5 comments MMQB Review: In This MMQB Featuring Mostly Combine News, Peter Wonders Why Football Fans are Combine-Nutty

Peter King went play-by-play of the Patriots' fourth quarter comeback in the Super Bowl win against the Seahawks in last week's MMQB. He also did a little Josh McDaniels/Tom Brady fan fiction and explained why he would quit the Pro Football Hall of Fame committee if Darren Sharper weren't considered on the ballot. It's still strange how strongly Peter caped up for Sharper, but Peter never really understand why others found it odd. This week Peter previews the combine, talks about how EVERYONE makes too big deal of the combine and then makes a big deal out of it himself, and discusses the roosters in Key West. Peter also discusses how people on Twitter are mean, which seems to be a popular thing for sportswriters to talk about these days, just how mean everyone on Twitter is. Meanwhile, those people that Peter hates on Twitter are the same people who read his columns on a weekly basis. It's tough when your fans are the assholes you don't like.

Over the past decade or so, since the NFL combine has gotten so much traction in this football-crazed country, I always think of combine week as the beginning of the new season.

It’s always amazed me how combine-nutty so many people inside and outside the sport are.

This is called "looking a gift horse in the mouth." If some people weren't combine-nutty then there may be no need for a web site called "THE MMQB" and Peter King would just be a haughty, self-involved sportswriter who isn't nearly as successful and famous as he is now. Peter would take most of February through May off from writing about football, perhaps taking a pay cut or have to focus on other sports he doesn't like as much, if he didn't get the chance to be so amazed at how combine-nutty some people inside and outside the sport are.

And of course, after mentioning how amazed he is at how combine-nutty so many people inside and outside the sport are, Peter will of course spend a lot of this MMQB talking about the combine. He will also have Mike Mayock give comments about prospects and how they will perform at the combine. It's amazing how combine-nutty people are, but it certainly makes for a good topic to discuss in MMQB. I just can't wait to find out which player Mayock will drop from #1 at his position to out of the top 5 of that position based on one bad workout. Which player will Mayock ignore all of his other impressions of in favor of making a knee-jerk reaction?

But ratings and the audience were up 60 percent in 2014 over 2010 numbers on NFL Network, and the ratings have climbed on ESPN too.

I wonder if the ratings for the combine have increased as talk about how popular the combine has become has increased? Basically what I'm saying is the NFL media talks about the combine more than they used to, so is this the result of an increased interest in the combine or is the increased awareness of the combine result in an increased interest? Is the media helping to drive this interest in the combine by increasing awareness of when the event takes place and how it can be viewed?

The other day I asked NFL Network draft guru Mike Mayock, the cornerstone combine expert in the business, why he thinks the four-day event has become such an extravaganza.

Peter says people are combine-nutty and then he refers to Mike Mayock as a "combine expert." Okay, then. I guess there is such thing as a person being an expert on the combine.

“So, I thought people would never watch it. But with that as a backdrop, I think there’s three things that have gotten people into it over the years. One: There’s a crossover audience, of college football fans and pro football fans. The college football fans want to see how their guys are doing matched up against the best guys from around the country.

Quick update. Jameis Winston sneezed prior to throwing a pass and it went off-target. Mike Mayock has dropped Winston down in his rankings to where he'll be surprised if Winston gets drafted.

Two: NFL fans, especially fantasy football fans, want to compare one receiver to another, or one quarterback to another. I’m amazed how much I hear that from fans.

Really? This is a real thing? I wouldn't ever imagine the combine could be used for fantasy football purposes. Combine results would seem to be completely useless as it pertains to fantasy football and people are idiots, so maybe that does make sense.

Another update. Todd Gurley's neck size isn't ideal for a running back, so Mike Mayock has dropped Gurley to 10th in his running back rankings and moved a running back into his top 5 who has ideal neck size, but hasn't actually scored a touchdown during a college football game.

Three: I think people love to see players without helmets and pads on. To see a 270-pound man run a 4.6 40-yard dash, viscerally, is a really cool thing to see.”

Another bad break for Todd Gurley. Mayock now projects him to be drafted in the 5th or 6th round because, while everything looks good on tape, Mayock remembers now that he saw one practice when Gurley was at the University of Georgia where Gurley fumbled and didn't look sharp.

I asked Mayock for the storylines he’ll be watching.

