3 comments MMQB Review: Peter King Thinks a 64.3% Completion Percentage is Less Than a 63.1% Completion Percentage

Peter King shared Robert Klemko's obsession with Ronda Rousey in last week's MMQB. Peter also detailed how Jay Gruden apparently isn't going to help Robert Griffin succeed this year, Matt Ryan doesn't understand all these games that are on phones, and the Broncos aren't going to make Peyton Manning throw 613 passes per game this year. This week Peter talks about how we forget the Colts were embarrassed again by the Patriots in the playoffs, talks about how FUCKING PRECOCIOUS Marcus Mariota is, something about J.J. Watt that I don't care about since he's quickly entering the "Favre Zone" for me where he goes so far out of the way for attention but nobody cares because he's a great football player (seriously, Watt takes a bunch of selfies and pictures of himself on his Instagram page and then has the gall to mock Mettenberger for taking selfies?), and, of course talks about the ongoing battle between the NFL and Tom Brady over deflated footballs.

Also, Peter played Madden 16. He beat Gerald McCoy at it. So precocious of Peter.

Is it just me, or is there a ridiculous amount of stuff happening in the NFL right now? 

This has been the craziest time around training camp in the history of the NFL...at least until next year.

The Colts have been steamrolled by New England three times in their past 20 games—by scores of 45-7, 42-20 and 43-22—and they curiously haven’t buttressed their run defense, having fallen out of the bidding for Haloti Ngata and Vince Wilfork in the off-season. Tom Brady could have played with Nerf balls and the Colts wouldn’t have anything to complain about. 

This is part of my reasoning why I'm not totally freaking out about the Patriots (allegedly!) using deflated footballs against the Colts. It did not have an effect on the game at all. Not that cheating needs to have an effect on the game to be cheating, but it certainly would help my outrage if I was sure the footballs being deflated by a few tenths of a PSI really gave the Patriots an advantage that was more than mental.

“We got our asses kicked,” Pagano said. “Period. End of story. None of us here will ever forget that day, that final score. We got a damn artery gushing and no sutures to stop the bleeding. You never forget that.” 

But don't worry, the Colts went out and signed Andre Johnson, Frank Gore and drafted Phillip Dorsett. That will totally help prevent the Patriots from scoring 40+ points on the Colts defense again. I'm being snarky of course, the Colts spent six of their eight picks on defense, so consider this defensive problem against the Patriots fixed. Dammit, there's my snark again.

The Colts could have the greatest pass-catching corps in football this year, accompanying the best young quarterback in the game (and Andrew Luck has gone to school on Andrew Luck’s penchant for the big mistake).

Andrew Luck is self-reporting himself for having a penchant for the big mistake. He's accountable to himself, which is probably nice, since I'm sure Peter King certainly wouldn't hold Luck accountable for any big mistakes. Also, the Colts are pretty much re-booting the Manning era in Indianapolis. Not that there isn't anything wrong with this, but at a certain point the Colts have to realize a great quarterback will make his receivers better. A great quarterback can't stop the opposing team from scoring 40 points. I think you get my concern for the Colts. I'll only repeat it 10 more times before the 2015 NFL season is over.

Eight straight practices, eight straight days without an interception for Marcus Mariota, Tennessee wunderkind. You’ll never guess who wants him to throw one.

This isn't difficult. Ken Whisenhunt wants Mariota to throw an INT so he can see how Mariota recovers. I don't have to read MMQB to know this answer.

I played Gerald McCoy of the Bucs in EA Sports’ “Madden 16” game. I am the only male in America who had never played Madden before, and, justifiably, neither McCoy nor teammate Mike Evans, a spectator for the King-McCoy tussle, was impressed with my game. “This is like playing my daughter,’’ said observer Evans. Then, of course, the greatest upset in sports history happened.

You do NOT call Peter King a woman. Women are for cooking and being spied and listened in on while they are walking in Central Park. Peter's fury at being compared to a female obviously drove him to victory.

The Colts scored 458 points last year, which is a lot. And they went out and signed a workhorse back (Frank Gore) and vet receiver Andre Johnson, who has 306 catches over the past three years, and then drafted another receiver, Phillip Dorsett, in the first round. (The Colts will field three wideouts this year who have recorded 40 times under 4.4 seconds.)

Yep, the Colts will have a great offense. That wasn't ever really a question, was it?

In addition, Luck’s big project this offseason was to figure why his interception total rose from nine in 2013 to 16 last year.

Because he threw 7 more interceptions than he did the season before? This is the part where Peter and Chuck Pagano pretend like Andrew Luck isn't going to be a Top-5 quarterback by the end of next season, and possibly a Top-3 quarterback even. It's the part where Luck's 16 interceptions are made a bigger deal than they are, as if he isn't going to learn and be fine.

Okay. Luck’s going to be fine. The offense should average 30 a game. But who’ll stop the reign?

Yes, Luck will be fine. The genius that Ryan Grigson is hasn't done a ton to help Luck out on the defensive side of the ball. At least not in my opinion, but nobody cares what I think.

New England has rushed for 657 yards against the Colts in their past three meetings, which cries out for a fix. Indy hopes 2014 free-agent 3-4 end Arthur Jones (who was hurt half of last season) and 2015 free-agent end Kendall Langford, 650 pounds of run-stopping on the edge, will be the answer.

They may be the answer or the Colts may not even face the Patriots in the playoffs again. Who knows?

GM Ryan Grigson didn’t want to pay $6 million a year to the 33-year-old Wilfork,

I can get that. The Colts are paying 29 year old Kendall Langford $4.5 million this year and Wilfork signed with the Texans on a 2 year $9 million contract, so the idea they would have had to pay Wilfork $6 million per year doesn't seem entirely accurate though. I would pay $9 million for two seasons of Vince Wilfork.

or deal two mid-round picks for Ngata, who might be a one-year Band-aid.

(Insert Trent Richardson joke about Grigson giving up a first round pick for Richardson but not wanting to give up mid-round picks for an actual good NFL player here)

“We have enough here,” said Pagano, meaning enough defensive talent. We’ll see, but perhaps not until the Patriots play in Indy in October … or until they meet again in January.

OR the Colts will end up having to play a different team in the playoffs and the Colts won't meet the Patriots. Either way, the Patriots are not going to be hanging 40+ points on the Colts when they meet in October. They are going to want to hang 60+ points on the Colts.

Two things I hope Frank Gifford is not remembered for:

Having an affair with a flight attendant?

As a football player, being KO’d by Eagles middle linebacker Chuck Bednarik in 1960 on one of the most brutal hits in NFL history.

As a broadcaster, for Howard Cosell, his “Monday Night Football” partner, calling Gifford “the human mannequin.”

I'm not sure why some of these words are in italics.

It was sad to hear about Frank Gifford but "the human mannequin" thing is funny and that hit by Bednarik would have had the media calling him a monster and requesting he be suspended from playing in NFL games for the rest of his natural life. Times have changed.

This Mariota guy’s pretty precocious.

PRETTY FUCKING PRECOCIOUS!

In Nashville the other day, I watched rookie quarterback Marcus Mariota in a team drill do something veteran quarterbacks do in training camp.

He got in a fight with one of the team's starting cornerbacks?

Inside the 10-yard line, from the shotgun, he barked out, “Delta! Delta!” He took a snap and looked left, to a crossing Kendall Wright, closely covered by cornerback Perrish Cox, then quickly scanned to the right, holding cornerback Jason McCourty on his man, and keeping the safety in the middle of the field. “A veteran move,” McCourty said. Then Mariota quickly locked back onto Wright and fired a strike to the outside corner—where Wright could catch the ball but Cox couldn’t reach. Touchdown.

That's not just a veteran move, that's precocious as hell.

Here is the definition of "precocious":

"Of a child; having or showing the qualities or abilities of an adult at an unusually early age."

So here is the biggest issue with Peter calling Mariota "precocious." Mariota is not, because he is an adult. Mariota is 21 years old, so his advanced ability to not throw interceptions and play the quarterback position is impressive, but it's not precocious, because again, MARIOTA IS A FUCKING ADULT HUMAN BEING! I've never understood Peter's weird fascination with calling grown people "precocious" and enjoying adult men who have child-like qualities. It's a little creepy to me. Peter isn't the only one who does this of course, but he loves using the word "precocious" in the context of a grown adult playing football well at a young age. In fact, Peter uses the word "precocious" in as many different contexts as possible.

