MMQB Review: Peter King Can't See Too Good, But Thinks That Is Joey Montana Over There Quarterbacking the Seahawks

Peter King discussed domestic violence in last week's MMQB. Hopefully we have all of the discussion of moral issues out of the way for the rest of the NFL season. Everyone is suspended, sorry I mean on the commissioner's exempt list, and all is well in the NFL again. Well, you know, except for the whole "Roger Goodell lied repeatedly about whether he saw the Ray Rice tape and what Rice described to him as happening on the elevator" thing, but based on Peter's lack of discussion on this topic in last week's MMQB, I'm guessing that issue won't be pushed hard any time soon. Peter King also criticized Matt Cassel for not playing well against the Patriots, but then praised him for playing well on one drive for some reason. So the NFL's arbiter of right and wrong is back this week to discuss how Russell Wilson saved the NFL, says the NFL needs a domestic violence czar (and now we are swinging the pendulum to overreacting in response to an under-reaction), and is amazed at how much Americans like their technology. I guess it's easier to be uppity about technology when your employer provides most of your electronic devices to you at no cost.

The adrenaline was still flowing for Russell Wilson an hour after a game that was supposed to be high drama, and actually was.
“The NFL needed this game,” Wilson said.

The NFL is saved. Because of you, Russell Wilson. Thank you for all you do. If it weren't for that Broncos-Seahawks game, I might have just stopped watching the NFL all together. Thank God Peter begins this column with such flowery language, because otherwise I wouldn't want to read another word about the NFL without Peter telling me the league is saved.

Games like this one are why people won’t throw the NFL out with the trash because of the Ray Rice scandal.

Which, by the way, is the same thing I thought last week as Peter was having an emo-breakdown about whether he should give up watching the NFL or not. People love the NFL and won't give it up because a few bad apples get in trouble for domestic violence allegations.

The NFL is on fire. The first Super Bowl rematch in 17 years couldn’t put it out, of course. But it could remind people who love football but are pissed off at it why they loved it in the first place. Wilson and Manning and the Broncos and the Seahawks did their best in three hours and 33 minutes to put some salve on the sport.

These narratives don't write themselves, you know. Peter has to put a lot of time into acting like the NFL will fall apart with no one watching the sport one week, followed by an exciting football game the next week that totally redeems the entire sport.

After Manning engineered one of the best drives of his career—six plays, 80 yards, no timeouts, 41 seconds, ending in a touchdown pass and two-point conversion—Wilson made it look easier in overtime. Does the man sweat? Does he get cotton-mouth?

I don't know. We'll see how he feels when his future ex-wife comes after any future earnings he might have if/when they go to court.

(I know that has nothing to do with anything, it just felt fun for some reason to be a hater)

On a brisk 13-play, 80-yard drive to start OT, Wilson threw the ball six times, handed it off three and ran it four times himself. And Seattle won 26-20.

It was a great last drive, no doubt. The Broncos couldn't seem to keep Wilson in the pocket.

Tony Dungy compared Wilson to a young Joe Montana a couple of weeks ago, and the hyperbole-prompted snickers were everywhere. But what about Wilson isn’t Montana-like?

Oh Peter, so many things about Wilson aren't Montana-like. Can't we just let Russell Wilson be Russell Wilson and stop prematurely comparing him to Hall of Fame quarterbacks? Can't Russell Wilson just stand on his own until his career comes closer to ending? What is wrong with just stating he is a really good quarterback? Or would that just not involve the excessive amount of hyperbole required for MMQB? It constantly annoys me how sportswriters have to start the comparisons of one player to another way too early. What isn't Montana-like about Wilson is he hasn't played at a high level for over a decade, while Montana did. Simmer the fuck down.

Shorter guys. Don’t put up gaudy stats. Teammates love them. Coaches love them. Tremendous internal drive to win. Both 25 when they won their first Super Bowl. And, most important, they play big in the big games.

Welp, it's settled then. Russell Wilson is Joe Montana. Nothing left to do or prove at this point. So for the rest of his career, no matter how the rest of his career ends up, Russell Wilson IS Joe Montana. That's the takeaway here?

