Tuesday, February 10, 2009

17 comments Bill Simmons Pisses Me Off...Again

Please read the A-Rod post below, if you want to of course, but I had to comment. In his latest magazine column, which is not about the Celtics directly, so it of course has to do with Bill Simmons personally. He is talking about how he does not hate Kobe Bryant, blah, blah, blah and I don't care...until here:

But there's a huge difference between being perceived as a hater and actually hating someone. The hater gimmick sprung from the Internet, where bloggers and message-board posters rip people to shreds on a daily basis.

That's me! I am not sure the hater "gimmick" came from the Internet, I think it came many years before that when people held grudges against other teams. I distinctly recall not liking UNC, Minnesota Twins, and the Dallas Cowboys way before the Internet was invented by Al Gore.

It's a logical tactic: If you want to cause a splash, but you're not talented or funny and lack an interesting take, what's left? You attack.

I realize Bill Simmons has the intelligence of an earthworm (attacking!) but this hater gimmick is the fresh and interesting take that bloggers have. Instead of letting columnists just write whatever they want and get away with, bloggers have learned to respond. So basically the fresh take is the "gimmick" Bill complains about. He doesn't realize he has disproven his fresh take theory a sentence after he writes it, hence earthworm intelligence status has been bestowed on him.

I also want to add that Bill Simmons did have a fresh take 7 years ago, but now lacks the talent to ever improve upon his skill set and create a fresh take on any issue. So he resorts to stale jokes and writing about his favorite teams...over and over. Oh, and he also takes out vendettas in his columns everyonce in a while.

In my case, though I am sure my writing sucks, I am not a blogger to attack people or because I write without intelligence or don't have an interesting take on things. I write because I don't care to be a professional columnist. Maybe I am cocky, but if I wanted to be a columnist, I would have done it and been trained to do it well, but I didn't do that. Bill has taken the blogger stereotype (those who are too stupid or not funny to actually write have a blog) and just runs with it. Now THAT is a fresh take on bloggers.

Sorry for attacking him. Carry on to A-Rod if you wish.

17 comments:

Bengoodfella said...

One other thing. I find it ironic a guy who does not allow comments on his columns thinks he knows all about the evolution of haters and how blogs don't offer a fresh approach. If something I write is incorrect/sucks/stupid, everyone can tell me about it...It's an open forum and I find it interesting Bill doesn't offer that to his "fans."

Unknown said...

Blogs are one of the few things offering a fresh approach, hence thier rise in popularity. Also they have contributed to the demise of newspapers, and hopefully soon, the demise of overpaid hacks like Rick Rielly and Bill Simmons.

To take a recent example, the guys at Fire Joe Morgan retired their blog because they felt they had become redundant (redundent?...hmm, no redundant). In the past two years they had written a staggering amount of articles that were more amusing and informative than any article Rielly has done. Other then one or two efforts that looked like they were mailed in by the B-Team, they all were better at informing the public about the topic then what Rielly has done.

Simmons has had a couple decent articles, but even the ones that are mostly good he always has to stick a couple "WTF?" moments in them. He hasn't taken the Joe Boys graceful way out, nor improved his game any. HE's becoming more and more like Rielly everyday, but I'll at least give him that he doesn't appear to be mailing in his columns. Ok the ones for the Mag, yeah pretty much. He mentioned on his podcast recently that he basicly has to have the articles written 8 days ahead of time. That is a lousy way to get anything decent from someone like Simmons. The guys trying to write topical humor of a sports nature. 8 days lead time, might as well give up.

Strangely enough, I enjoy most of his podcasts, or at least most of the majority of his podcasts. Unlike most people, I enjoy the ones with his die hard Yankee fan Jack-O. Jack-O is a good fan. He knows what an intelligent, decently informed fan would know, and is cynic about listening to what the older then dirt writers say. The banter is entertaining. It's when Bill has guys like Marc Stein and Ric Bucher on that he becomes the moronic Bill we all know and dislike. You know, the one who wants to be Sports Czar AND the GM of the Milwaukee Bucks.

Unknown said...

I can't believe that I totally forgot to actually rip him for something in the article. He bitches about Kobe going 61/0/3, and it doesn't appear that he even watched the game. Gasol went 31/14/5. Kobe was playing almost the entire game on the perimeter while Gasol and Odom stayed deep in the paint against an undersized Knicks team. You'd think that Kobe would luck into a defensive rebound or two, but it didn't happen. Both he and Gasol were passing to other Lakers, but man, those guys couldn't throw a pea in the ocean, especially in the first half.