So Mariota is playing well and developing as a quarterback very nicely, but he's not precocious. He's an adult, not a child, no matter how much Peter creepily would prefer Mariota be more child-like.

Eight practices, no interceptions in team periods or seven-on-seven work. Seriously: Coach Ken Whisenhunt, who doesn’t want the kid fitted for his yellow jacket in Canton just yet, told me: “The hype is getting out of control. I don’t care if he throws an interception out here. Come on—it’s August. It’s camp. I may just have him throw one to get this over with. Just throw one. We gotta get it out of the way.”

Peter said we would never guess who wants Mariota to throw an interception, yet I got it right without actually reading the answer. Probably because it was an obvious answer to an even more obvious little game Peter loves to play. I would have been surprised if the answer was Zach Mettenberger.

“He’s got the ‘it’ factor,’’ said defensive coordinator Ray Horton. “He’s got a sort of je ne sais quoi about him.”

How precocious of Ray Horton to use this phrase!

Now, I’ve covered football for 31 years. I have never heard a coach, or anyone, use “je ne sais quoi” about a player—the indefinable quality, usually in a very good way, used to describe the best of the best. “His poise under pressure looks pretty special,” Horton said.

Maybe the Titans just don't have a very good defense too? Or possibly Mariota is so precocious that he has the abilities of an NFL quarterback while he is still a child at the age of 21.

“The adjustment for me hasn’t been that different,” said Mariota. “The coaches at Oregon really prepared me for this. There’s a lot of similar concepts between Oregon and here. I’m the benefit of so many other people, and that’s helped my transition.”

I'm not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing that Mariota hasn't had to adjust too much from the offense he ran at Oregon to the offense the Titans run.

“The adjustment for me hasn’t been that different,” said Mariota. “The coaches at Oregon really prepared me for this. There’s a lot of similar concepts between Oregon and here. I’m the benefit of so many other people, and that’s helped my transition.”

Nashville. Hawaii. It's the same thing. I've been been to both the city and the state and can report that they are indeed very, very different.

Guess who’s the “Hard Knocks” star?

I'm guessing it's the guy who loves to criticize others for being too focused on taking social media photos and not being focused enough on football? Probably the same guy who was on a reality television show periodically while in college, though I'm sure he would be happy to criticize an NFL player for being on a reality television show periodically.

"Don't take selfies, unless the selfie you are taking shows just how hard you are grinding to be a better player. Then it's okay."

The first show, in fact, will have the rarest of events: a mistake by Watt, highlighted by coach Bill O’Brien in front of the team. Before a practice, Watt, miked, tells a teammate: “Ever since O-B got here, he’s been trying to get me to jump offsides. And I haven’t jumped offsides one time. Not one single time. He talks to me about it all the time.”

So they go out to practice one day, and O’Brien sing-songs to Watt, “We’re gonna get you!” And Watt, too aggressive in anticipating the snap from center, jumps offside. The offense is jubilant.

You got Watt to jump offsides once, but you will end up paying for it in blood when he destroys the offensive lineman in front of him on the next play.

Then, NFL Films cameras show Watt, post-practice, working alone as the sun goes down on his swim moves past the offensive-lineman dummy.

I'm sure Watt had no idea the camera was there, being as how he is so camera-shy and all, especially when it comes to showing off how hard he works.

I think we can see where this is headed: J.J. Watt, reality TV star, on “Hard Knocks: Training Camp with the Houston Texans.” It’s another world for Watt to conquer.

I'm not going to make a snarky comment about this, because it's fine if J.J. Watt embraces becoming a reality star. He's just trying to show everyone how hard he works. When he's taking selfies it's for a purpose more important than just showing himself off. I mean, obviously. He isn't a hypocrite, mostly because I'm guessing he doesn't know what that word means.

Watt is a really, really great player, but the guy shows up in front of a camera every chance he gets, yet he has the gall to call out Mettenberger for taking a selfie. And few in the media will even point this out because they don't want to question him since he's such a fun quote and incredibly talented player.

In Green Bay on Friday, I took some time to do a little math, trying to answer this question:

What’s the best combo platter of quarterbacks in NFL history?

Or, to give it more clarity: What two quarterbacks, back to back, are the best in NFL history?

The answer is obviously Jeff Blake and David Klingler.

I entered into this thinking it would probably be Joe Montana and Steve Young of the 49ers. And maybe it is. Statistics can be twisted a lot of ways, but how do you beat four Super Bowls for Montana and one for Young, and the two-decade greatness they shared under Bill Walsh and George Seifert? But now I am not so sure. I think it’s Brett Favre and Aaron Rodgers.

Of course you do, Peter. I love me some Aaron Rodgers, so it's hard for me to vote against him.

In all metrics except Super Bowl victories (Montana/Young 5, Favre/Rodgers 2), the back-to-back champs looks like the Packer duo.

Does it though, Peter? In terms of "metrics," Peter isn't very precocious with numbers.

Montana/Young: 19 seasons, 213 wins, .643 completion percentage, 465-209 TD-INT
 
​Favre/Rodgers: 23 seasons, 248 wins, .631 completion percentage, 668-343 TD-INT

So in "all metrics" which obviously doesn't include wins per season, completion percentage and TD:INT ratio, Favre/Rodgers win. I'm wondering how Peter can write "all" metrics when the numbers very clearly state here that Montana/Young won more games per season, completed passes at a higher percentage and had a better TD:INT ratio than Favre/Rodgers. I understand Peter tends to make up his own definitions of words that contradict the dictionary definition of that word (precocious, factoid), but "all" generally means "everything," not "a few numbers not given context in a comparison to each other."

I’ve found it pretty amazing that if you’re a fan of the Packers, and if you’re, say, 27 right now, you’ve never had a hopeless season because your Packers have always had a top quarterback. We found a big Packers’ fan who is 27: Kevin Sutter, of Blue Mounds, Wis. “We talk about it, me and my brothers,” Sutter said. “We talk about it a lot—just how incredibly crazy it is that for our entire childhood we saw how great Brett Favre was. He was in the top two or three quarterbacks in the league for like 10-12 years,

Was Favre though? Was he in the top two or three quarterbacks in the NFL for 10-12 years? From 1994-2005 Favre was a top-two or top-three quarterback? Might want to think on that for a little bit and then take back some of this exaggeration.

We remember when we were 10 years old and we saw Favre, and now you just appreciate it so much more how good Rodgers is. I can’t even imagine watching a team you love struggle to find a franchise quarterback.”

Well, maybe one day you will get to do it. It's great, you'll love it.

Aside from Sydney Seau’s warm words, the best of the rest of the speeches Saturday night:

Ron Wolf

"At that time there was always a threat to players of other teams that if they didn't shape up, they would be traded to Green Bay. We worked hard to eliminate that stigma. Suddenly players wanted to come and be a part of football's most illustrious franchise and to play in pro football's most storied cathedral, Lambeau Field."

I mean, I guess so. This seems like another exaggeration since the Packers have such a storied history and Wolf calls Lambeau Field "football's most storied cathedral." It was probably not easy to get free agents to Green Bay, but I think the idea there was a huge stigma about playing in Green Bay is slightly overblown by Wolf.

Jerome Bettis

Welp, open the floodgates then...

I am not totally against Bettis being in the Hall of Fame, but I think the fact he was a good quote and smiled a lot helped as much as his career numbers helped him. Bettis is supposed to be one of the best running backs of all-time, but never led the NFL in rushing yards, is 5th all-time in career touches while being 32nd all-time in all-purpose yards. He scored a lot of touchdowns though, even though he never cracked the Top-5 in an NFL season in rushing touchdowns. Bettis was always really good, but I never really considered him one of the best running backs in my opinion. He just doesn't do it for me. If he stays with the Rams for his entire career and doesn't smile a lot, I think he's on the outside looking in.

What you need to know about Brady/Goodell this week.

Nothing. I need to know nothing, yet I will be told a lot of things.

McCann, the founding director of the University of New Hampshire’s Sports and Entertainment Law Institute, has been on top of this story from the start. McCann’s report:

Keep this in mind: The legal question for Judge Berman is not whether Brady “did it.” It’s whether the NFL lawfully followed Article 46 of the collective bargaining agreement and the “law of shop,” which refers to fairness and consistency in arbitration.