“That’s a team record,” Wilson said by phone from the bowels of CenturyLink. “When we play against the best, like we did today, it’s a humbling experience. I want to be up there with those guys one day. It’s a thrill to be able to play in games like this, against guys like Peyton, and I just want to excel when we play them. It can’t get any better than a game like this today.”
I want to be up there with those guys one day.
You’re there.

No, he is not there. If Russell Wilson plays like Blaine Gabbert for the rest of his career then he will be considered like quarterbacks such as Brady, Manning, Rodgers and Brees? That is what Peter is saying? That's pure bullshit. Wilson is getting there, but he's not there. Stop being a hyperbolic drama queen. Wilson is on his way to being considered a great quarterback, but he's not there after less than three full seasons in the NFL.

Wilson gathered his offense before he took the first snap and said, “This is what we live for, fellas: championship moments. Let’s go out and embrace it.”

Then he said, "Is that John Candy sitting in the stands?" and Peter King knew that Russell Wilson was a great quarterback just like Joe Montana. Nothing could ever change that, unless something in the next decade ends up changing that.

“I know I shouldn’t say this,” Wilson said, “but I actually wanted overtime. Of course I want to win in regulation, but overtime is so much fun. I live for those moments.”

Just like Joe Montana. In fact, Russell Wilson's real last name is "Idaho," but he changed it because he didn't want everyone to make the obvious comparison to Joe Montana. Wilson's real last name is also a state, just like Joe Montana. Joe Montana played quarterback at Notre Dame which is a university located in a state in the United States, just like Russell Wilson played quarterback at Wisconsin which is a state in the United States. Joe Montana played football and Russell Wilson played with Monte Ball. Joe Montana got traded to the Chiefs late in his career, which made Steve Young the 49ers starting quarterback. Russell Wilson is young and has never played the Chiefs. Joe Montana wore #16 in San Francisco, Russell Wilson wears #3 for the Seahawks. If you add them together you get 19 and that's the number Montana wore for the Chiefs. I don't think anyone has ever seen them in the same room together either.

“My father always told me, ‘Don’t be afraid to excel.’ ” Russell Wilson was taught well.

See, now that's where Joe Montana is more like Blaine Gabbert. Montana's dad told him "Don't be afraid to fail miserably." I guess they just aren't that alike and Joe Montana's father is an asshole for not teaching his son well.

When I think of Drew Stanton, I don’t think of many big NFL moments. None, really. But I do think of the man who was signed by the Jets in 2012, paid a signing bonus of $500,000, then traded seven days later because the Jets had a crazy brainstorm and impulsively signed Tim Tebow.

Don't blame Tim Tebow for that. God did it. It wasn't impulsive at all. It was God's will to give Tim Tebow another chance in the NFL. God wanted to show that Tebow is a terrible quarterback and he should immediately give up the sport as quickly as possible. He had a plan.

“I signed with the Jets because I thought it was a great situation, and because I had the word of [coach] Rex Ryan and [then-GM] Mike Tannenbaum that I’d be the backup. A few days later I started hearing rumors about Tim and the Jets. I said, ‘No way.’ They just paid me a bonus and committed to me. So, my wife and I are down in Florida the week after I sign with them. It’s her birthday. We’ve got a doctor’s appointment—we’re going to find out whether she’s pregnant with a boy or a girl. We find out it’s a boy, and I come out of the doctor’s office and my phone’s blowing up. The Jets got Tim. We went for a walk along the Intracoastal Waterway, trying to figure out what to do. I mean, I was shocked. I had their word, and then this happened.

It sounds like a terrible situation for an organization to pay you $500,000 to do absolutely no work at all. With a child on the way, especially. It's just, how is Stanton supposed to survive with $500,000 in his pocket and having to do absolutely no work to earn it?

“But, sitting here right now, it’s one of the best things that ever happened to me.”
Huh?

He got $500,000 to do nothing. He went from the Jets to a team coached by Bruce Arians, who has Ben Roethlisberger and Andrew Luck on his resume as two quarterbacks he helped coach early in their career.

