Showing posts with label this column was unwanted. Show all posts
Showing posts with label this column was unwanted. Show all posts

Thursday, November 27, 2014

4 comments In Honor of Thanksgiving, Gregg Easterbrook Invites The Truth Over For a Meal and Later Murders It With His Lies and Deception

Well, it turns out Gregg Easterbrook's Authentic Games Super Bowl selection from the AFC just lost to the Raiders. It's a good thing that Gregg's Authentic Games metric changes every week, because now he has a few more chances to correctly guess the Super Bowl matchup. Actually, no worries, because Gregg's Authentic Games metric doesn't care that the Chiefs just lost to the worst team in the NFL. What a great metric to determine the best teams in NFL! This week Gregg is thankful for exciting games on Thanksgiving, updates his Authentic Games standings, and really I could stop writing now because here's the column. It's TMQ. It sucks and frustrates me. It probably always will. But hey, it's Thanksgiving weekend so I will find one thing in this column that I am thankful for. That is my vow.

Many Thanksgiving Day games have been woofers. Not 2014. This year, Thanksgiving offers playoffs in November.

It's only November and Gregg is talking about the playoffs taking place? Is this 2014 NFL Playoffs Creep? How dare Gregg Easterbrook become a part of the 2014 NFL Playoffs Creep. He should be ashamed of himself.

Philadelphia Eagles at Dallas Cowboys pairs 8-3 teams and will decide first place in the NFC East. Seattle Seahawks at San Francisco 49ers pairs 7-4 teams and, considering this season's wild-card logjam, is close to an elimination contest for both clubs.

Nope, it's "close" to an elimination contest in that it isn't at all an elimination contest because there will still be four games played after this one.

Philadelphia-Dallas should be an entertaining shootout, matching the league's fourth- and sixth-ranked offenses. The winner will hold first place in the division. The loser will be 8-4, 

Watch out! Gregg can count!

A shoddy team from the NFC South will host a postseason contest while several winning NFC teams do not receive a postseason invitation. The Boys-Birds losers get an inside track to a wild card. But the Boys-Birds losers need to go 3-1 down the stretch, since a 10-win season is not likely to cut it in the NFC this season.

The Boys-Birds loser has the inside track to a wild card until they lose their next two games, in which case they won't make the playoffs. My point is this is an important game, but it's not like if the Eagles win then they will have the NFC East or even a wild card spot locked up. The game is important, but there's no "inside track" to a wild card here, because the winner of Seattle-San Francisco will also be 8-4. If the Cardinals win the NFC West and the winner of the Seattle-San Francisco game wins their next game and the Eagles lose their next game (after beating the Cowboys on Thanksgiving), while the Cowboys win their next game, then all three teams will be 9-4 and the "inside track" doesn't exist. My point is there is still 25% of the games to be played after Thanksgiving day.

Tension is higher in the Seattle-Santa Clara contest. These teams met for last season's NFC title, a down-to-the-wire event many considered the real Super Bowl of last season.

Oh really? "Many" considered this game the real Super Bowl and were discounting the 15-3 Denver Broncos led by a Hall of Fame quarterback and the best offense in NFL history? I must have forgotten that "many" were simply discounting the Broncos. I learn so much reading TMQ.

Now both are staring at the taillights of the Arizona Cardinals. The loser of this Bluish Men Group-Squared Sevens game will have five defeats and likely need to win out for a wild-card berth. Athletes boast about winning out, but it's not a good master plan, especially since Seattle and Santa Clara face each other again in two weeks.

Maybe I'm stupid, but did Gregg write that "winning out" meaning, "Winning the rest of the games they play" is NOT a good master plan? I don't think either team is planning on losing Thursday evening just so they have the chance to try and win out the rest of the games. So no, the master plan probably will never be to lose a game and then try to win the rest of the games.

Will the home field equate to Detroit, Dallas and Santa Clara wins?

Yes, they will Gregg. There's no point in even playing the games because the home team is definitely going to win.

Not necessarily. Since the three-game Thanksgiving format was implemented in 2006, turkey-day hosts are 13-11. 

Whaaaaaaaat? Thanks for clearing up the misconception I didn't have about the home field advantage equating to a win for Detroit, Dallas and Santa Clara.