I don't ever see how the guy who hands out the punishment can hear the appeal of the punishment, but that's just me probably.

Among those arguable defects is the confusing role played by attorney Ted Wells, whom the NFL has repeatedly hailed as “independent” yet who testified that he shared drafts of his report in advance with NFL attorneys and who has invoked the attorney-client privilege as a way of trying to not answer questions.

The idea Ted Wells was "independent" was always laughable to the point of absurdity. He's the guy the NFL hired to look into the Patriots deflating footballs. Of course he's not an independent investigator.

Judge Berman vacating the suspension would constitute a victory for Brady, but not necessarily a lasting one. The NFL would appeal the loss to the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit, which has on occasion reversed NFL district court losses into wins. Even without an appellate court reversal, Judge Berman vacating the suspension would remand the matter to Goodell or his designee for “further proceedings…as permitted by the CBA.”  This could set the table for another round of contentious league hearings. Oh, and there’s that lurking possibility that Brady could file a defamation lawsuit in Massachusetts state court at anytime.

This is all over footballs that were deflated by a very small amount. Deflated footballs and now Tom Brady could file a defamation suit, but only after the NFL goes to the Second Circuit court to reverse the decision of a district court judge. Again, the footballs were deflated by a few tenths of a PSI. Does anyone but Roger Goodell, the Patriots organization, Patriots fans and Tom Brady really care that much?

My one question about the NFL’s stance now: In the Wells Report, Brady was found to be “at least generally aware” of the scheme to deflate footballs below the 12.5-psi minimum.

But in the NFL’s 15-page brief submitted to the judge in advance of Wednesday’s conference, the NFL writes: “The commissioner suspended Brady for having ‘approved of, consented to, and provided inducements in support of’ a scheme to tamper with the game balls. And for having ‘willfully obstructed the subsequent investigation.’ 

But how did we get from being at least generally aware of a scheme to deflate game balls to having “approved of, consented to,” and providing inducements to aid a scheme to deflate footballs?

Peter is going to get himself suspended if he keeps daring to ask questions like this. I would give my opinion on this, but that would be parsing this whole story out more than I really care to. The NFL seems like they are making things up as they go along to make their case seem better than it truly is.

Sunday night’s Hall of Fame Game marked the first one with the new point-after-touchdown rule. After a touchdown, a team will have the option to place the ball at the 15-yard line for the one-point conversion kick (the equivalent of a 33-yard field goal); or to place the ball at the 2-yard line if the team chooses to go for a two-point conversion.

When I was in Latrobe, I ran into long-time special-teams coach Danny Smith, and he asked me a question I hadn’t considered: If you choose to kick the extra point, and the defense jumps offside and gets flagged for an offside penalty, can you change your mind and choose to go for two? With the half-the-distance penalty, that would put the ball at the one, and you might have a lot of teams choosing to go for two if you could snap from the one.

Peter was all about asking how many times a field goal kicker missed the extra point as a reason for moving the extra point back, yet how many times has the defense jumped offside on an extra point?

It happened nine times in 2014. It's the penalty that happened on "0" down when looking at the chart. 

Defenders only jumped offside on an extra point nine times during 2014. Yet, Peter acts like this is a game-changing question that makes the new field goal rule even that much more interesting. 

So I checked with the league, and indeed, the answer is yes. After an offside call with the ball at the 15-yard line, a coach could take the penalty and put the ball at the 10-yard line for the PAT, or take the half-the-distance penalty and choose to go for two at the one-yard line.

How many times have you seen Tom Brady take a slight leap from the one-yard line and push the ball over the goal line with extended arms? Or Drew Brees? That, to me, is a huge part of this new rule, and could lead to a lot of changed minds after five-yard penalties on PATs.

What if defenders jump offside 10 times during the 2015 season? Man, what an intriguing scenario for a situation that happens a lot!

Peter, who has been a huge proponent of the new extra point rule, wants to make it seem exciting like this new rule now adds a whole new dimension to an NFL game. Well, there were 8 missed extra points in the NFL last year and 9 times the defense jumped offside. So if Peter thinks a rule should be changed because a missed extra point occurred 8 times, how can he try to make it seem like a defensive offside that happened 9 times is a huge part of the new rule? Of course, Peter didn't do any research before writing MMQB, but I like how 8 missed extra points isn't a significant number, but he gets all excited about how a scenario that only happened 9 times last year will make the new extra point rule that much more thrilling.

One of the interesting things about having a staff of young people is the generation of ideas I’d never have thought of. Robert Klemko had one as we headed south in the first couple of days of the training camp trip.

You should play Madden against a player.

Yes, playing a video game is a brilliant new idea Peter had not quite gotten around to thinking of yet.

Funny thing: Players really care about their rating. Evans was fuming when he saw 20 receivers were rated higher than he was. “The ratings are crazy,” Evans said. “All the years, all the money I’ve been wasting on Madden, the hard work I put in on the field, getting hit in the head, knees hurting, and I still can’t get a 90 rating overall. Twenty other receivers are rated higher than me. It’s crazy, man. It hurts, man. I am a little bitter.”

Yeah, well, Mike there are 20 receivers better than you in the NFL right now. So there's that.

Still 7-7. But I had fourth-and-28 from my 12-yard line. I was going for it. What’s there to lose? Nothing. What’s there to gain? Fun!

I chose a deep pass. I have no idea what McCoy chose to do. All I know is Klemko told me to wait till the last second to throw. ”Hit the green button, wait a little, and then hit the blue button,” Klemko said.

Manziel was getting rushed. I waited … and just as Manziel as about to get leveled, I hit the blue button. Way down the left side, backup wideout Taylor Gabriel was free, his corner having tripped on the play. And the ball nestled into Gabriel’s hands. “Yes! YES! YES!” I screamed. Easy touchdown. Easy 88-yard touchdown. On fourth-and-29.

King wins! King wins!

This is some of the bullshit which explains why I don't enjoy playing video games against other people. I realized a few years ago that it's no fun to lose to someone who has no clue what he's doing on these games. I don't handle it that well.

“Way to go on that Brady thing.”

—New Hall of Fame member Ron Wolf, passing commissioner Roger Goodell at the Pro Football Hall of Fame’s yellow-jacket ceremony Thursday night in Canton.

Wolf did not appear sarcastic.

I can only wonder how many PSI below the appropriate weight some footballs can be at Lambeau Field when it is cold as hell out on the field If the cold in New England can decrease the PSI in a football, how much will the PSI decrease in the freezing cold winters of Wisconsin?

In the off-season, the Chicago Bears’ new coach, John Fox, hired former 49ers defensive coordinator Vic Fangio as his defensive coordinator. Fangio, in his four seasons running the San Francisco defense, had some good games against the Packers—and, well, I’ll be—the Bears host the Packers on the first Sunday of the NFL season.

Yes, I'm sure John Fox hired Fangio simply so he could win two games against the Packers every season.

• Aaron Rodgers versus San Francisco with Fangio as defensive coordinator: 0-4.

• Aaron Rodgers versus every other defensive coordinator: 76-34.

It’s not quite so glaring when you look at the numbers, and it’s probably more an indictment of the Packers defense. Green Bay put up 25.3 points per game on offense against Fangio in those four games, and Rodgers’ passer rating was a slightly below-his-norm 96.0.

Typical Peter King. He uses a statistic and then admits he's providing a misleading statistics, but alas, wants his original point to still stand.

"Here's a statistic about how Aaron Rodgers can't beat a Vic Fangio-led defense and here is a conclusion I've drawn about that. If you really pay attention then you see it isn't really Rodgers' fault that the Packers have lost to a Vic Fangio-led defense four times and the Packers offense probably has nothing to do with Rodgers' 0-4 record against the 49ers, but let's not do that. Let's pretend this statistic from me means something." 

The four Titans’ preseason games will be televised live in Hawaii, birthplace and place of residence and schooling for the first 17 years of the life of Marcus Ardel Taulauniu Mariota.

I mean, Hawaii is pretty much Nashville.

Ten Things I Think I Think

3. I think Seattle safety Kam Chancellor is a heck of a player, obviously. Who doesn’t think so? Likeable guy too. But holding out for a new deal after two years of a five-year contract is simply a non-starter.