WHY ARE PEOPLE SO COMBINE-NUTTY?

Meanwhile, Peter is creating "storylines" for the combine.

1. Who will challenge Chris Johnson’s combine-record 4.24-second 40-yard dash?

Sammie Coates, Auburn, 6-2, 213. “Biggest of the three, a real specimen,” said Mayock. “I don’t think he catches the ball as naturally as the other two. I want to see how naturally he can catch it.”

Who cares if he can catch the football? He's a receiver, all he has to do is run fast. Also, if Mayock sees at the combine that Coates catches the ball well, sees on tape that Coates doesn't catch the ball well and then at his Auburn Pro Day Coates only catches the ball so-so, will Mayock's head explode because he doesn't know which set of information to overvalue?

3. Who are the boom-or-bust guys in this draft?

Phillips, for one. Said Mayock: “Back surgery two years ago, only started 16 games in college, but he’s a dancing bear,

It doesn't seem fair that a dancing bear could participate at the combine. Though I'm sure Mike Mayock would be really intrigued by a horse that can run a fast 40-yard dash and had a great shuttle time, but probably would wonder if the horse could catch the ball naturally.

Then there’s the “poster child for boom or bust—Dorial Green-Beckham,” Mayock said. Green-Beckham played two seasons at Missouri, was arrested on marijuana charges twice at Missouri, was dismissed from the team in April 2014, transferred to Oklahoma, was not granted eligibility for the 2014 season, then declared for the draft last month. At 6-5 and 225 pounds, he can run a 4.4 40-yard dash, and some team just might risk a low first-round pick on him. “I watched every target to him in 2013, and he has no idea what he’s doing,

Yeah, but is he fast and is he a dancing bear? Who cares if Green-Beckham has no idea what he's doing? At the very least Mike Mayock can just ogle his body for a few minutes and dream of what Green-Beckham could do if he actually knew how to play football.

but he changes games,” said Mayock.

Mostly Green-Beckham changes games because once he's declared ineligible or kicked off the team, then the opposing team knows they don't have to game plan for him. I would look for the Patriots to be connected to Green-Beckham about 1000 times until the draft happens under the guise that "Belichick and Brady will know how to deal with Green-Beckham." Also, I think the Seahawks will probably be linked to Green-Beckham too, because after all (says the media) they dealt with Marshawn Lynch so Green-Beckham wouldn't be so hard to deal with. Pete Carroll is a player's coach, he'll get through to Green-Beckham.

5. A chance to see through the fog at quarterback.

Mayock: “It’s not a good quarterback class. I’m scared to death of Jameis Winston off the field,

Because he is black? That's racist.

and I’m scared to death of how many interceptions he throws. He threw seven interceptions against Louisville and Florida, and could have been 12 or 13 if the other teams could catch the ball.

Winston also threw fewer interceptions during his freshman year. I guess that doesn't count since Mayock is usually overly-focused on what JUST HAPPENED and nothing before that.

But most quarterbacks come out of the spread now, and they’re projections, like Marcus Mariota. I love so much about Mariota, but he is a projection. I’m much more comfortable projecting Winston, even with the interceptions, because he was a pocket guy at Florida State. And his ability to win games in the second half is mind-boggling.”

So the lesson to be learned here is that if you are a quarterback, it's better to sort of be bad at throwing from the pocket, as opposed to not really throwing from the pocket as much, because it makes it easier to evaluate you. Also, every quarterback is a projection in some sense, it's just a quarterback coming from the spread has to be evaluated in a different fashion.

As for who’s number three, Mayock says, at least today, that would be UCLA’s Brett Hundley or Baylor’s Bryce Petty. “I have significant concerns about both of them,” he said. “I like Petty’s arm, accuracy and size, but he has no idea how to play in the pocket, from what I saw.”

And whereas a guy like Green-Beckham or Coates is intriguing to Mayock because they don't know how to play their position well and need further coaching, Bryce Petty isn't a good prospect because he doesn't know how to play his position well and needs further coaching. The lesson here is that if you don't know how to play your college position well, then just be athletic and it will be assumed you can learn. If you are not athletic, then it's assumed you have no chance of being taught to play your college position better.

Mayock likes comparing players he’s seeing now to players he’s seen in the past.

WHY HASN'T ANYONE ELSE THOUGHT OF DOING THIS?

