton is a jackass, this is it for me. It's ridiculous to hold a grudge and be overly sensitive about the way anyone at Sports Illustrated covered this story. This whole "we are victims and being persecuted by the NFL" crap is really growing old. Grow a pair of balls about how the bounty scandal is being covered, and if you don't want to admit you did something wrong, at least allow others to give their opinion on the matter without giving the silent treatment to some reporters like you are an 8 year old child.

c. Missing the Olympics. I hate it when that happens. I'm a sucker for the stories. The most I've seen is a clip of the opening ceremonies in the Broncos cafeteria Saturday. Sure looked colorful. Weird shot of the Queen.

For me, easily the worst part of the Olympics are the opening ceremonies. They are too long, too bloated, and really boring. I'm not a fan. I tuned in for a few minutes Friday night and there was an old, creepy lady tucking children into bed. I don't know what the hell that was all about and didn't stick around to find out.

e. I love the A's. I don't know Jarrod Parker from Travis Blackley, but I hope I get to know both in October.

Of course the big baseball fan Peter King wouldn't know who Jarrod Parker is. Why would he know one of the best prospects in baseball? It's not like he enjoys watching the sport of baseball.

f. Someone should sit all the privately sniping Red Sox players and coaches in a room and tell them they look stupid, immature and ungrateful for the lives they have, and it has to stop.

Yeah, I agree. I can't believe some hotels don't have free coffee available in the lobby at exactly 6am either. That's not the kind of America I want to live in. Don't even get Peter started on any place in the United States that makes you pay for wireless Internet.