This from the guy who thought the Vikings should have paid Adrian Peterson more money in order to negotiate a truce with him and have him show up to training camp. Peter suggested this while Peterson had three more years on his contract with the Vikings. So Peter thinks Chancellor shouldn't be holding out for more money with three years left on his contract, but he's all about Adrian Peterson getting more money with three years left on his contract. Consistency, thy name isn't entirely "Peter King."

In the first two years of the deal, he made $12.55 million, including bonuses. In the last three years, he is slated to make $16.875 million, including bonuses but not including incentives. You might say that $5.6 million a year for a top-five NFL safety is too little, and I might agree … except that the contract, in 2013 dollars, was very much a market-value deal. Chancellor signed it. Seattle has had a practice of working on players’ contract with a year left, or when they reach free agency. Even if it means sacrificing Chancellor for the season (I don’t think that will happen, but it could), Schneider will do more damage with his roster by giving in than by holding firm.

But giving more money to a guy who missed the entire previous season due to suspension and is among the highest-paid players at his position in an effort to get back in this player's good graces and entice him to report to training camp? It's a brilliant idea.

4. I think this is one good reason why it’s harder to play quarterback in New York than in most markets: Geno Smith was booed at the Jets’ open (free) scrimmage at MetLife Stadium on Saturday night. I mean, booed on Aug. 8, in a practice. I’m all for fan freedom to do whatever the heck they want, but that is just stupid. Boo the guy when he stinks in a game. But in his first fortnight of training camp with a new offense? What is wrong with people?

Maybe they thought it was Josh Freeman, Peter. I'm sure booing Freeman is something you can get behind.

7. I think the best thing I heard about Jameis Winston in Tampa is this, from a smart guy in the Bucs’ offices: “Have you seen him in the papers one time since the draft? No.” In other words, he gets that the best thing for a rookie quarterback is to work on his craft and not be this year’s Johnny Manziel.

Wait, the Buccaneers are talking up their rookie quarterback who got compared to Manziel because of his off-the-field issues that he had during college, and in talking him up they are showing he is totally different from Manziel? I don't believe it.

I don't think working on his craft was ever the issue with Winston at Florida State. The issues that others had with him was what he did in the spare time he had when he wasn't working on his craft. So it is good news, but also I wouldn't expect the Buccaneers to say anything different.

10. I think these are my non-football thoughts of the week:

a. Smart column by the Philadelphia Inquirer’s Mike Sielski defending Chip Kelly, and with good reason.

I'm not sure why Peter writes "with good reason," other than he thinks the idea Chip Kelly is racist is ridiculous. It might very well be, but these are the times when I wish Peter had not quit running his "Chip Kelly Wisdom of the Week" section of MMQB where he hung on every word Kelly said as if it were coming from a deity. It would be a really funny section to read right now.

c. Bernie Miklasz’s last column for the St. Louis Post Dispatch on Sunday was in keeping with what Miklasz always does.

Shitty work? Mediocre writing but from a great guy? DON'T HOLD BACK WHAT YOU THINK, PETER! I CAN'T HANDLE THE DRAMA OF YOU WRITING A SENTENCE ONLY TO HOLD BACK ON WHAT YOU THINK!

Which is great work. 

Hey, it's the Cardinals Beat Writer's Way. Expect nothing less.

g. Donald Trump. Filterless.

There is a difference in being filterless and saying stupid shit all the time. Not having a filter involves saying things that you believe which may have some form of the truth behind them. I'm not sure Trump means what he says or is being truthful.

h. Eleven days on the road and counting. I have not turned the TV on in my room one time. It isn’t that I don’t like TV. I do. But there’s something about getting away from it for a while, immersing oneself in a new season and jumping into football full-go.

i. For those who wonder, I was traveling from Chicago to Anderson, Ind., during the Hall of Fame speeches. Watched them on YouTube when I got here.

These days, watching videos on a computer is pretty much the same thing as watching videos on a television. Same difference.

j. Coffeenerdness: You know, in desperate times, six shots of espresso in a grande macchiato is not so bad.

Jesus, it's not all the coffee that Peter drinks, but how much he spends on this coffee that blows my mind. Six shots of espresso? I get pissy when my wife buys some drink that costs $3.50 at Starbucks.

o. Bob Cousy, 87. That snuck up on us.

Yes, it did sneak up on "us." I have really been trying to pay attention to when Bob Cousy turned 87, then BAM, the next thing I know it happened.

The Adieu Haiku

On the road again
We've got the Lions today Bonjour, Haloti

Amazing. Every week Peter makes the Adieu Haiku more pointless, aimless and idiotic than the last week's haiku. I don't know how he does it. In a year or two, the Adieu Haiku will consist just of random words thrown together to form the correct number of syllables on each line. 

8 comments MMQB Review: J.J. Watt For MVP, Except Peter Doesn't Have the Guts To Vote For Him Edition

Peter King discussed the Super Bowl preview game played at Lambeau Field between the Patriots and Packers in last week's MMQB. He also revealed the source, who gave Peter most of the information that he based his Ray Rice reporting around, did indeed mislead him and was simply furthering their own agenda in giving Peter false information. There was a very liberal use of "we" in MMQB, as usual, concerning how "we" counted out the Chargers after their blowout loss to the Dolphins a few weeks ago. This week Peter wonders if J.J. Watt can be MVP (he upped his workout schedule and that's why he's playing so well...I'll classify that under "reasons explaining a player's superior performance that would be called into question if it were about a baseball player"), begins his eventual assault on Jadeveon Clowney's performance, and has no traveling note this week.

This year a defensive player is gaining some traction for the MVP, and for good reason: J.J. Watt, most of us would agree, is the best player by the widest margin at his position in the NFL.

Okay, this is true. It does make me wonder about how one small thing though. I'm not denying Watt's fantastic year and super-humble nature that gets constantly rammed down the throats of readers, but is the fact Watt the best player by the widest margin a reflection on how well he is playing or a reflection on how there aren't other defensive ends quite on his level this season? What I mean is this...Aaron Rodgers is probably the best quarterback right now, but would he be a better MVP candidate if there were no other quarterbacks performing at close to a high level like he is? I'm not taking anything away from Watt, but if Justin Houston had defensed a few more passes, had an interception, and caught the fancy of sportswriters by catching a few touchdown passes would Watt be an MVP candidate like he is? I'm asking, I really am. Would Watt have less of a case because he's not the best player at his position by such a wide margin?

Does that make Watt the MVP? I’ll investigate.

Peter will really investigate, not "Did Ray Rice hit his fiance and I'll talk to one source then write my entire column on the subject matter based on this one source's reporting" investigate.

But first, let’s sum up where we are as we head into the last 49 games of the regular season:

It all adds up to the craziest season in NFL history since the 2013 NFL season. 

If the Patriots win home-field in the AFC (three remaining foes’ combined record: 16-23), their quarterback and revived defense will make them very hard to beat in Foxboro. Or anywhere, for that matter.

Remember when the Patriot Way wasn't working anymore?  

The best team in the NFC South is 4-8-1. Carolina could actually win the fourth seed in the NFC playoffs.

They had one quality game against an opponent they were extremely motivated to play. Jerricho Cotchery still starts at wide receiver and the offensive line still sucks. Don't overreact to one game.

Can you imagine Seattle at Carolina on wild-card weekend?

Yeah, I have attended two of those games over the past couple of years. It set NFL offenses back forty years.

Frustrating first 56 minutes for Indianapolis on Sunday. Exhilarating final four minutes. “If anything’s frustrating,” said Andrew Luck, “it’s my bonehead mistakes.” Luck handed Cleveland 17 points, but had the stuff to drive 90 yards for the winning touchdown in the final minutes. What else is new? The Colts are winning the AFC South again.

I'm going to resist the urge to hate on the AFC South here.

“Whoever you pick I’m sure will be deserving,” Watt told me from Houston. “The way I look at it is, I’ll worry about what happens on the field. And I’ll let all of you worry about the MVP.”

I can imagine Peter hopping over to Watt like a school girl and teasing Watt about possibly getting Peter's vote for MVP. I'm sure Peter thought he was being quite precocious.

“If all positions were created equal, J.J. Watt’s the best player in football by a mile, and it isn’t close,” said Neil Hornsby, the founder of Pro Football Focus, which judges every player on every snap.

Aaron Schatz, the president of the long-running football analytics group Football Outsiders, agreed: “Watt is by far the best player as his position compared to the average of his position.”