Gasol and Kobe went 31-48, while the rest of the team went 13-36. that might be one of the reasons Kobe kept calling for the ball. That and everytime he went toward the basket he got fouled, as the 20-20 at the line can attest. I might point out that LeBron took 33 shots in his game, yet according to Bill he did all of this in the flow of the offense. When the ball almost always starts with LeBron, it would probably seem that way, where as Kobe has to be passed the ball since the Lakers actually do use Fisher and Farmar as point guards.

Bill also implies Kobe was doing nothing more then padding his stats and hogging the ball at the end. Well, first off, the Lakers only won by 9 points, the Cavs by 5, so of course both stars were on the gloof to end the game. Kobe is also their best free throw shooter, so he is always the first option on the offense at the end of the game. What did Bill want Phil Jackson to do, pull Kobe? Let Trevor Ariza be the go to guy and be the man at the line to finish the game? He might not be a "hater" but he sure is biased.

The Casey said...

Bill Simmons: I hate Kobe, but I'm not a "hater". See? It's different!

Also, did anyone else see that they're going to play HORSE at the NBA All-Star Weekend? I bet Simmons is even more insufferable right now. I feel bad for the Sports Gal, if she's still there.

Unknown said...

Oh we aren't going to hear the end of this HORSE thing from Bill. He is going to take all the credit for it, but then when it turns out to be stupid, he will turn it around and say they did it wrong. Did anyone see the KICKS game they played at the Pro Bowl this year? Seriously, it might have been the stupidest thing ever. No one is going to find a game of HORSE interesting.

Whats next, a game of Around the World? Oh if that happens I'm taking all the credit for it! What about a game of 21? What other school yard games can we come up with?

How about a big game of dodgeball? Seriously, that would be something I would watch.

Bengoodfella said...

Oh, we are all just being haters because we are not funny and lack talent.

Martin, I would be shocked if Bill actually watched the Knicks game. I know he is a big NBA fan but I am pretty sure either the Clippers or the Celtics were playing at the same time.

I have intentionally ignored this H-O-R-S-E thing simply because I knew Simmons would gloat that he had invented it, but of course, his version was better. I am not sure we are ever hearing the end of that. If the Sports Gal is still around, then she has most likely tuned him out by now on this issue.

AJ, I have to admit I did not even watch anything related to the Pro Bowl this year. The only All Star Game I watch is the MLB All Star Game. They are too much like exhibition games. I did use to watch the NBA All Star weekend religiously and then all the stars decided they had better things to do than enter the events, so I quit. I think Brent Barry winning the Slam Dunk Contest was about it for me. Around the World would be about as interesting as H-O-R-S-E.

Now I could go for a game of dodgeball, that would be very interesting to me.

Unknown said...

Oh I dont watch any of the all star games either, besides baseball. I just happened to be flicking through the channels the other day and saw a thing called Pro Bowl Skill Challenge. I turned in for about 5 seconds and saw some kicking thing the same as HORSE but for kickers. They kick from different spots on the field and what not. For a minute I couldn't think why anyone would not be watching the Pro Bowl stuff, it was just so exciting to watch kickers kick a football.

Bengoodfella said...

I don't want to sound like I look down on anyone who watches those games. I just don't enjoy them very much. Though sometimes I miss something exciting, like when Sean Taylor blew up the Bills punter a few years ago. Kickers kicking the football from all over the field doesn't sound very exciting. I wish the NBA would just try to make the events more exciting and make the top players participate. I don't know what the NFL could do to make the Skills Competitions more exciting.

You are not by any chance a Detroit Lions fan are you?

Unknown said...

Trust me, it wasnt very exciting. In fact, i caught the end of it and they had to have a sudden death kick in order to figure out who won. Yes, they ran out of time! Even though it was cut and edited. Their tie breaker was who could kick the ball closet to a tiki hut on the beach...

No, I'm not a Lions fan. Would I like to see them win, of course. But I don't think i can ever be a fan of a team with an owner like that. Anyone with some sort of football knowledge can see what they are missing. Yet year and year they draft the "best" player out there instead of what they need. I would love to see them win, but I'll never be a fan of them. When they are not on TV here (when they get blacked out) its the best thing, cuz I get to watch other teams play. I just wish the Fords would sell the team already.