Shortly after signing Tebow, the Jets traded Stanton to Indianapolis, where he would back up rookie Andrew Luck. The Colts’ offensive coordinator was Bruce Arians. Stanton hadn’t worked for him before. When he got to Indy, Stanton loved the guy, and Arians loved him back.

But it was not to be. Andrew Luck was standing in the way of their love. So Arians had to leave. He had to go. He couldn't be around Stanton and not have him as his own and Stanton was stuck in Indianapolis backing up Andrew Luck. Impulsively, Arians went to Arizona to be the Cardinals coach and hope he could find another quarterback to love. It wasn't to be.

But it wasn't over then and it's still not over now, because Arians brought Stanton with him to Arizona. They reunited, but now Carson Palmer stood in the way of their love.

In two games, Stanton is 32 of 62 (51.6%), with two touchdowns and no picks, a rating of 83.5. “My stats stink,” he said, “and I don’t care. Stats mean nothing to me—wins do. I love Bruce’s offensive philosophy. He wants to push the ball downfield. That fits me. The numbers aren’t going to be great.

Right, the numbers won't be great because you aren't a great quarterback. This is the typical language a shitty quarterback who somehow manages to win games uses. Understood. But the love, the love Arians and Stanton feel makes it all worth it.

Arians has a deft touch with his quarterbacks. He had Ben Roethlisberger in Pittsburgh for years, then Andrew Luck for one year in Indianapolis, and then he helped resurrect Palmer’s career in Arizona last season. Now Stanton.

It's almost like he's good at coaching up quarterbacks.

What an amazing story: The Arizona Cardinals, half of their defensive keystones gone and keyed by a quarterback who hadn’t taken a snap since 2010 and a receiver who was playing small-college football a year ago, beating the San Francisco 49ers and alone, ahead of Seattle, atop the NFC West. Football is a crazy game.

"We" didn't expect this to happen! "We" are shocked that football is a crazy and unpredictable sport. Who knew this could be true?

As Cincinnati quarterback Andy Dalton raises his game early in 2014—and we have to be careful here, because Dalton has been a very good regular-season quarterback, only to fail in the playoffs in each of his three NFL seasons—it’s becoming clear that the multifaceted game plans of first-year Cincinnati offensive coordinator Hue Jackson are a big reason why.

Of course Peter has to shit on Andy Dalton a little bit. Because, why not? Dalton still didn't win a playoff game this past weekend.

Also, in summary:

Andy Dalton has succeeded in his first 3 years in the NFL because of Hue Jackson's game planning, even though Jackson wasn't his offensive coordinator during his first three years in the NFL. Maybe he is raising his game this year, but it's not like Dalton was really shitty previously. Russell Wilson is a great quarterback like Joe Montana because he is individually great under the same offensive coordinator he's had since he was a rookie. Dalton's great play is a by product of those around him, while Wilson's success is not attributed to any help around him. Okay then.

Dalton said self-assurance is a big part of his game, and of Jackson’s. “We’re playing with a lot of confidence right now. When he calls something, I really think it’s going to work,” Dalton said. That’s what a quarterback wants in his play-caller.

No, Andy Dalton said THE TEAM is playing with a lot of confidence. He did not say that referring to Hue Jackson. It is Peter King who has decided that Hue Jackson is the big reason Andy Dalton is a good regular season quarterback. Andy Dalton did not say that, Peter King wants to believe he did.

“It’s one of those deals where the coach might say, ‘Great play. Don’t make that same read again,’ ” Dalton said. But Dalton also knows Jackson will probably have something else strange in the game plan when the Bengals come out of their bye week—and it will probably work. Through three weeks, he’s had a good run of play calls.

Yes, and that is why Andy Dalton was a good regular season quarterback when Hue Jackson wasn't making the play calls. Of course.

I completely recognize the difference in Andy Dalton and Russell Wilson, but I find it funny how Peter goes on and on about Wilson in MMQB being individually great while ignoring Darrell Bevell and the Seahawks defense helping him be great, while heaping zero praise on Andy Dalton and simply stating the play calling is why Dalton is so great this regular season. Interesting difference to me.

We’re still waiting to hear the Ravens’ reaction to the damaging ESPN story claiming the organization knew how bad the Ray Rice tape was but tried to downplay it to minimize his league punishment.