That 54 percent home victor performance on Thanksgiving is below the typical winning share for home teams. For instance, in the 2013 regular season, home teams won 60 percent of the time. And it's well below home-team outcomes for all Thursday games that are not held on Thanksgiving.

Gee, if only there were a way to chalk this up to something. I know! How about pointing out that two of the teams that have played on every Thanksgiving since 2006, Dallas and Detroit, have five winning seasons between them in that time? Maybe the fact two teams that traditionally have played home games on Thanksgiving since 2006 have not been very good during that time? Detroit has only had a winning record once, so it's mostly on them. It would be crazy to chalk up the lower home winning percentage for home teams on Thanksgiving to something as logical as this.

That Detroit always gets a Thanksgiving host date, and the Lions have been awful in many recent seasons, dragging down the turkey-day home team performance statistics. 

See, Gregg DOES come to this conclusion, but only after beating around the fucking bush as much as possible. Rather than just state WHY home teams on Thanksgiving don't have a winning percentage comparable to home teams playing on non-Thanksgiving Thursday, Gregg has to ask the question, beat around the bush about why and then finally get to the right answer. It's like he is killing space, but Gregg wouldn't do that would he? Not when he has all this NFL knowledge just waiting to burst out on to the computer screen.

In other football news, if the playoffs began today, 4-7 Atlanta would host a playoff game while five 7-4 teams -- the Browns, Steelers, 49ers, Lions and Ravens -- would not reach the postseason at all. Why is a seeded playoff format a forbidden thought to the NFL?

Why is Gregg trying to predict which teams will make the playoffs when there are still five games to play? Yet again, Gregg is guilty of 2014 NFL Playoffs Creep. It's only the end of November and Gregg is talking about the playoffs that don't even start until 2015. It's just like showing the Rockettes' Christmas Show in early December or late November. It hasn't happened yet, so don't talk about it or else that's CREEP!

Stats Of The Week No. 5: The AFC North is 28-15-1; the NFC South is 13-30-1

I'm not taking anything away from the AFC North. It is clearly a stronger division this year (and that's important to note. THIS YEAR it is a stronger division. These things are cyclical), but also know that the AFC North is playing the NFC South head-to-head, so these records may be exacerbated by one of the best divisions playing one of the worst divisions during the season. It doesn't matter. The NFC South sucks, but it's important to know that these two divisions are playing each other this year.

Stats of the Week No. 8: Atlanta is 4-0 versus the NFC South, 0-7 versus all other divisions.

See? This puts things in perspective a little bit and helps prove my point. The AFC North is 10-1-1 against the NFC South this year. Obviously those games can't be removed, but when not playing the NFC South the AFC North is 18-14, while the NFC South is 12-20 against other divisions. This is still a terrible number, but puts the AFC North record in a little more perspective.

The Broncos seem to have a playbook just for deuce tries: under Peyton Manning, Denver is 4-of-5 when going for two.

Or the Broncos just have a really good Hall of Fame quarterback who is good at converting two-point conversions.

Touts lauded the return of Josh Gordon, with 120 receiving yards. Two of Brian Hoyer's three interceptions were errant throws targeted to Gordon. in both instances he might have broken up the pass but instead just watched passively as the ball was picked off. When a pass is errant, a wide receiver should turn into a defensive back. Gordon seems to consider this beneath him.

I like how Gregg's takeaway from these two plays is to blame the receiver for not turning into a defensive back and he doesn't blame Brian Hoyer for throwing the fucking errant pass. Maybe Josh Gordon should have played defense better, but Hoyer threw the damn interception. Most of the blame should go to him.

More importantly, Gregg is performing his weekly lying and deceiving tricks. Someone please tell me how the holy hell Josh Gordon was supposed to "turn into a defensive back" and stop this interception from happening. Was he supposed to turn into fucking Superman and fly ahead to push the Falcons player away from the football? It was well overthrown and Gordon couldn't have broken up the pass. As usual, Gregg wants to criticize and hope no one follows up to see if he's misleading his audience or not.