As I was stating earlier, it is relative to his position. I don't think it goes to diminish Watt's performance that he is outpacing every other player at his position, but I don't necessarily see this as the key link to his MVP candidacy. If another player at Watt's position were closer to his performance, does that mean that Watt has less of an MVP candidacy? If so, then his candidacy is based on the performance of others at his position and not his individual performance. Imagine if other MVP's were judged this way. Imagine if Peyton Manning weren't considered a legitimate MVP candidate because he set multiple passing records, but Aaron Rodgers came close to setting passing records himself.

There’s also the dedication that, even in this era of players dedicated to greatness, seems put on. Except the scars would show after a while, and they haven’t shown on Watt yet. In training camp I asked him about how he continued to strive to be better. Watt said: “I heard a quote that says, ‘Success isn’t owned. It’s leased. And rent is due every day.’ Every single day, someone’s coming for your job. Someone’s coming for your greatness. If you’re the greatest, someone wants to be the greatest, and so if you’re not constantly improving your game, somebody else is.

You want the guy to be a legit MVP candidate, don’t you?

Not really, Bill Simmons. I still don't truly care about awards like MVP until some sportswriter writes something stupid about them.

Then in the caption under a picture of Watt to the right it states that he upped his workout regiment in the offseason and it is paying off on the field. I love to imagine these things written about a baseball player and see how that goes over.

So then the question becomes whether we can logically judge whether a defensive lineman can be as valuable to his team as a quarterback can be. In an ideal world, football would have a stat similar to “WAR” in baseball—Wins Above Replacement.

Oh sure, NOW everyone wants WAR to help solve a problem in comparing two different players. If football had a WAR-type of statistic then it would only be used by some sportswriters, while other writers would spend 25% of their time pointing out how stupid the statistic is and making fun of those who use it.

So then it comes down to the judgment of 50 people: Can a defensive end possibly mean as much to his team as, say, an Aaron Rodgers, who can put a touchdown on the board every time he possesses the ball? Probably not.

If that's decided then a defensive end can never be the MVP. It just can't happen if a defensive end can never mean as much to his team as a quarterback. That doesn't feel right though, does it?

Then there’s the matter of Houston being a middle-of-the-pack team. The Texans are 7-6. They are seventh in the league in scoring defense, 27^th in the league in yards allowed (a wide disparity). This doesn’t help Watt. MVPs most often come from the offensive side of the field, and from playoff teams.

It's the "MVP" award, not the "MVP for a player whose team will make the playoffs" award. Besides, it doesn't matter if a defensive end can't mean as much to his team (meaning, he can't be as valuable) as a quarterback.

Then there’s the matter of Houston being a middle-of-the-pack team. The Texans are 7-6. They are seventh in the league in scoring defense, 27^th in the league in yards allowed (a wide disparity). This doesn’t help Watt. MVPs most often come from the offensive side of the field, and from playoff teams.

Yeah, but J.J. Watt works hard and everyday is a grind (insert continual J.J. Watt-like cliches that sportswriters eat up like it's a free buffet)...and that's why I try to stay humble and prove myself everyday.

“Doesn’t the MVP always have to be a quarterback simply by virtue of how the game is played [today]?” asked Schatz. Possibly, but Adrian Peterson, in his 2,096-yard season two years ago, lifted the Vikings into the playoffs with mediocrity all over the roster, and he edged Peyton Manning that year.

I don't think the MVP always has to be a quarterback. Maybe I'm being too open-minded, but while I understand that quarterbacks usually have the greatest effect on a team's record, Adrian Peterson had a fantastic year when Christian Ponder was his quarterback. If he didn't get the MVP, then he deserved a medal of some kind.

The APasks for one winner. (I’m on record as wishing we voted as in baseball, 1 through 10, so we could see how close the vote really is. If you have to pick one, even in a very close vote, it often doesn’t mirror the closeness of the contest.) Three weeks from the end of the season, here is my standing of the top five:

1. Aaron Rodgers
2. J.J. Watt
3. Tom Brady
4. DeMarco Murray
5. Peyton Manning

Here's my confusion about Peter's vote. In the case of J.J. Watt an MVP voter has to consider two separate issue. Whether a defensive player either can't or can win the MVP award and whether player for a losing team either can or can't be considered for the MVP award. If Peter's answer to these two statements is that a defensive player on a losing team CAN win the MVP then what would Watt have to do in order to get Peter's vote? That's what I wonder. It seems like throwing Watt #2 is a cop-out to say, "Yeah, he had a great year and I think he should be considered for the MVP, but I'm not giving him the MVP award because I secretly won't give it to a defensive player on a losing team. I want to make it seem like I will though."

Who knows who wins the craziest show on turf, redux? Atlanta would have it wrapped up but for terrible clock management at the end of a one-point loss to Detroit and a two-point loss to Cleveland. If those two games had been coached properly down the stretch, the Falcons would be on a five-game winning streak headed in Lambeau Field tonight, and would have the division clinched by now.

And if a frog had wings then it wouldn't bump it's ass on the ground.

Let’s assume Atlanta loses in Green Bay tonight. The three NFC South teams would be separated by a half game … and, amazingly, any of the three teams could win the division by winning the final three games on its schedule. Each team, too, could think it’s the best team, based on one recent result: Atlanta over Arizona 29-16 last week; New Orleans over Pittsburgh 35-32 last week; and Carolina over New Orleans 41-10 this week. My pick to win the division? Carolina, with the impressive 1-6 record since week six.

The Panthers haven't won a game since Week 6 and have been blown out a couple of times during that stretch, and yet Peter still thinks they are the best team in the NFC South based on their one good performance against the Saints. Not that Peter makes knee-jerk reactions or anything like that of course.

“For a lot of the season,” Cam Newton said from New Orleans Sunday afternoon, “a lot of our guys, because we’re so young, have had kind of a deer-in-the-headlights look.

Newton is talking about his offensive line, who have spent most of the season only pretending they care to block the guy in front of them in a desperate attempt to have their starting quarterback murdered.

But for so many of these guys it’s just time and experience. That’s what they need. Time. We’ve had time together. We’ve grown together.’’

It's amazing how everything is great and they've "grown together" after a win against a divisional opponent that the Panthers have no difficulty getting pumped up to face. Next week I have a feeling the growth will stop and the patchwork offensive line will go back to it's regularly scheduled sucktitude.

Dan Quinn is setting himself up to be a strong head-coaching candidate...I said to Quinn that a lot of times a team’s postseason success can work against an aspiring head coach, because some (most) owners get impatient and won’t wait until after the Super Bowl to hire their coach. I told him for his sake I hope the length of the season didn’t roadblock him from a head-coaching shot. “I hope it does,” he blurted. That’s the kind of attitude, I’d think, that a prospective owner would like.

Dan Quinn is the J.J. Watt of NFL defensive coordinators. Dan Quinn is the real MVP.

T-minus three weeks, and Tampa Bay now leads the Marcus Mariota derby. Oakland’s win over San Francisco takes the Raiders out of the first slot in the 2015 draft. That leaves five teams at 2-11, vying for the top pick and the right to take Mariota (presumably—considering all the off-field problems swirling around Jameis Winston).

It's amazing to me that Peter already knows who the #1 overall pick in the draft will be.

1. Tampa Bay. The Bucs would sit and take Mariota, or raffle it for a ransom to a quarterback-needy team.

So if the Buccaneers raffle the #1 overall pick to a quarterback-needy team, does that mean they will ransom the pick to themselves?

2. Tennessee. The Titans would be in line for Mariota too.

But what about Jake Locker's accuracy? It can be improved!

5. Oakland. Euphoria over beating San Francisco—except in the guts of the scouts, who will say the right thing, but really: The first pick in the draft is worth far, far more than a morale-boosting win in December.

Yeah well, don't tell any NBA sportswriters that because they are too busy having a shit-fit at the idea of teams tanking in order to get a better draft pick. That's even in the NBA, where the worst team doesn't necessarily even get the #1 overall pick, as opposed to the NFL where there is no lottery system used to auction off the #1 overall pick.

Last point here: For Tennessee, it’s New Jersey, New Jersey, with the Jets following the Giants to Nashville this week. (Not New York, New York, because the two teams play and practice and do business in New Jersey.) Why on earth would Ken Whisenhunt, who, presumably, is going to be the coach in 2015, pull out all the stops to try to win this game? Take your medicine, lose, and get the highest pick you can so you can be in the best position possible to take the best quarterback or best player—or trade the pick for a few good ones.