It should be an illuminating week in Indianapolis. For The MMQB, I’ll be there, along with Jenny Vrentas, Robert Klemko and Emily Kaplan, and videographer John DePetro. Andy Staples also will be there, working on a couple of things for The MMQB, SI and SI.com. And photographer Todd Rosenberg will be with us, capturing the players and the flavor of the combine. Follow along here, and on Instagram and Twitter.

Right Peter? Everyone is so combine-crazy these days. Why is that? I'm just glad that Peter doesn't mention how everyone is combine-crazy and then seem to saturate THE MMQB with coverage of the combine or else it would seem like he was part of the media that is helping to make fans of the NFL to be combine-crazy.

Dave Goldberg died last week at 73. There’s a good chance you didn’t know Goldberg, even if you were a big football fan. That’s because, most often, Goldberg’s best stories would appear in your hometown newspaper without his name on them, because he wrote for the Associated Press. Such as this preview of the Super Bowl 27 years ago:

SAN DIEGO (AP)—For the second straight year, the Super Bowl comes down to John Elway against the world, the world this year being the Washington Redskins rather than the New York Giants. Is there anyone else on the Broncos besides their quarterback?

That’s called “foreshadowing.” Goldberg was good at that.

But for years, and through the 25 years he was the AP’s lead pro football writer (1984-2009), Dave Goldberg and his APbrethren were my news feed for the NFL. I knew he would give me the facts I needed to know, laced with some smart leanings, but never a hit-over-the-head opinion, because that’s not what wire services did. They reported facts. Then you decided what you thought about the facts.

I have absolutely no issue with what Dave Goldberg wrote, but I wouldn't call writing "Is there anyone else on the Broncos besides their quarterback?" to be anything but a hit-over-the-head opinion. It's a pretty strong opinion, even if it were true. That sentence is not a fact and it's a strong opinion. So Peter picked an interesting example to show how Goldberg reported facts and not opinions.

Remember those days?

Says the guy who writes a weekly column which prominently features his opinion. This is typical Peter King. He longs for the days when sportwriting didn't have opinion in it, but he of course doesn't mind giving some opinion on his sportswriting. This is another in a long line of Peter's "Do as I wish could be done but I won't do" statements he has made over the year. Most of them usually start with "I don't want to..." followed by Peter doing exactly what he stated he didn't want to do.

As he got older, Goldberg became one of the wise owls in the Pro Football Hall of Fame selection meetings. Unemotional, fact-based, very smart. He wouldn’t rail at much, really. But he did not like clichés. At all. Such as this one: future Hall of Famer. “Future Hall of Famer,” he’d grouse. “If every guy who was a future Hall of Famer became a real Hall of Famer, we’d have to put 50 guys in every year!”

I bet Goldberg would hate it if someone wrote something like,

For the second straight year, the Super Bowl comes down to John Elway against the world,

He would grouse at that and then talk about how writing like this is silly.

Dr. Elizabeth Nabel, appointed by the NFL last Monday to be the league’s first chief health and medical adviser overseeing all league medical affairs, will be at the combine to meet with the league’s various medical committees and trainers and executives.

See? The NFL cares about their players!

One immediate focus for Nabel, at least in the eyes of fans and teams, will be to examine the league’s concussion-diagnosis protocols and see if the NFL has it right. In the Patriots’ Super Bowl victory, Julian Edelman returned to play despite appearing shaken up after a fourth-quarter collision. He has declined comment about it since the game, including to The New York Times on Sunday. But with the emphasis on head trauma and long-term effects of hits to the head, there should be a crystal-clear policy on when players can return, and what precisely constitutes a concussion or a hit severe enough to bar a player from returning to a game. The policy has gotten better, but the cloudiness of the Edelman story makes it obvious the league still has a job to finish there.

And of course it wouldn't be an NFL hire if there wasn't just a small bit of a conflict of interest. So is Nabel going to point out how the Patriots should have sat Edelman IF he had a concussion given her ties to Robert Kraft? Maybe, maybe not. It wouldn't be the NFL though if there wasn't some sense they had rigged the game in one small way or another.

A Tweetup, for those who haven’t been to one, is an informal meeting of people who, theoretically, have encountered one another on Twitter. For the past six years in Indianapolis, some of my readers/followers/hecklers have come to a public place or bar when the combine is in town, and I’ve brought some of my media friends, and we talk football for a while. This year, we’re changing things up a bit.