Plus, I'm more of a college football fan then pros. I think that has more to do with the team in the area then anything else. I watch tons of football on Sundays, but its just not the same when you have no clear cut favorite team. I watch it and keep up with it more because of fantasy football then caring much about the outcomes.

Bengoodfella said...

I don't blame you for being a Detroit Lions fan. It seems like the Fords really do run that team the way they run their car company. Just riding things out, waiting for it to get better.

I hope there was a not a huge controversy or a coin flip needed to determine who got to kick the ball in the kicker OT. We need the OT to be fair.

I came to football a little later than any of my other favorite sports. I did not watch college football until my uncle moved halfway across the United States and then started sending me memorabilia from my favorite college team, so was sucked into liking them. It helped that they were really good in the 90's and the Panthers had players from that college as well that were fan favorites. I was not really a huge NFL fan before the Panthers came to Charlotte, but once they came to town all bets have been off for me. I don't think the ownership problem would exist down here simply because the fans would just quit paying attention (they probably do that in Detroit). Once George Shinn started being an asshole, the people in Charlotte just quit caring about the NBA and it is pretty much the same today. The Panthers don't have the room to pull that B.S. down here because if they do NASCAR, college basketball, and college football will take its place pretty quickly. I could be wrong but we are quite the reactionary bunch.

I wouldn't blame you for liking the Lions once the Fords quit owning the team though. You have every right not to pay attention.

Unknown said...

Holy hell. Simmons apologized on his podcast today for writing a lousy article about Kobe. He said that he was up against the deadline and had been sick with food poisoning for a couple days so he jsut flushed out the artice and hadn't done all the research that he felt was justified for an article that he was trying to make a point in. He also felt that the point he was really trying to make was lost, and that like some athletes have bad days, this is an article that just isn't any good.

I about fell outta my chair.

Unknown said...

So what you are saying is that Bill knew what he turned in was crap, yet still turned it in? And he gets paid a ton of money for this?? I didn't think I could hate him any more, but I do now. This guy is a professional, he knows his deadlines every single week, he gets paid a ton of money, yet still turns out crap with no research. This isnt a one time thing either, the guy never does research.

If you know when your deadline is, shouldn't you plan accordingly to get your work done? The guy doesn't do anything else, he writes 2 things a week if that. Getting sick happens, but the fact is, he works from home, he can still get his work done even if he is sick. Unlike most of the people in this country that actually have to go into a place of business to work (5 days a week).

I just can't believe that someone who works from home and knows when their deadlines are every single week can't put out a quality column when thats all they do for a living. If you knew your deadline to turn something in every week was Friday, wouldnt you spend your time writing that article the other 7 days? Or do you just work on it the Wed or Thurs before its due? What a deadbeat he is.

Back to the Lions, I'll never actually be a fan of that team no matter what they do. Wanting to see them win and being a fan can be different (i sound like someone, hater...hate). I want to see them win, but I'll never actually care if they do or dont. I'll never spend my money to go see them play or buy any of their stuff. The only football team I'll ever care for in this state is Michigan.

Bengoodfella said...

Martin, I can't believe that he apologized for writing a bad article. I respect him a little for admitting that he did not put a good article out there but I can't believe he did admitted it. Of course he also through the food poisoning excuse out there as well. I should name you Special Liason (spelling?) to Bill Simmons' podcast since I am too lazy to listen to them. The position comes with an honorary nothing.

AJ, I am a sympathetic person and I know food poisoning sucks, but I have to agree with you. You are right that with him putting out only 2 columns a week food poisoning is not a good excuse. Athletes do have bad days but when you are not writing a DAILY column then there is no excuse because you have a couple of days to proofread and re-write the parts you don't like. If you write daily, then you are on a strict deadline and have to get the column in, but if you write one column a week and a shorter magazine column every other week, there is no real excuse.

I hope Michigan football has a better year for you next year. They should, with it being Rich Rod's second year and all. Detroit football teams need something to be excited about.

Unknown said...

Oh wow, Bill has his stupid trade value thing up...

As if you didn't need more proof that this guy hates Kobe, he has him ranked 6th.

Bengoodfella said...

Crap, and I am already deep in something else. I am the only freaking blogger that can't keep up with current events.

Unknown said...

You should hire an intern...didn't Bill do that a few years ago?

Bengoodfella said...

I have no money so it would be a completely no paying gig. The job is available at no pay though. I am so used to Bill putting out a column on Friday, it took me off guard.