So NFL writers want to use a statistic like WAR and encourage NFL teams to tank? It's a different world from the outrage seen from sportswriters in the NBA and MLB on these two sets of issues.

Washington has finished in last place in the NFC East in five of the last six years, and is on track to do it a seventh time in eight years. The team has had eight coaches this decade; that’s exactly how many coaches the other three teams in the division have had, combined, in this century. Yet the Washington Post reported over the weekend that Jay Gruden, handed a five-year guaranteed contract 11 months ago, would be “one and done,” or fired after one season,

Thanks for explaining exactly what that means, Peter. I was confused as to what that term meant because I am one of your readers who aren't nearly as smart as you are. I'm glad you are here to help educate the ignorant like you do.

And a new frontier for MMQB this morning. I have video takes on three things—Sean Payton running out of answers in New Orleans, the Jim Harbaugh era teetering to an end in San Francisco, and the dubious helmet-to-helmet call on Brandon Browner in San Diego last night—up on Page 1 of this column today. I’d love to hear, and read, your reactions to the video piece, either with an email (talkback@themmqb.com) or Twitter (@SI_PeterKing).

It's good that Peter is trying different things, but I don't like videos nor do I like podcasts. It's a personal preference. I prefer to read my information as opposed to having to sit through a 10 minute conversation or 45 minute podcast. Hearing people talk is never preferable to me just reading information.

We’ll try it for the last four regular-season weeks. If you like it and consume it, we’ll keep doing it. If not, we won’t. Your call.

If it's our call then can the "Adieu Haiku" go away? Also, the "Chip Kelly Wisdom of the Week," "Tweets of the Week," "Quotes of the Week," and any updates on coffee can also go away...assuming it really is up to me and Peter's other readers.

Looking at the history of the six coaches who have been traded in the past 20 years, it seems foolish for the 49ers to think of getting only a third-round pick for Jim Harbaugh, if they trade him after the season. That’s the compensation Pro Football Talk reported the Browns and Niners were discussing after last season.

That is a ridiculously small bit of compensation for a coach who has turned around a once-proud but moribund franchise and helped turn it into one of the winningest teams in football.

Look at Bill Belichick’s résumé before Patriots owner Bob Kraft traded a first-round pick for him in 2000. He was 37-45 in five seasons as Browns coach, with a distinguished career as a coordinator. And he got Bob Kraft of the Patriots to give up a 2000 first-round pick for him.

Perhaps this is a reason that the trade of Harbaugh to the Browns was never actually completed? The 49ers realized they were undervaluing Harbaugh.

If I were Niners owner Jed York, I’d read Parcells: A Football Life, by Bill Parcells and writer Nunyo Demasio.

Oh, quit pimping out the book about your boy Parcells.

In it, Demasio describes Parcells playing hardball with Patriots owner Robert Kraft over the Belichick compensation. Kraft first offered third- and fourth-round picks for Belichick. In the next phone conversation, it rose to second- and third-round picks. In one last conversation, Kraft agreed to surrender the Patriots’ first-round pick, with some low-round picks being exchanged as a sweetener.

I don’t see why Jim Harbaugh in 2015 isn’t worth to some team at least what Bill Belichick was worth to the Patriots in 2000. At least.

While I do agree, there are a couple of factors I don't believe Peter is considering when discussing the compensation received for Harbaugh versus that received for Belichick. There is a perception about Harbaugh that he is (a) difficult to deal with or (b) might get a bug up his ass and head back to coach a college football team. This perception wasn't there for Belichick. He didn't rub the front office the wrong way or have his name appear every time Michigan or another college program was looking for a new head coach. I think this affects the compensation the 49ers could receive for Harbaugh.

What owner and GM would want to take on a head coach who has shown he conflicts with his GM over personnel issues and seems to still have interest in coaching college football? Sure, Harbaugh is a great NFL coach, but he had conflicts with a really good GM in San Francisco, so what happens if he works for a team with a lesser GM? Is Harbaugh going to want equal power over personnel issues with that GM? If Harbaugh gets angry over the direction of the franchise will he just go coach college football again? I think these are legitimate questions an owner and GM has to ask. Harbaugh is a great coach, but is worth a first round pick, the new contract, and power that he will want within the organization?

Very few. Because his rookie season never really got off the ground. This is what you need to know about Clowney’s freshman year in the NFL, after being picked first overall and having his season wrecked by hernia, concussion and knee issues:

Compensation in bonuses and salary: $14,938,000. Games played: 4.
 
Plays: 143.
Tackles: 7.
Sacks: 0.
Quarterback hits (via Pro Football Focus): 0.

I feel like Jadeveon Clowney is about to get Josh Freeman'd if he gets injured again next season. Meanwhile, Matt Schaub is being paid $8 million to sit the Raiders' bench and Peter doesn't seem to give a shit. Josh Freeman got $2 million and Clowney was injured all year, but Peter chooses to focus on those two players as wastes of money for some reason. I'm not trying to create a strawman, but Clowney isn't the first rookie to be injured during his first season in the NFL. Luke Joeckel was drafted #2 overall in 2013 and he played in five games last season.

Clowney’s next payday will be in late July, when the Texans will pay him a roster bonus of $922,409.

I'm not sure where Peter is getting the compensation of $14,938 for Clowney. Spotrac has him at $4,049,636 for the 2014 season. I'm showing the entire bonus for Clowney over the four years of his contract is closer to the compensation in bonuses and salary that Peter shows for Clowney during just the 2014 season. It sounds like I either have bad information or Peter needs to get his information correct. Either way, Clowney is now on Peter's radar as a useless piece of trash who needs to earn his contract.

The Fine Fifteen

3. Seattle (9-4). Troy Aikman on FOX, as the 24-14 dismantling of the Eagles in Philadelphia wound down: “The Seattle defense, they’re completely overwhelming. They’ve given up one play—that touchdown to [Zach] Ertz.” In the past three wins over Arizona, San Francisco and Philadelphia—by a combined 62-20—the Seahawks have allowed 204, 164 and 139 yards. 139 yards against a Chip Kelly offense! In Kelly’s house!

I think the 2014 NFL season will be the year where sportswriters count out certain teams early in the season (Seattle, New England) only to feel silly once those teams become competitive again. 

4. Denver (10-3). That was a tough win, 24-17 over Buffalo. When Peyton Manning goes touchdownless, with two interceptions, you know you’ve played a tough defense. But you also know the offense isn’t clicking the way it should. The Broncos really need Julius Thomas (ankle) back.

(Insert here snarky comment about Peyton Manning not being able to function as well without Pro Bowlers at every receiver position)

8. Arizona (10-3). It wasn’t always pretty, but Drew Stanton (15 of 30, 239 yards, one TD, no picks) did the most important thing of all: He didn’t cough the ball up. No turnovers. And now the Cards can take a giant step toward the most incredible division title by any team this year Thursday night at St. Louis.

No. The most important thing of all is that the Cardinals' defense held the Chiefs to 14 points in this game. Stanton not turning the ball over is obviously important too, but the most important thing is the Cardinals' defense played well. That's how they can win playoff games, because I will stick to this view, relying on Drew Stanton or the running game won't win games in the playoffs.

12. Pittsburgh (8-5). After a great day in Cincinnati, and another huge play by Martavis Bryant, I am left with this: You figure out the Steelers. They confuse me.

Peter historically seems very confused about teams that are inconsistent. He can deal with a team that is precocious, but a team that doesn't play at the same level every week really vexes Peter. The Steelers can be an inconsistent team. There's not much else that needs explaining.

13. Cincinnati (8-4-1). Speaking of that, you figure out the Bengals. They confound me.

See above and insert the word "Bengals" in for "Steelers."

15. St. Louis (6-7). The Rams are 3-1 in their last four, including three dominant defensive games: 22-7 over Denver, 52-0 over Oakland and 24-0 over Washington. First back-to-back shutouts by the Rams since 1945. That is pretty good.

Yep, it's almost like there is talent on defensive side of the ball. The Rams are two wins and a loss closer to Jeff "8-8" Fisher fulfilling his destiny for one more season. 

Defensive Players of the Week
 
J.J. Watt, defensive end, Houston.

Don’t you think I get tired of this Watt-as-Player-of-the-Week rigmarole every week? 