Later, Rice’s attorney told club president Dick Cass that the video was “horrible” and, according to ESPN, Cass responded by urging for Rice to enter a pre-trial diversion program. Meanwhile, according to ESPN, the Ravens were arguing for leniency for Rice, and strongly urged commissioner Roger Goodell to suspend Rice for only two games. That’s what Goodell did.

So Peter is going to talk about the whole "Roger Goodell possibly lied and is now trying to hide behind tough retroactive stances" issue in this week's MMQB? It was left out last week, so I can't help but wonder. Of course Peter isn't going to actually go hard on Roger Goodell. They have a lunch next week at Skyline Chili and there can't be any awkwardness at such an occasion.

Either way, the Ravens have some explaining to do, particularly with respect to Sanders and Cass. If Sanders knew how damaging the elevator video was and passed that information on to upper management, and Cass pressed for leniency knowing how bad the elevator tape was (as ESPN suggested), both men could have to answer to owner Steve Bisciotti and/or the investigator retained by the league, former FBI director Robert Mueller.

But, neither NFL owner overseeing the investigation sees Roger Goodell's job security as being in question. They have already stated this, so it's hard to really give a shit what Robert Mueller finds. If nothing changes, it's just a pointless investigation.

Ryan’s numbers were ridiculously good—six punts, 50.2 yards per punt, and a 47.7-yard net; only one of the six punts was returned for positive yardage. Ryan was huge in the biggest game of the year so far because he kept giving Peyton Manning long fields. And long fields in Seattle are most often fruitless fields. Most impressive was this fact: Manning never led the Broncos to a score on a possession following a Ryan punt. That’s a huge day’s work.

Great punting never gave Peyton Manning an easy field to go against the NFL's best defense. But Peter's takeaway from the Broncos-Seahawks game is how Russell Wilson is already up there with Aaron Rodgers, Tom Brady and Peyton Manning, while he is also just like Joe Montana. Peter passes up explanations for contributions to Wilson's success in favor of hyperbole.

Said coach Pete Carroll: “Jon Ryan just had an incredible influence in this game, throughout. If there was anybody who was MVP, it might have been Jon Ryan today with his effort, because he had probably the best day of his career.”

Jon Ryan is already up there with the greatest punters in NFL history.

Oddest event of the day: Rams tight end Jared Cook dropped a fairly easy touchdown catch in the end zone against the Cowboys, and went back to the Rams’ sideline.

Jared Cook didn't play up to the expectations his talent level indicates? That's not really that odd. It's been the story of his career so far.

Quarterback Austin Davis stuck his hand out as if to say, Hey, we’ll get ’em next time. No worries. Cook angrily slapped his hand away. Strange, because it was Cook’s fault, and he was acting all angry when the quarterback went to tell him it’d be fine. And so Sunday evening, Cook tweeted: “My actions from today’s game were truly a mistake—unintentional and in the heat of the moment. There is never an excuse for unsportsmanlike conduct and I apologize to everyone.” Good for him.

It's a team on the rise full of really great players who are also great guys!

Amazing how quickly we’ve forgotten the story of 2013. There’s Jonathan Martin starting at right tackle for a playoff team, San Francisco. There’s Richie Incognito sitting at home, wishing his phone would ring so he could play guard somewhere, anywhere. Martin plays, and it’s as if what happened 11 months ago never occurred.

Stop saying "we" have forgotten. No, "we" haven't. It's just an older story now.

That has been the backbone of the NFLPA’s argument for three years: We do not want the same body—Goodell or his people—to pass judgment on players and then hear the appeals. It’s double jeopardy. It’s patently unfair. Finally, the players won. And it’s right. The new system will be more fair.

And as one league official estimated, 80% of all appeals heard by the league are in recreational or performance-enhancing drugs. So how far would Goodell have to go now to simply turn over all appeals to a third party?

Maybe Roger Goodell could turn over the appeals to his good friend Godger Roodell, who totally hates domestic violence and is the wisest man that Roger Goodell knows.

It is past time that Goodell passes off the job of discipline in general in big cases, particularly in the legally complex and time-consuming domestic violence cases, where I think he should name a domestic violence czar who would take all of those cases out of the hands of teams and into the hands of a uniform NFL code-interpreter.