Now it's Detroit leading 3-0 at New England. The Flying Elvii face third-and-goal on the Lions 4. Presnap, Detroit is confused -- linebacker Josh Bynes is gesturing madly to the secondary. Just call time out! Continuing to gesticulate, Bynes turned his back on the opponents. Word to the wise: Do not turn your back on Tom Brady. He immediately signaled for the snap and threw an easy touchdown pass to tight end Tim Wright, the man Bynes should have guarded.

While agreeing with the point Gregg is trying to make, this isn't fucking basketball. There may be no player that Bynes is supposed to "guard." Sometimes defensive players don't have players they "guard" because this isn't basketball and teams run defensive schemes that are zone schemes. But of course, Gregg doesn't know this and just assumes defensive players are always "guarding" a man.

Also, I think Gregg meant to call him "hard-working undrafted free agent" Josh Bynes. I'm sure it's coincidence he didn't mention Bynes' draft position.

One other thing. Gregg doesn't think anyone can look at video to prove he is misleading his readers. Look. Bynes back was not to Tom Brady. He was looking at Brady at the snap. He went right and should have gone left.

The next time New England reached the Lions' 4, Wright split wide. Across from him was safety Glover Quin, who, being a safety, won't get any safety help; at any rate there wasn't any other defensive back on that side of the field who didn't have a man to guard. At the snap, Wright did a quick down-and-out. Quin stood like a piece of topiary, covering no one, as Wright scored again. 

This is a perfect example of Gregg Easterbrook criticizing an NFL team while not recognizing the type of defense that team was running. I know it's shocking to Gregg, but he is wrong sometimes. First off, the ball was on the Lions' 8 yard line not the 4 yard line, so Gregg is factually incorrect as usual. Second, Quin was in zone coverage. He clearly didn't just stand there, he was in his zone with a linebacker in front of him also running zone coverage. Also, there was no "guarding" because it was a zone defense. The defenders were guarding a zone, not a man. And for the third thing that Gregg was wrong about on this play, there WAS another defensive back on that side of the ball who didn't have anyone to cover in his zone. There was no other Patriots player on the screen in the left side of the end zone when Tim Wright caught that pass.

So Gregg has managed to get the yardage, the Lions' coverage, and his description of this play incorrect. Basically, there was nothing about the Patriots' touchdown that he described accurately. I'm sure many of his loyal readers will simply believe Gregg Easterbrook isn't misleading them and go spout off knowledge about how Lions' defenders didn't "guard" their man. Such is life with a trusted writer who misleads and lies to his audience in order to churn out a weekly column.

Last week at Indianapolis, the Patriots huddled up and mostly ran a heavy package of two tight ends and a fullback. That's the film Detroit looked at during the week.

Gregg claims to know the exact film the Lions watched during the week. Knowing the Patriots change offensive tactics on a weekly basis, I find it hard to believe the Lions only watched last week's game tape. But hey, Gregg makes up shit knows more than I do, right?

Sunday, New England used a no-huddle hurry-up with four or five wide. The game was a 1 p.m. start in late November, which means declining winter sun may be in a receiver's eyes. From about Veterans Day on, the coach who leaves nothing to chance sends someone to the field the day before the game to chart the sun, as perceived from the field, as it declines during the hours of the contest. Sunday, in the second quarter, a Detroit receiver was sent deep where, looking back, the sun was blinding: drop. New England passes went to shaded areas of the field.

Gregg wants to know why NFL teams have such a large staff? There's the justification for NFL teams having such a large staff. Somebody has to chart the sun.

"The Hunger Games: Mockingjay -- Part 1" just opened, the most recent in the doomsday genre that has assimilated Hollywood, television and novel writing. The "Hunger Games" books and movies denounce use of violence for mass entertainment. And hey, come be entertained by the glorified violence! 

I haven't read the books, but my understanding is that "The Hunger Games" movie is a work of fiction that isn't intended to portray a life lesson, so who gives a flying shit?

Then there's "Snowpiercer." Marketed as a highbrow, philosophical doomsday film, "Snowpiercer" contains a stark warning to humanity: After the apocalypse, nothing will make sense. Some kind of environmental blunder triggered an instant ice age that killed all but a few thousand people. They endlessly ride around the planet aboard a huge train powered by a perpetual motion engine that requires no fuel. If the world was suddenly covered with ice, why were capital and resources devoted to building a train track rather than, say, protective structures? Future technology can devise a perpetual motion engine, yet everyone has forgotten about power plants that burn coal to generate heat.