No, I think you quite enjoy the Watt-as-Player-of-the-Week rigmarole every single week. You have control over who you name as Defensive Player of the Week, and even if you didn't, then you still talk about Watt enough to where it's obvious you don't dislike discussing his greatness.

Comic relief happened after Sunday’s 27-13 win over the Jags in Jacksonville, with three more sacks for Watt. A reporter asked him a question and included the fact that Watt had two sacks, and … “How many?” Watt said. “Those suckers are hard to get. Don’t short me, brother.”

I should have peed before reading that moment of comic relief, because I just pissed my pants based on the hilarity of J.J. Watt's comeback to the reporter. Not that Watt is focused on personal statistics or anything of course. What a comedian.

(I had to add that last part for a little additional snark)

Coach of the Week

Gregg Williams, defensive coordinator, St. Louis. The Rams are the first team this season to shut out two straight foes (and the first Rams team to do it since World War II), and they’ve now held the Raiders and Washington to a combined 450 yards. Those are not two good offensive teams, but it’s the way St. Louis is winning right now—the rush is stifling, and the secondary has been playing clinging coverage. You wondered how long it would take the Rams to assume the personality of the go-for-broke Williams, and it looks like they’re there now.

Oh, I did wonder how long it would take for the Rams' defense to assume the personality of Gregg Williams? I wasn't sure if I wondered this or not, but it appears I did.

Special Teams Players of the Week

Tavon Austin, wide receiver/returner/Jet Sweeper, St. Louis. The Rams won’t say they’re disappointed with Austin since making him their first pick of the 2013 draft, but entering Sunday’s game the electric player from West Virginia had but six touchdowns in 24 career games. Not good enough for a guy who cost St. Louis four picks to move up in the draft. But he showed in Washington how valuable he can be. His 78-yard punt return capped the scoring in a 24-0 shutout, and he added seven touches for 60 yards.

One of those picks the Rams gave up to the Bills is a second round pick they used to get Kiko Alonso. Otherwise, the Bills didn't do much with the 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and 7th round picks they received in return for giving up a 1st and 3rd round pick.

“If I have to motivate pro football players to play a pro football game, then we need to get new pro football players.”

—Washington coach Jay Gruden, after the 24-0 loss to St. Louis.

I'm still afraid that Daniel Snyder thought he was hiring Jon Gruden when he hired Jay Gruden to be the Redskins' head coach.

“You know who votes for that. They don’t seem to see eye-to-eye with me, which is cool. And if I’m not, I’ll still live.”

—Marshawn Lynch, in an interview with former Seattle teammate Michael Robinson for NFL Network, on his chances to someday make the Pro Football Hall of Fame.

Ah, the old media-has-a-problem-with-me-and-it’ll-be-a-factor-in-barring-me-from-Canton line of thinking, from the 39^th-leading rusher of all time. Interesting.

Ah, the old sarcasm-from-a-Pro-Football-Hall-of-Fame-voter line of thinking where he mentions that Marshawn Lynch is the 39th-leading rusher of all time as if Lynch's career is done today. It's interesting because Peter is already hinting that Lynch doesn't deserve to be in the Hall of Fame when Lynch is only 28 years old. But I'm sure the Pro Football Hall of Fame voters won't pay attention to which players they enjoyed speaking with when it comes time for voting. Of course not.

“The shame of it is, I’m not sure they care about Michael Brown or anything else. This was a reason to protest and to go out and loot. Is this the way to celebrate the memory of Michael Brown? Is this an excuse to be lawless? Somebody has to tell me that. I don’t understand it. I understand what the Rams’ take on this was. I’m embarrassed for the players more than anything. They want to take a political stand on this? Well, there are a lot of other things that have happened in our society that people have not stood up and disagreed about. I wasn’t in Ferguson. I don’t know exactly what happened. But I know one thing: If we dismantle and limit the power of our policemen any more than we have already, then we’re going to have a lot of problems in this country. What do you do if someone pulls a gun on you or is robbing a store and you stop them? I don’t want to hear about this hands-up crap. That’s not what happened. I don’t know exactly what did happen, but I know that’s not what happened. This policeman’s life is ruined. Why? Because we have to break somebody down. Because we have to even out the game. I don’t know. I don’t get it. Maybe I’m just old fashioned.”

—Mike Ditka, to the Chicago Sun-Times, on the five Rams players who showed their support for the Ferguson protesters by coming out for the game eight days ago with their hands raised.

This is a great quote. Mostly because I can't wait until I get to the age where no matter what I have said before or how little/much sense it made, I will just end my statement with "Maybe I'm old fashioned" and then close the book on the discussion. This quote doesn't make a hell of a lot of sense to me, but I just want to be at the point where I say random things that lack clarity and end it with "Maybe I'm old fashioned." This is my God-given right as an American citizen.

At Washington on Sunday, St. Louis coach Jeff Fisher sent out as captains for the game Janoris Jenkins, Michael Brockers, Zac Stacy, Alex Ogletree, Stedman Bailey and Greg Robinson.

Coincidence that all six players came as draft picks in the trade for Robert Griffin III, who was standing on the opposite sideline? I think not.

And yes, that is an awesome move by Jeff Fisher. I'll even leave the "8-8" off his name for this great attempt at trolling. 

If Aaron Rodgers and the Packers beat Atlanta tonight at Lambeau Field, Rodgers and Brett Favre would have identical records (68-32) in their first 100 NFL regular-season starts.

And Rodgers has about 50 less interceptions in that time span as well. Favre had 116 interceptions in his first 109 games started in the NFL, while Rodgers had 55 prior to starting his 100th game.

Chip Kelly Wisdom of the Week
The Eagles’ coach, on the rumors that go with a formerly successful college coach being successful in the NFL but always linked to college jobs at this time of year—but to a lesser degree about being happy wherever you are, in whatever job you have:      

“Our whole mantra around here is, ‘Be where your feet are,’ and my feet are right here and that’s all we ever talk about. I can’t control what other people think or other people write. I’ve never been concerned with it; never will be concerned with it. I’ve been happy—I’ve been very, very fortunate in my career. Everywhere I’ve been in my career has been a great situation. I had an unbelievable opportunity when I was at New Hampshire and I loved it there and could have stayed there for the rest of my life. And then same thing at Oregon. I loved Oregon; I loved those players … I loved that group; I loved that coaching staff. I loved being in Oregon; I loved everything about it, but I had an opportunity to come here. I’ve been very happy everywhere I’ve been and I’m happy with being here now.”

This is more rambling than it is wisdom. If Peter really read/listened to what Chip Kelly was saying he would know that Kelly is essentially stating that he is always happy where he is until he gets a better coaching opportunity. So basically, Kelly loved New Hampshire and loved Oregon, but he got better opportunities. So he's always going to be happy where he is until he finds a better opportunity. So this quote essentially means nothing and applies to nearly every head coach. Nick Saban is always happy where he is until he finds a better job. The same goes for every other head coach.

Winston has the field presence and body type of Andrew Luck. 

Don't do Andrew Luck like that. Jameis Winston is not Andrew Luck. Winston can be a great NFL quarterback, but he isn't Andrew Luck at Stanford. 

What’s going to be very interesting in the next few months is to see how NFL teams process the numbers. They favor Mariota, particularly the stark interception number. In three full seasons, Mariota has thrown 12 interceptions.

I'm not a scout, but it seems running ability, decision-making, and intangibles favor Mariota. While the measurables and throwing arm favor Winston, though Mariota does have 101 touchdown passes in his career. I know what my pick would be if I HAD to make one.

Ten Things I Think I Think

1. I think this is what I liked about Week 14:

a. Eli Manning starting his 175th consecutive game (including playoffs). Only nine full seasons to go until he passes Brett Favre (321). Should be easy. Manning would be 42. In his prime.

Manning is only 152 interceptions behind Favre as well. He would have to average 17 interceptions per season until he is 42 years old to pass Favre. That seems more reasonable, though I like that Tom Brady and Peyton Manning COMBINED only have 35 more career interceptions (371) than Favre had (332).

b. Cam Newton’s well-placed touchdown throw to Kelvin Benjamin to put the Saints behind the 8-ball early in New Orleans. Newton has taken too much of the blame for the bare-cupboard offense he was given.