But if Roger Goodell names a domestic violence czar (and where is Bill Simmons to apply for this job? He wants every "czar" job in the NBA, so maybe he should take this "czar" job) then that will be perceived as the NFL expecting there to be enough domestic violence cases from their players to require enough time that an individual person will be responsible for take those cases. That's probably not a great message the NFL wants to send.

Goodell would sort of be saying, "The NFL takes domestic violence seriously, so because we currently and probably will in the future have enough domestic violence cases for it to take up a lot of my time, I'll pass all of those on to a third-party."

How a domestic violence czar could work: As soon as there is a charge of domestic violence, the czar and her/his staff would investigate the case initially to see if there is enough evidence to take the player off the field immediately, to judge how due process should work in the case, and to see what alternatives there are for employees (such as a non-football-illness designation, as the Cardinals did with Jonathan Dwyer after he confirmed concerns about his mental health in talks with the team and local police).

Sounds great, but it's still a bad message to be sending to the public that there will be enough domestic violence cases to require a czar AND a staff for that czar. Besides, this would involve giving up some of his powers to a third party, and I don't think Roger Goodell has shown he is entirely capable of embracing this.

The status of players charged with domestic violence is too important an issue in society to be left to teams. The league should have one uniform policy, to be administered by a certified expert in the area.

But if there is a uniform policy then couldn't NFL security look into the situation and administer the policy, just like other NFL policies are administered? I don't know if this is a bad idea on it's face, but it seems like an overcorrection to make up for the NFL's lack of response to domestic violence cases. Domestic violence is a very important issue, but I think it's important not to overcorrect.

Goodell needs to get out of the morass of this issue and leave it to an expert or small group of experts to handle. Too many women’s groups—and women—won’t trust him no matter what the NFL does with domestic violence going forward. 

And of course, if Roger Goodell can't be trusted to implement and administer a domestic violence policy then that brings up the question of why he should be trusted to be the NFL commissioner? Or is domestic violence policy implementation Goodell's only weak spot and he's solid at figuring everything else out? But hey, he's forming a committee so I'm sure that means everything is in good shape now.

It shouldn’t have taken 38 months to get HGH testing in the NFL; that’s obvious. This should have been done a couple of years ago.

I guess we'll see how that goes, right? I'm interested. I will say that much. HGH testing in the NFL could be fun.

Fine Fifteen

1. Seattle (2-1). Does Russell Wilson feel pressure? Ever?

Never. He's like, no, he's better than Joe Montana in that way. 

2. Cincinnati (3-0). Amazing performances continue with the rout of the Titans. What don’t the Bengals do well right now? Andy Dalton even catches touchdowns. Gio Bernard is turning into a terrific all-around back. And look at the defense: In three games, opposing quarterbacks have a league-low 56.9 rating. Now the Bengals have the early bye, then … Bengals at Patriots in 13 days sure looks like it could be a great game.

Please remember I picked the Bengals last in the AFC North this year. It made sense at the time to me...and me only.

4. Arizona (3-0). Three wins, by 1, 11 and 9 points. An average running game (3.9 per carry) and caretaker Drew Stanton making enough plays to win the past two weeks. The difference: The Cards’ defense is so much better than anyone thought it would be, holding foes to 2.9 yards per rush and a 57% completion rate.

Not at all, actually. I think quite a few people thought the Cardinals would have a good defense. But yeah, you were wrong, so "anyone" was wrong too.

5. San Diego (2-1). Danny Woodhead is not a minor loss.

Oh good, so Chargers fans can feel good kno---

It’s a huge one

You got me again, Peter! Peter, when you do this it isn't a little annoying. It's really annoying.

But Philip Rivers has been so good over the past 13 months. I just trust him to handle the loss of his pass-catching running back to injury and move the receptions to someone else. My money is on Donald Brown,

That's a risky bet, Peter! What tipped it off? The fact Brown got 30 carries on Sunday?

Offensive Player of the Week 
 
Le’Veon Bell and LeGarrette Blount, running backs, Pittsburgh. With the Steelers’ season at a crucial early-season point because of an awful loss at Baltimore last week, Bell and Blount absolutely smoked the Panthers on Sunday night.