It's almost as if this movie is a work of fiction and any attempt at extracting reality from the movie is the fault of the person attempting to extract this reality.

The economics make least sense. The deep philosophical part is that the poor live in the back of the train, the middle class in the middle and the 1 percent in luxury up front. If society collapsed, wouldn't the money held by the rich become worthless?

Yes Gregg, but the power they have is still worth a lot. Power is the real money. Surely Gregg Easterbrook understands this principle. He is well-paid to write TMQ, so people think because he has this power it means he is smarter than the average football fan. See, the power Gregg has by writing TMQ means he is given qualities that he wouldn't otherwise have if TMQ was written by some dude on a blog.

Trailing 17-0 at Philadelphia, Tennessee punted on fourth-and-1 from its 34. Trailing 27-17, the Flaming Thumbtacks took the field goal on fourth-and-goal from the Nesharim 2. Tennessee entered the contest 2-8, yet coach Ken Whisenhunt used hyper-conservative tactics as if holding a late lead in the Super Bowl.

And to be clear, if a team used hyper-conservative tactics holding a late lead in the Super Bowl then Gregg would criticize that team for using hyper-conservative tactics. So Gregg doesn't really even agree with his comparison for how Whisenhunt was coaching.

Trailing 7-3 in the second quarter at New England, Detroit faced fourth-and-goal on the Patriots 2, and took the field goal. New England entered the contest as the league's second highest-scoring team -- touchdowns, not field goals, defeat high-scoring teams.

Pulling within 24-21 with 3:23 remaining versus Green Bay, Minnesota prepared to kick off following roughing the passer on a deuce. That meant the Vikings teed up on the 50-yard line. Onside! Onside! Worst-case for an onside from midfield just isn't that bad.

Two important points I believe Gregg misses:

1. He just stated that touchdowns, not field goals defeat high-scoring teams. Giving the Packers, another high-scoring team, a short field is also not a way to defeat a high-scoring team.

2. An onside kick does seem smart here, unless the Packers were expecting an onside kick, in which case the odds of success decrease. Gregg seems to consistently have difficulty understanding the success of an onside kick often depends on whether it is expected by the opposing team or not. If the Packers expect the onside kick here, the odds of success decrease.

Why Do Corners Look Into The Backfield? TMQ complains about corners looking into the backfield. Prep and college players may do this owing to lack of experience. Why do NFL players do it?

Cornerbacks will sometimes try to read the quarterback's eyes, but I think most of the time Gregg claims a cornerback "looks into the backfield" that the corner is usually not playing man defense and is in zone coverage of some sort. As I showed earlier, Gregg is terrible at figuring what defenses are run in the NFL, so I'm quite certain he's mistaken "looking into the backfield" for being in zone coverage. As always, Gregg's football knowledge is great as long as you don't look into the claims he makes in TMQ.

On T.Y. Hilton's 73-yard touchdown reception that led to his "cradle the baby" celebration, Jacksonville corner Dwayne Gratz was busy looking into the backfield as Hilton blew past. NFL corners know that future bonus offers will be heavily influenced by their interception numbers.

Does Gregg even know what he's talking about? "Future bonus offers will be heavily influenced by their interception numbers." What "bonus offers"? Is he talking about a contract extension? If so, the signing bonus the player receives isn't determined by only interceptions.

Looking into the backfield is a way to generate interceptions -- the corner may be able to read the quarterback's eyes and jump a short out. If looking into the backfield generates an interception, the corner benefits; if it causes a long pass completion, too bad for the team.

Gratz was not looking in the backfield, but was running either short man coverage or zone and expected safety help over the top. Look at the video. At the end of the video, the analyst even says, "Dwayne Gratz, wasn't totally his fault. His safety didn't help him."

It simply annoys me that there are idiots who read TMQ who will go around spouting bullshit about corners "looking into the backfield" because they think Gregg Easterbrook knows what the hell he is talking about, which he clearly doesn't. Gratz expected safety help and it is clear from looking at the coverage the Jaguars were running that he wasn't in man coverage on Hilton. Yet, Gregg keeps spewing nonsense in the place of facts.