Where: Sun King Brewing Co., 135 North College Ave., Indianapolis (about seven blocks from downtown).  

When: Friday, 7:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m.
 

Tickets: $10. Yes, this used to be free. We decided to charge this year, with all ticket money going to Thrive360 (formerly Kids Against Hunger of Central Indiana), a group that packs meals for the needy and the hungry. You must be 21 or older to attend. Beer will be sold at the event. Buy your tickets here.

So yes, you would have to pay to Tweetup with Peter. But all of the money goes to charity and it's better to just make people pay to speak with Peter King himself rather than ask those who attend the Tweetup to make a donation to Thrive360. Because people are terrible and would never donate to abuse the great privilege of getting to speak with Peter for free.

“I was told I wouldn’t be the coach any more, and then … You can call it mutual. I mean, I wasn’t going to put the 49ers in a position to have a coach they didn’t want anymore. But that’s the truth of it. I didn’t leave the 49ers. I felt like the 49er hierarchy left me.”

—Former 49ers coach Jim Harbaugh on “The TK Show” podcast with San Jose Mercury News columnist Tim Kawakami, on Friday.

Man, I hope Harbaugh's new contract he signed with Michigan just days after being forced against his will to not coach the 49ers anymore has a Kleenex stipend. He's going to need it. I'm sure Jim Harbaugh had absolutely NOTHING to do with his not being the 49ers' head coach anymore. They just got rid of him for no reason. He wasn't causing trouble, having a contentious relationship with Trent Baalke or putting out feelers for another job. The 49ers were just being big meanies.

I am not purposely advocating for Peyton Manning here,

Upon Peter writing this sentence, the only thing that can be known for sure is that he is going to come off as purposely advocating for Peyton Manning here.

but I am going to come down on one side of a question beginning to get some attention in Denver: Should Peyton Manning, who will be 39-and-a-half years old on opening day, take a pay cut from his scheduled $19 million salary in 2015 to stay a Bronco?

And of course Peter will say "no" because he likes Peyton Manning.

Those who would say yes would point to the fact that Manning looked 49-and-a-half down the stretch of the season, when he was plagued by leg injuries. And when you age, you are susceptible to getting hurt more.

OR...Peter could not misstate the opposition's point of view and say that those who say "yes" would have this point of view because the Broncos have several important free agents on the offensive side of the ball who they currently may not be able to afford. If Peyton Manning wants another ring then having the best offensive players possible (or a Pro Bowler at every starting skill position as it seems to require sometimes) is the best way to do this. So if Manning wants Julius and/or Demaryius Thomas back, then he may need to take a pay cut to get another Super Bowl ring.

Those who would say no, like me, would use this statistic for evidence:

Touchdown pass leaders since 2012 1. Peyton Manning (131)
2. Drew Brees (115)
3. Aaron Rodgers (94)
4. Tony Romo (93)
5. Tom Brady (92)

There is only one quarterback, then, within 35 touchdown passes of Manning since he began playing for the Broncos in 2012.

I don't think there is an argument that Peyton Manning hasn't earned (in terms of the NFL) the ability to make $19 million for the 2015 season. Peter is misstating the opposition's argument. The argument is that Manning needs good players around him that the Broncos may not be able to afford if he doesn't offer them some cap relief. Manning may want another Super Bowl ring, but there is an argument to be made that allowing the Broncos to put good players around him for another run is the best way to help this second Super Bowl ring happen. Of course, Manning wouldn't be selfish for refusing to take a pay cut to allow the Broncos to fit in players around him, even knowing that these players would be there after Manning has retired. He also wouldn't get any criticism for not taking a pay cut. Who wants to take a pay cut even if meant increasing the chances of another Super Bowl ring?

Sam Bradford’s salary cap number in 2015 is $2.58 million more than Tom Brady’s. According to Spotrac, Bradford’s number is $16.58 million (which the Rams are intent on lowering); Brady, $14 million.

I only add this because as I was laid up in bed this week with a stomach virus I heard some talking head on ESPN talk about how "This is the year Sam Bradford needs to prove he can be counted on and stay healthy." How many years does he get? He can be a really good quarterback, but he's played in seven games over the last two seasons. At a certain point, the Rams need to move the fuck on from him. He's injury-prone, but talented. Evaluate him accordingly, but don't act like he gets more time to prove himself. He has to prove he can stay healthy and it should be assumed by the Rams he will not be healthy until proven otherwise. How many years is he going to be allowed the benefit of the doubt that he can stay healthy?