I see what you did there, Peter. You are being blunt in saying the Panthers were smoked by these two running backs. I just hope the Panthers season doesn't go to pot.

DeAndre Levy, linebacker, Detroit. Levy had 10 tackles, including the safety, and broke up two passes. As a playmaking outside ’backer with the size (238 pounds) to play inside, Levy has become almost as important to the Detroit D as the big guys up front—it’s just that no one knows it yet.

"No one" knows it yet. Only Peter, but "we" will figure it out. "We" will only have figured it out once Peter tells us Levy is just as important as the big guys up front because "we" can't know anything Peter doesn't know first.

This from a Marist/NBC poll of 606 adults, taken last week, on the state of the NFL today:

Twenty-nine percent believe Roger Goodell should be forced to resign—which, conversely, could be taken (and I am sure will be by the league) that Goodell has 71% job approval. That’s not what it says, though. The question was whether Goodell should be forced to resign, not whether he is doing a good job at running the NFL.

There is also a difference in being forced to resign and voluntarily choosing to resign. And yes, I think this 29% could be taken quite a few ways, but Peter naturally leans towards presenting it as a favorable result for Goodell.

Eighty-six percent say the current controversy will not change how much pro football they watch. Only 11% said they are likely to watch less of the NFL. (Three percent said it would make them watch more, oddly.)

Right, which is why Peter's fit last week about "Is the NFL worth watching still?" was just a horseshit knee jerk reaction. Few people, and especially a guy who makes his living off the NFL like Peter King, are going to stop watching NFL games due to players getting arrested for domestic violence.

Among southerners polled, 51% feel the kind of corporal punishment used by Adrian Peterson on his son is right.

I would love to know what "southerners" are and where they are from. I would find it interesting to know this.

Jose Altuve is unbelievable...On another level of amazement: Look where Altuve, a Venezuelan toiling in anonymity in Houston, stands versus some of the best players in major league history when you compare the best season for hits that each one of these players had

NO ONE had heard of Altuve until Peter King just alerted baseball fans to his existence. "We" didn't even know how good he was!

Chip Kelly Wisdom of the Week

The Philadelphia coach, on offensive diversity:

I hope your brain can handle the wisdom about to spill forth.

How do you want to defend us? Doesn’t matter. If there’s a matchup we can exploit, we’ll exploit it. We don’t have a set number [of touches] that this needs to go here, this needs to go here. A lot of times, it’s different guys, different games. And one game it’s one guy, another game, it’s another guy. So it’s not by design that we are trying to go one way or another way … In the four years [at Oregon], one year the leading receiver was a wide receiver, one year it was a tight end and one year it was a running back. Here is what happened at Oregon. We were up 50 points in a lot of games, so we threw the ball less than ever. And I had that question last year a thousand times that you really emphasize the run. Well, when the score is 50‑3 at halftime, we are not coming out in the second half and jacking the ball around.

Chip Kelly doesn't say a certain player needs a certain set of touches and if he is up 47 points he will stop throwing the ball. Pure wisdom.

I hope our running backs carry the ball more than we throw the ball this year in every single game, because if they do, that means we are winning every single game.”

This would be an amazing quote if almost every other NFL coach didn't feel the same way. I really think Peter needs to think more about his Chip Kelly wisdom every week. They aren't bad quotes, but they are also not as enlightening as Peter seems to think they are.

Walking back from Central Park around noon Saturday, I spied a crazy-long line outside the Apple Store on Fifth Avenue. The line weaved in a maze of crowd-control stanchions, hundreds of people in the maze, and at the end of the maze, the line went east down 59^th Street, a full city block to Madison Avenue.
It wasn’t too tough to guess what it was for—the rollout of the iPhone 6. I asked one of the security dudes: “How long a wait if I went to the end of the line right now?”

So I went to the end of the line and asked a couple of young guys, 20 or 23, waiting with their heads in their iPhone 5s, “Did you know you’ve got about a six-hour wait in front of you? That’s what the security guy told me.”