Nobody likes to think about this stuff. In the short term these problems can be ignored, and the American political system is good at ignoring problems. But the longer pension reforms are put off, the worse the bailouts will be.

The Netherlands has a secure pension system because each generation is required to pay for itself. In the United States, the retired expect to be subsidized by the young. Millennials, why aren't you rebelling against this?

Because the retired and those going to be retired soon are the people holding the power. There aren't too many Millennials in Congress who can push through pension reform. But great question that ignores one of the most obvious answers. It's kind of hard to make changes when those in power who can make the change are those who also benefit from no change being made.

TMQ Right on a Distressingly Easy Prediction: Last month my Atlantic Monthly article on longevity trends noted that Social Security and Medicare have between $3.2 trillion and $8.3 trillion in unfunded liabilities,

The Dangerous Safety Device: Years ago for the Washington Monthly I did a story about an OSHA mandate that backfired and caused a workplace fatality.

A lot of pimping out of Gregg's other work in this TMQ.

The urban myth of being "thrown clear of the crash" is nonsense: being thrown from a crash makes a person 25 times more likely to die. (Your body is moving 50 miles an hour, passes through a window and then impacts concrete.) "I don't need to buckle up because this is a short trip" is also urban myth. Most traffic fatalities occur within 25 miles of home.

True, but this is probably because most people only drive within 25 miles of their home.

And please don't say "no one can tell me what to do inside my car." That's true if you drive exclusively on private property. State and federal law both are crystal clear that, on public roads, drivers must obey traffic and safety rules.

True, but I believe if I am over the age of 21 then I should be able to decide if I want to wear a safety belt or not. I don't need the government protecting me. But yes, the law says drivers and passengers have to wear a safety belt.

air bags reduce the probability of death by approximately 16 percent in direct-frontal impacts and 9 percent in partial-frontal impacts." Levitt and Price established that seat belts were much more effective than generally assumed, while airbags were overrated.

Why are auto regulators still in love with airbags?

Because even if they are overrated, they can still save lives if the person is wearing a safety belt. So if the regulators will force people to wear seatbelts than they will also think any other option to save lives is worth exploring.

First is that some people refuse to buckle up. Mandating ignition interlocks -- so vehicles won't start until belts are buckled -- is seen as a scandalous idea. Dangerous, expensive airbags are better?

Second is that airbags are seen as a triumph of regulation, and the intellectual left won't give an inch on regulation. Seat belts, and then shoulder harnesses, were the true triumph for regulation -- they've saved large numbers of lives in a cost-effective manner.

Third is that government programs never end. A generation ago there was a huge lobbying fight regarding airbags, resulting in new government programs and a new constituency of bag manufacturers. At this point airbags may have outlived their usefulness, if not actually become a hazard.

Also, now that air bags have been placed in most cars, if manufacturers take them out of the car then there is a perception that the car has just been made less safe. This would obviously affect sales.

Crimson star Andrew Fischer compiled 193 of his team's 404 yards from scrimmage. So maybe, just maybe, the play will be to Fischer. Yale had him single-covered going deep, no safety help. To make matters worse, Bulldogs corner Dale Harris was looking into the backfield trying to guess the play, rather than simply covering his man. 

Since Gregg often lies about whether a corner is looking in the backfield, I'm guessing Dale Harris really wasn't doing this.

TMQ contends that donations to university and college athletic departments should not be tax-deductible, since unlike education, athletics makes no larger contribution to society. No one likes taxes. But when the rich get deductions for donations, average people must be taxed or government debt must rise. Harvard has $36.4 billion endowment, more than double the GDP of Iceland. Why should athletic donations to Harvard, or to any university or college, be supported by average taxpayers?

The tax law which states donations to university and college athletic departments are tax-deductible isn't really in place for Harvard or other schools with huge endowments. It's intended to encourage contributions to smaller or medium sized athletic programs that need and can use the funds. The IRS just can't say, "All contributions to university and college athletic departments are tax-deductible, except for you Harvard. You have too much money already. Any contributions to your athletic department is not tax-deductible."

Last week Kansas City rose to second place, and immediately lost to winless Oakland. But since the Authentic Games Index doesn't recognize the Long Johns, this defeat does not alter the Chiefs' standing.