Get out of here with your logic and reason. It's a coincidence that the one game where his offensive line protected him the Panthers offense scored 41 points.

d. Manti Te’o, with a near-interception and then a real interception in the last six minutes of the first half Sunday night.

It was a real interception by Te'o! Peter isn't making this up or anything like that. It was real.

i. Ryan Tannehill, knowing when to run.

But he does know when to hold them, know when to fold them or know when to walk away? Does Tannehill count his touchdowns while he's still on the field? He should know there's time for celebrating after the play is over.

j. Joique Bell, knowing how to run at the goal line.

Pro Tip: Use your legs to run towards the end zone and push as hard as you can if you happen to encounter a defender.

v. Reggie Bush, for having the courage of his convictions to wear the “I CAN’T BREATHE” T-shirt at Ford Field Sunday.
Interesting choice coming from a guy who admits to severely punishing his one year old child for misbehaving. Apparently there wasn't a "I'm standing up for a good social issue, but also lack a bit of self-awareness" T-shirt.

2. I think this is what I didn’t like about Week 14:

d. Vikes corner Captain Munnerlyn’s mugging of Jets wideout Jeremy Kerley, the easiest interference call.

Yeah, but he'll make a great play or interception and totally make you forget about this mistake. Captain giveth, Captain taketh away.

e. Man, Brian Hoyer doesn’t get much help from his receivers.
f. Man, Brian Hoyer overthrew a wide-open Taylor Gabriel by seven yards. That negated an easy touchdown.

While "e" is true, it probably doesn't help to prove Peter's point that he placed "f" directly below it. Hoyer doesn't get help from his receivers, but it sounds the lack of help could go both ways here.

j. Anyone still anointing Jimmy Graham?

Charmin may be anointing him their new spokesman. The difference in physicality in Graham and Rob Gronkowski is very interesting. I don't know if Graham was having a bad day, but he heard footsteps at least twice on Sunday and it resulted in a dropped pass both times.

p. My Lord, this is not something from this week, but how about this Thursday night game 10 days from now: Tennessee at Jacksonville.

At least it may be a competitive football game, which is more than other Thursday night matchups could say.

3. I think almost every year there’s a stunner in January—a coach we never thought would be parting ways with his team for whatever reason. That coach this season could be Sean Payton. Things just don’t seem right in New Orleans right now.

The Saints would be stupid to fire Sean Payton. Every team is allowed a bad year...or at least should be allowed a bad year. I can't live in a world where Sean Payton is fired while having two losing seasons out of 8 years as a head coach.

6. I think the headline of the week belongs to stlouisrams.com: “Punters Get Paid Like People Too,” after they rewarded versatile punter Johnny Hekker with a six-year, $18 million contract extension. I love this contract for St. Louis. Hekker is certainly worth 2 percent of the Rams’ cap space, especially because of how valuable he’s been in the fakery aspect of the punt team since arriving in St. Louis.

Hekker is 17th in punting average, 5th in net punting average, 2nd in punts inside the 20-yard line, and 5th in return average. So he's a pretty good punter, but of course a lot of those punting statistics are dependent on his punt coverage team. For example, Carolina's punt coverage team is horrendous and it shows in the statistics for Brad Nortman.

Then Peter transcribes Fran Tarkenton's comments about Robert Griffin. Never has there been a retired quarterback who may be more right, but also should probably shut up more than Tarkenton. He's probably right in some ways about Griffin, but I don't know why the media keeps going to him for juicy quotes. I think I just answered my own question.

10. I think these are my non-NFL thoughts of the week:

a. So, a quick baseball story here: Russell Wilson’s attorney, Mark Rodgers, is also the agent for relief pitcher Andrew Miller. In early October, when chatter about the off-season free-agent market was taking shape, Rodgers mentioned to me, knowing I liked baseball, that he thought Miller could get four years for more than $8 million per. “I think we can get him $9 [million] a year,” Rodgers said two months ago. On Friday, the Yankees signed Miller to a four-year, $36-million deal. Talk about knowing your market. That’s amazing.

I don't know if this is amazing. Rodgers said he thought he could get Miller $9 million per year and so that was obviously the price he was asking teams who wanted to sign Miller to meet. A team met that price, so Miller is now a member of said team (Yankees). It's Rodgers' job to know the market and the fact he nailed exactly what he thought for Miller goes to show that knows the market. Amazing? No. Doing his job? Yes.

c. As for shortstop Didi Gregorius, who batted .226 with a .290 on-base for Arizona in 299 plate appearances and was benched and later farmed out at age 24 last season: I don’t know many great players, or even borderline all-star ones, who were on their third team by age 24 (Cincinnati, Arizona, Yanks). I don’t see any annual all-stars playing at short for Cincinnati, or looming at short for Arizona.

Well, Peter is a renowned baseball expert so I can't help but think he's 100% right about this. Especially since they don't play defense in the American League, so there is no sense in factoring defense in as part of the evaluation of Gregorious. Why would defense count as part of Gregorius' skill set? That's crazy talk.

j. There are about 10 movies I want to see, but Unbroken, The Imitation Game and Foxcatcher—those are the three I vow to see by the end of the holidays.

Okay, thanks for the information on what movies you plan on seeing. I will be sure to not hold you to this.

o. Not saying Saturday night’s Heisman award ceremony is anticlimactic or anything, but anyone who has his team in the race for the national title, with a 38-to-2 touchdown-to-interception ratio, would seem to a pretty hands-down pick.

I can barely tell you who won the Heisman Trophy a few years ago. From what I remember, there haven't been too many exciting races for the Heisman Trophy where there couldn't be a reasonable guess made Saturday morning about who would win the award that evening.

r. My college football final four: 1, Alabama; 2, Oregon; 3, Florida State; 4, Ohio State.

So......pretty much the same final four teams as the committee picked? Thanks for your contribution and be sure to update us on all the movies you see over the holidays.

t. Five big conferences, four playoff spots. That’s where the problems in the four-team playoff begin. And as my peer Pete Thamel wrote for SI.com Saturday night: “In the giddy excitement that came with getting rid of the two-team BCS in favor of the four-team playoff, many overlooked a potential fatal flaw. The vague criteria essentially allows the selection committee to make up the rules as it goes along.” Which is why Baylor and TCU were screaming Sunday afternoon after the naming of the field. But whatever the criteria, let’s face it: A four-team playoff was always going to make three or four teams that didn’t make it go crazy.

There will always be controversy. The NCAA Tournament has 68 teams that make it into the field and there is STILL whining that some teams get left out. There could be a 64 team playoff and the 65th and 66th team would still feel upset they weren't included.

As I said higher in the column, if the Packers beat the woebegone playoff contenders tonight, Aaron Rodgers will have an identical record after 100 starts (68-32) as Brett Favre. What’s notable in the comparison between the two quarterbacks is the edge Rodgers has statistically. These numbers include only games each quarterback started, not the mop-up stuff each did before beginning their starting careers:

Player	Starts	W-L	Comp.	Att.	Pct.	Yards	TD-Int	TD-Int diff.	Rating
Rodgers	99	67-32	2,176	3,276	.660	27,193	219-54	+165	107.1
Favre	100	68-32	2,094	3,400	.616	24,079	194-104	+90	89.2

The rules that favor the quarterback had an impact on Rodgers' statistics being more impressive than Favre's, but Rodgers is still the better quarterback 100 starts into his career. Can't tell Peter that though.

However, in Most Valuable Player awards won by the time of their 100^th starts:

Favre: 3 
Rodgers: 1

I'm not going to comment on this because my head might explode.

Favre was a great player early, and Rodgers has been a great player early, one generation apart. There’s good reason if you’re a Favre fan to say Favre was better,

Other than the "It's a different time now than it was when Favre made his first 100 starts" reasoning, I don't see how a person could claim Favre was the better quarterback 100 starts into his career. Rodgers has a better completion percentage, more yards, better TD:INT ratio and a better rating.

and a good reason today to say Rodgers is better.

The good reason being because he is better 100 starts into his career. It's not a knock against Favre, but just a reality shown in the statistics. There is always the "Different time" argument of course.

The Adieu Haiku
Watt for MVP? Can’t see it. Today, I take …
12. Mister Cheesehead.

Again, can there be a vote on whether the "Adieu Haiku" stays or not? Why is there a vote on whether the video of Peter discussing NFL-related issues on the THE MMQB site stays or not, but we can't vote on the use of haikus in a football column?