Mr. Starwood Preferred Member Travel Note of the Week

I’d never been to Key West before spending four days there last week with my wife. Cool place. Nobody ever told me about the roosters, though.

I guess those people that Peter spoke with about going to Key West just assumed given the fact he uses the words "precocious" and likes to infantilize grown men that Peter had previous knowledge of all the cocks in Key West.

Did you know that the place is crawling with roosters?

I think we are speaking the same code here with me calling them cocks. Yes Peter, I did know there were a lot of "roosters" down there in Key West. I've never visited, but it's well-known that some married men like to visit Key West and go visit the "roosters" at night while their wives are asleep. Key West is a beautiful area and there are a lot of roosters, but they peck so it's probably best to go see the roosters alone at night without the wife. If you know what I mean, based on the code we are talking right now. Key West does have a reputation for being a very rooster friendly city, so it is a bit shocking to someone who hasn't heard of this reputation, and I think I know what you are talking about. Very precocious of you, Peter, though I am afraid others may crack the code. There's nothing wrong with visiting the roosters, but plans must be made to tell others why you were visiting the roosters just in case you get caught IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

The first night there, in the wee hours, I heard a strange noise. It woke me up. Pitch-dark out, about 4:45 a.m. Cock-a-doodle-doo! Over, and over, and over again.

Yes, many men go down to Key West and feel the roosters calling them in the middle of the night. It's a precocious sound I have heard, which I know is something that would appeal to Peter.

One morning it was raining, and they weren’t out in force then. But every other morning, before 5, a few of them just went off.

The bars close later down there in Key West, so the roosters will probably be a little more loud at that point in the morning.

They just walk around town. Everywhere.

Yes, they do. It's Key West. What's wrong with roosters walking everywhere? I feel like the code is now falling apart.

Went to the Hog’s Breath Saloon early one evening, and there were two on the sidewalk outside the place.

Again, there isn't anything wrong with this. Did you alert the roosters accidentally that you wanted to come try and pet them later or something? Were you concerned that the roosters would be denied entrance to the bar because they were overly-precocious and not...um...adult enough of a rooster to get into the bar? If so, it's probably best you stay away from them or they will bite you, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

On Duval Street, at the Ernest Hemingway House, in the parking lot of the 7-Eleven … everywhere.

Yes, it must have been hard to go there with a loved one and deal with so many roosters everywhere. I do think maybe Peter and I aren't talking about the same thing and he isn't referring to trolling Key West for young men, but I can't be sure.

Anyone criticizing Jameis Winston's body needs to look at Peyton Manning.
— Matt Miller (@nfldraftscout) February 14, 2015

The Bleacher Report draft analyst, after an unflattering picture of Jameis Winston (who looked a bit overweight) popped up Saturday.

I don't think the picture of Winston is a huge deal either, but to be fair, Winston is in his early 20's and Peyton Manning is in his late 30's. If Winston was getting fat now then it doesn't bode well for how well he stays in shape once he starts to get paid and gets older. But yes, it is a non-issue, though there is a difference in a quarterback not being in great shape and visibly being out of shape.

the daily show with marshawn lynch
— andy levy (@andylevy) February 11, 2015

Now there’s one no one else thought of in the past few days.

I only read this like five different places. "No one" thought of it though.

Ten Things I Think I Think

1. I think Roger Goodell would be a more popular commissioner—and God knows he needs to work on that this offseason—if he told the league’s compensation committee: “Just pay me $10 million next year.”

Nope, he would be slightly less unpopular. If Roger Goodell displayed some self-awareness or ability to not sound like he was pulling something over on NFL fans then he could perhaps become more popular.

A man should be able to earn what he is worth in this country; far be it from me to limit what a person can fairly be paid. 

Which means Peter is now going to try and limit what a person can fairly be paid. It's as if on cue. 

But to me, Goodell’s earnings package is tone-deaf. Being compensated exactly double what the NFL MVP, Peyton Manning, made in 2013 ($15 million in salary, $2.5 million in pro-rated bonus, $17.5 million total) is just another reason for enmity to rise in those who think Goodell’s done precious little to earn it—whether he has or not.