And yes, Gregg's Authentic Games metric is so useful it doesn't include his AFC Super Bowl participant from last week (and this week) losing to a previously winless team. Why would a loss to the worst team in the NFL hurt the Kansas City Chiefs in the Authentic Games metric? How could losing to the worst team in the NFL have ANYTHING to do with predicting that team's success in the postseason?

Gregg's Super Bowl matchup this week is Arizona versus Denver. Of course, Kansas City has one less loss to authentic teams than the Broncos have, but they lose out because they haven't played as many authentic teams as the Broncos.

My Non-Authentic Games metric has predicted the following Super Bowl matchups so far:

Packers and Broncos
Saints and Dolphins
Packers and Patriots

This week's Non-Authentic Games metric based entirely on which teams in the AFC and NFC won by the largest margin shows the Super Bowl matchup will be the Philadelphia Eagles and Buffalo Bills. So get ready for the matchup in the Super Bowl. Orton versus Sanchez.

Arizona clock management at the end of the first half at Seattle was perplexing. Trailing 9-0, the Cardinals reached third-and-goal on the Seattle 5 with 55 seconds remaining, holding a timeout. Bruce Arians watched as the clock ticked down to 19 seconds, then called the timeout. Huh? That meant Arizona was sure to attempt a pass into the end zone, as it did, incompletion -- the odd use of clock assured the Bluish Men Group they didn't have to defend a rush.

The Cardinals were holding a timeout, so why does this mean a pass attempt was assured? The Cardinals could easily have tried to run the football and then called timeout. Gregg is using hindsight to say that a pass was assured, but the Cardinals easily could have run the football from the five-yard line with one timeout. Sometimes I don't even understand what Gregg is thinking. He tends to just make up a reality to fit the criticism he wants to make.

The Blizzard of 1979 pretty much shut down Chicago for about two weeks and had lingering impacts for a month. Snow removal efforts were terrible despite lavish federal emergency aid; much of the CTA failed; the city's political machine was discredited, opening the door to Byrne. Three monster blizzards have hit Chicago in the postwar period, and all three been poorly handled. Yet Chicago is not widely viewed as a blizzard city.

Then there's Buffalo. The hard-to-believe seven-foot snowfall in parts of the Buffalo area (most totals are much lower, "lake effect" snow can vary significantly over short distances) is perhaps best appreciated in this photo, unless you prefer the drone perspective. Most Buffalo area public schools reopened today, one week after the blizzard. Chicago needed two weeks for basic recovery (schools open, plowing of side streets) from less than two feet of snow, Buffalo recovered faster from more than double the snowfall. Having lived in both Buffalo and Chicago, I can attest that Buffalo handles snow better, and endures less disruption of daily life from snow, than Chicago.

Yet Buffalo is viewed as a blizzard capital while Chicago is viewed as merely windy.

Chicago is viewed as merely windy probably because they don't get as many snowstorms during a given year as Buffalo. So Chicago doesn't handle snow as well because it seems the city infrastructure isn't as well-equipped to handle large amounts of snow as the city infrastructure in Buffalo is equipped to handle large amounts of snow.

If snowstorms ruin your day, you'd be better off in Buffalo than in Chicago -- since in Buffalo, snow rapidly is plowed and shoveled.

Yes, it's better to be in a snowstorm while located in a city that is used to handling snowstorms. Thanks for the information Gregg. I wouldn't have been able to figure this out without your help.

The Football Gods Will Smile Upon Him: On the final first half snap of Cleveland versus Atlanta, the Browns attempted a 60-yard field goal. Devin Hester was back to return a missed long field goal, which happened; got most of the way down the field and had only the holder to beat for a touchdown with time expired; Browns offensive lineman Joel Bitonio, who weighs 305 pounds, hustled like crazy to catch Hester from behind.

I think Gregg means "highly-paid glory boy and second round pick" Joel Bitonio hustled to catch Hester. Because Bitonio was drafted in the second round, Gregg won't be mentioning his draft position because it might ruin the narrative that highly-drafted players don't hustle like undrafted and lowly drafted players do.