Of course Peter has to antagonize these two guys. Because Peter isn't satisfied simply knowing that he doesn't have to wait in line for a new phone because he'll get his free phone in a timely fashion from one of his employers when he wants to upgrade his current phone. It seems Peter has an issue with minding his own business. What's the purpose of going up and starting a conversation with these two guys? To rub it in they have a long wait? Obviously they know they have a long wait, so other than talking to them in order to have an anecdote for MMQB speaking to them in order to remind them of their long wait serves no purpose.

“They told us it was about five,” one of the guys said.
Well, that certainly makes all the difference.

Stop being condescending. It makes you sound like an elitist asshole to go up and antagonize two people choosing to wait in line for the iPhone 6. Maybe you wouldn't choose to spend your time doing this, but they have, so mind your own damn business.

It annoys me when Peter will comment on what other people choose to do. Let people live and quit staring at them while they are in public and commenting on their actions.

Ten Things I Think I Think

1. I think this is what I liked about Week 3:

a. Nate Irving, stoning one of the toughest short-yardage backs in football, Marshawn Lynch, at the goal line on the Seahawks’ first series.

Peter thinks the Panthers certainly didn't stone Blount and Bell on Sunday evening. Those guys weren't stoned at all.

q. Russell Wilson, with the game on the line.

Does Russell Wilson feel any pressure at all? Ever? No matter what happens from now on in his career, his 2+  years of playing quarterback for the Seahawks will have him as considered elite. He's up there with Manning and Brady.

2. I think this is what I didn’t like about Week 3:

b. You paid Evan Dietrich-Smith to play like that, Tampa?

No Peter, in a complete turn of events Dietrich-Smith paid Tampa Bay for the honor of playing for them.

d. Danny Woodhead going off on a cart in Buffalo. One of my favorite players to watch—just gets so much out of his talent.

This was not a minor loss. It was a huge loss.

m. I don’t know whether I like it or don’t like it, but those pool shots in Jacksonville are just strange.

Considering this is under the "Things I didn't like about Week 3" then I would say you didn't like this. I'm glad you need help clarifying your own feelings on this subject.

4. I think it’s stunning to think this. But in light of the investigation of sexual assault against him, and in light of his shoplifting incident, and in light of his incredibly vulgar outburst while standing on a table (!) in front of scores of Florida State students, and in light of the NFL being on fire over its handling of domestic violence, and in light of any move by an NFL team to add a player with a history of misogyny, I think it’s possible that whenever Jameis Winston enters the draft—in either 2015 or 2016—there’s a good chance he will not be a first-round pick.

I think what's stunning is it is currently September and Peter King is claiming there is a good chance Jameis Winston won't be a first round pick almost eight months from now. It's ridiculous really. This from the guy who bitched and whined in April about how the NFL Draft coverage is so saturated. He doesn't mind talking and speculating about the draft in September, but it's everyone else's fault the draft coverage is saturated in late April.

To claim Winston is not a first round pick is insane. It's September. If Florida State goes undefeated and Winston plays well over the rest of the season or takes the Johnny Manziel Tour of Redemption during the draft process he will most certainly be a first round pick. But no, Peter thinks it's worth reporting in September there is a good chance Winston won't be a first round pick in May. It's not like NFL teams talk themselves into taking quarterbacks in the first round or anything.

If I’m an NFL GM, it would scare the heck out of me. If I’m the wife of an NFL GM—or owner—thinking of drafting Winston, I’m asking some pointed questions.

If I'm an adult who covers the NFL for a living then I would know talk like that is very common inside the locker room.

6. I think if you’re waiting for me to call for Roger Goodell to be fired, you’ll have to wait a while.

I'm not waiting for you to do anything, Peter. In fact, I could care less what you say or think on the issue. It's not like what you say suddenly becomes the ruling line of thought. So if you are waiting for me to care what you think, you'll have to wait a while.

I’m not into mob rule either.