And here we go. Often (nearly all the time) the CEO or President of a company makes more than that company's highest-paid or most valuable employee earns. It's just how life works.

2. I think Packers fans who saw their season tickets rise in price for the sixth straight year last week will renew through gritted teeth. But it’s a pretty good deal, if you ask me, to sit in the 30th row at the 45-yard line at Lambeau for $1,050 per season, for the 10 games. Of course, fans shouldn’t have to pay full price for the two preseason games, but that’s another matter.

Actually, that's very much a part of the matter. Fans shouldn't have to pay for two exhibition games they have no interest in seeing. Raising ticket prices for six straight years also means that Packers fans are paying more for two preseason games they have no interest in for the sixth straight year. So the two preseason games are tied into the season ticket cost because it would be $210 cheaper for the eight games the fans are really wanting to see.

4. I think the Broncos definitely want Manning back for 2015. Take that to the bank.

I don't believe it. So Peter is reporting the Broncos definitely want Manning back for 2015? Why on Earth would they want one of the best quarterbacks of all-time who is still performing at a high level back for next season? I'm glad I can take this to the bank, because it seemed sort of obvious to me.

Now, if they want to lower Manning’s cap number, that would be easy to do—by putting, for example, some of his $19 million salary in a guaranteed bonus. But to me, Manning making $21.5 million on the Denver cap—15 percent of the Broncos’ 2015 total cap—is not excessive. And if I were Elway, I wouldn’t push very much into 2016 or beyond, knowing this very well could be Manning’s last season in Denver.

And of course, because Manning has thrown a lot of touchdown passes over the past few years then it doesn't even make sense to ask him to take a pay cut of some sort.

You don’t want to carry a lot of dead money that will hurt your ability to manage a cap well down the road.

True and you also don't want to not ask Peyton Manning to take a pay cut so that you can keep a player or two that you would like to keep down the road once Manning is retired. There's that too.

6. I think that was smart of Mike McCarthy in Green Bay, to divest himself of play-calling duties and hand them to Tom Clements. McCarthy still will have his fingerprints all over the offensive game plan, and surely he’ll hang on to the ability to overrule Clements if he doesn’t like a call. One of the things Jason Garrett found in Dallas last season, in ceding play-calling on offense, was that it gave him more of a chance to be the coach of 53 players, not just the 25 (give or take a few) on offense. McCarthy needs to be more involved on special teams, where the Packers were a disaster last year.

Yes, it makes sense for McCarthy to be less involved in the offense so that he has more time to become the head coach of the entire Packers team and get more involved in special teams. It sounds like McCarthy would be trading divesting himself of offensive play-calling only to get invested in special teams. Wouldn't this affect his ability to be the coach of 53 players as well?

7. I think the Vikings appear to be laying out the red carpet (purple carpet?) for Adrian Peterson to return to the team. Co-owner Mark Wilf and COO Kevin Warren both have said they would welcome back Peterson once he finishes his NFL-mandated discipline; Peterson is suspended until at least April 15. But it’s too soon to say Peterson will be back in purple. He’s been open in saying he’s not sure if he wants to return, and if spring comes around and he tells the club he thinks it would be better if they split, it’ll be interesting to see how they respond. As a free agent, Peterson would be in solid demand, I would think. Dallas would be the leader in the clubhouse, if DeMarco Murray is not franchised and his price tag is too high for the cap-strapped Cowboys.

Maybe I'm underestimating DeMarco Murray's value, but I can't imagine how Adrian Peterson would sign with the Cowboys for significantly less money than Murray would get on the free agent market. All things being equal, Peterson > Murray. If Murray's price tag is too high for the Cowboys, I just don't see how Adrian Peterson's price tag would not be as well.

8. I think it comes through loud and clear in Jim Harbaugh’s interview with Tim Kawakami that, right or wrong, Harbaugh thinks Jim Tomsula lobbied for the job and/or wasn’t loyal to him before the end of the 2014 season. We’ll see how that fares with Harbaugh loyalists who are left behind, but it bears watching.

From what little I know about Jim Tomsula, I can't imagine he was working behind the scenes for Harbaugh's job. That seems like a more devious plan of action than Tomsula is capable of. Of course, he may have gotten caught lobbying for the job because he's not devious enough, so maybe he was lobbying for the head coaching job and it didn't matter how well-known it was. 

10. I think these are my non-football thoughts of the week:

a. I don’t care what the investigation or the investigators in Chapel Hill, N.C., will say about the case of a man in a condo complex shooting three Muslim students, all in the head, all in cold-blooded murder. I will find it next-to-impossible to believe that one human can murder three humans in a dispute over a parking space.

This coming from a guy who almost got into a fistfight with a guy over an elevator spot at a hotel and has named his weekly travel note after the guy he almost got into a fight with. Murder is a HUGE step up, but it just takes a little bit more of crazy to go from almost getting into a fistfight over an elevator spot to shooting a person over a parking spot. It's hard to believe a triple murder is over a parking space, but Peter has a history of getting hostile with others in public, so if Peter were a crazy, hateful person... 

b. Interesting story in The New York Times about the damage a dumb and racially insensitive Tweet did to a woman’s life—and about how so many people took delight in publicly shaming this woman they didn’t know.

c. Such a surprise, people on Twitter piling on someone.

It wasn't like she Tweeted one thing that was insensitive. There were multiple Tweets that failed the "Is it funny or is it offensive?" test. Plus, any person on Twitter who has their employer and is employed in the PR field has to know better. I read the Tweet, didn't see why it was funny and moved on. A lot of people like to shame others on Twitter, and I may have been guilty of it once or twice, but there is no need to pile on.

That being said, I didn't take this as a thing Twitter was piling on, but the attack of the PC police in Twitter form. She wasn't politically correct and made an unfunny joke, so she got attacked. I think it had less to do with Twitter than how any comment like that would gain traction on social media due to the PC police getting involved. This is why a lot of people don't put their employer on their Twitter profile by the way.

g. Wow: 13 three-pointers in a row for Stephen Curry. This guy is so smooth, so great, so easy to root for.

Peter doesn't care about or watch the NBA, but he thinks this Stephen Curry guy is probably the best basketball player over his lifetime, by which he means the last 20 years.

h. Happy 43rd birthday, Jerome Bettis. It’s your first one with the yellow coat.

I'm glad the Hall of Fame vote for Bettis from Peter seems completely unbiased and not because they are buddies. As always, be nice to sportswriters, smile a lot and play in a big market. You never know what accolades will come your way.

k. Coffeenerdness: The Tweeter who told me the tall Flat White is best—because more espresso is concentrated in smaller drink (two shots to a tall, three to a grande)—was absolutely right. So I have adjusted: Now I’ll go four shots in a grande. And you just couldn’t live without that news!

Addiction is a bitch. Well, addiction along with having way too much disposable income to spend on four shots in a coffee-flavored drink is a bitch.

l. Beernerdness: One of the fun things about Key West: The Hog’s Breath Saloon, with Rolling Rock in bottles. Knowing it might be one of the last times to enjoy a green Rock (the New Jersey brewery where much of the Rolling Rock bottle stock is produced will switch to cans only starting in April), I had three of them the other night. Brought back some great college memories—and memories of a having a few after Steelers training camp practices with the great Myron Cope.

Rolling Rock and roosters. It doesn't get much better than that. Ah, college.

m. Sad to see you go, Jon Stewart. The 2016 election just won’t be the same.

Where else can Peter go to hear his liberal-leaning fake news in a slightly comedic fashion? Other than the 2-3 other fake news shows that are comedic and lean to the left as well of course.

o. Really liked most of the Saturday Night Live 40th anniversary show last night. But you’re telling me Eddie Murphy couldn’t tell one joke?

It took them 20+ years to get his ass on stage. It may take another 20+ years, or take a movie he wants to promote, to get him to tell a joke while on stage. If Eddie Murphy really wanted to tell a joke then he could have just read his filmography over the last 15 years.

p. The good things: Debby Downer.

q. Miley Cyrus sounded great doing “Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover.”

r. Dana Carvey choppin’ broccoli.

s. Bill Murray doing anything. In this case, singing about the shark in Jaws.

t. Chris Farley was so funny, and is so missed.

Shouldn't all the good things be under one letter instead of spread out over five letters?

The Adieu Haiku
The scouting combine. Players in shorts. Though you don’t …
play football in shorts.

Every week Peter manages to find a way to write a more useless haiku. He even has to use unnecessarily ellipsis in order to push this haiku out.