Yes, you are not into mob rule. Especially when it comes to Roger Goodell. Let's wait for all of the facts to show themselves. There's no rush to judgment here, because Peter will let others do that. He's gotta save his moral outrage for things like bad tasting coffee and people who talk on their cell phones in public. Otherwise, when it comes to NFL players, Peter proved last week that he doesn't mind being the great moral arbiter of our time. Now those players who commit domestic violence, people will go hard on them, but not ol' Roger Goodell. Peter is still waiting for someone to find out what exactly Goodell knew and didn't know about that Ray Rice elevator tape, because clearly Peter is done investigating this. At this point, he may find out something that would hurt his relationship with the NFL commissioner and that just can't happen.

I strongly believe that on Friday he should have clarified what he meant when he told Christine Brennan of USA Today that the evidence from the video of Rice punching his fiancée in the Atlantic City elevator “was not consistent with what was described when we met with Ray and his representatives.” That will be a key component of the Mueller report. ESPN and the New York Daily News both reported Rice was unequivocal about what he told Goodell, that he struck Janay Palmer with his hand and knocked her backward in the elevator, causing her to lose consciousness. Goodell had two chances Friday to clarify that simple point, and he should have—among other issues he should have been more forthcoming about to a nation starving for news on this important issue.

By "clarifying," I'm assuming Peter means "stop lying about what you were told" or "explain how what wasn't consistent about what you were told, because it sounds like you knew exactly what happened."

7. I think, if you want to know the difference between Ray McDonald and Jonathan Dwyer in terms of why one is playing and why one has been banished when neither has had his day in court, it is not complicated. McDonald met with the Niners and said he was not guilty of attacking his fiancée. The team, after some investigating of its own, believes McDonald’s story. Dwyer denied to the Cardinals much of the substance of the charges against him—that he head-butted his wife, causing her a broken nose. But in the course of looking into the story, the team discovered that Dwyer had threatened suicide multiple times.

Wait, so the 49ers believed McDonald's story? Is that all Carolina or Minnesota had to say to get the media off their ass for not initially suspending Greg Hardy and Adrian Peterson for the season? So if the team claims they believe the player, then Peter sees no issue with continuing to allow that player to participate in practice and games. I'm also a little confused how Dwyer also denies the claims against him, but because he has threatened suicide multiple times then he has to be lying.

The team had four choices: release Dwyer, let him continue to play, de-activate him each week, or place him on the non-football-injury list. That list would allow Dwyer to get medical and psychiatric care to determine the extent of his troubles. The Cardinals chose the NFI list. Dwyer can’t play for the Cardinals this year but would be allowed to sign with another team.

Oh, so the real difference has nothing to do with domestic violence, but has everything to do with Dwyer's mental health?

That was a nice escape clause Arizona had, because keeping Dwyer on the team might have been a media circus.

But again, Peter agrees with this decision, not because the Cardinals did "the right thing" and avoided a media circus, but for Dwyer's mental health. How come I don't believe this? Was it impossible for Dwyer to play and still get medical and psychiatric care? I just wonder because it seems like the real difference in these two situations is the 49ers believe McDonald's story and the Cardinals don't believe Dwyer's story.

10. I think these are my non-NFL thoughts of the week:

a. My best to the family of Dave Rahn, former 49ers PR man, who died of melanoma Thursday. Dave was a good, good man with a terrific work ethic, and he was as professional a person as I’ve dealt with in this business. Rest in peace, Dave.
b. I’ve had two significant melanoma surgeries, and it’s nothing to fool around with. Sunscreen and regular checkups are the only way to beat it—or to compete with it.

Why is this consist of two different points? They are related to the same topic, just combine them into one point.

i. Ran the 6.2-mile Central Park loop, with the half-mile hill I dread, in 59:23 Saturday. Now that’s a sentence I never thought I’d write, running that course in less than an hour. Last week I cut off the toughest mile on the run, the northern hill at the top of the park, and substituted that mile with a run on the flat streets of midtown Manhattan. On Saturday, I included the hill. Glad I did—but I paid for it when I woke up Sunday.

Thanks for the update. You know, interest in reading MMQB also means we are interested in you as a person as well.

The Adieu Haiku

Russell Wilson wins.
He just does. No dazzling stats.
Low maintenance too.

Gee, why had you not mentioned this before this haiku? I'm glad this haiku exists because I needed the information that had been mentioned three other times in MMQB to be written at least one more time.