Last week, TMQ complained of timid play calling by Buffalo coach Doug Marrone on fourth-and-short. In the second quarter, Bills facing fourth-and-short on the Jersey/B 45, Marrone went for it, and the try failed. The failed fourth-and-short was Buffalo's biggest down of the game! This column contends that sometimes it's better to try and fail -- this communicates to players that their coach is challenging them to win -- than to launch a timid punt. After the failed fourth-and-short, the Bills outscored the Jets 31-0.

It's better to try and fail because this communicates to players that the coach is challenging his team to win...except in situations like last week when Gregg criticized the Saints for not "doing a little dance" to convert the fourth down. It turns out that going for it on fourth-and-short challenges a coach's team to win only in cases where that team ended up winning the game. Funny how that works isn't it?

Manly Man Plays of the Week: Game tied 7-7, Santa Clara, hosting the Potomac Drainage Basin Indigenous Persons, faced fourth-and-2 at midfield with 11 seconds remaining, holding a time out. The "safe" thing to do is to punt. Harbaugh/West  called for a deep pass, complete, Niners field goal on the final snap of the half.

Yeah, but WHO CAUGHT THIS PASS, GREGG? WHO? SAY HIS NAME!

From the ESPN game play-by-play of this game:

(:11) (Shotgun) C.Kaepernick pass deep right to M.Crabtree pushed ob at WAS 23 for 25 yards (B.Breeland). 0-yds YAC

Michael Crabtree, he of the "Crabtree Curse" and a highly-drafted glory boy who only cares about himself, is the guy who caught this pass. Isn't it interesting how Gregg leaves this little tidbit out of his analysis of this play? It's like Gregg has an agenda he pushes in TMQ. This agenda is mainly to make up some shitty theory in order to explain why a team isn't playing well (instead of actual analysis because Gregg isn't capable of doing this) and then cover up how wrong he was when his theory is proven to be incorrect. It's all about Gregg's ego. He CAN NOT be seen as wrong nor can he allow his readers to see through his bullshit.

Colin Kaepernick and Robert Griffin III, both once viewed as unstoppable,

They've never been viewed as unstoppable. Gregg is exaggerating.

Doomsday movies play in suburban shopping malls to amuse soccer moms; 

That's a little sexist I think. Gregg probably thinks these soccer moms catch the doomsday movies in the afternoon so they can be home in time to cook dinner and make more babies.

Doomsday and computer-generated special effects obviously fit together nicely, while dystopias create the sort of simplistic good-versus-evil contrasts beloved by scriptwriters. If a future society is run by cackling villains, that's a lot easier to write than a future run by the conscientious.

Considering these movies and books are written to be entertaining, it's also a lot more entertaining to have an actual antagonist in a story rather than a story about nice people running the future with no conflict and drama.

The Football Gods Chortled: Three days after being on the cover of Sports Illustrated, breakout Patriots star Jonas Gray was benched, active for the Detroit game but never sent in.

Again, Gregg misleads his readers. I believe he means "unwanted and undrafted" Jonas Gray. Also, Gray isn't a star because he played well in one game. Geez. Cut back on the exaggerations.

Raiders Mathematically Alive to Finish 6-10: Kansas City had just defeated the defending champion Seahawks and was looking past the 0-10 Raiders to this Sunday's confrontation with Denver.

Gregg's ability to read minds comes through again.

Miami leading 21-17 at Denver facing third-and-10 at the Broncos 12, Ryan Tannehill dropped to pass.

Well, if Tannehill dropped to pass then he's playing the quarterback position all wrong. It's hard to throw the football from the ground.

Yes, I make grammar mistakes all the time, but is it too much to expect more from a columnist who has an editor and writes for the biggest sports site on the Internet? I don't think so.

He was hit as he threw; the ball bounced off an offensive lineman

Well obviously. He dropped to throw the pass. There's no way he could get the pass over the offensive lineman while on the ground.

Next Week: Tuesday Morning Quarterback gets a chief of staff.

Maybe this chief of staff will convince Gregg to quit misleading his readers by leaving out facts that only serve to protect Gregg's ego and attempt to give Gregg's assertions some authority in the minds of readers through deception. I doubt it. Gregg would probably just hire a chief of staff to gather more information about how unrealistic science-fiction movies and television shows are.

I said I would have to be thankful for something in this column in an attempt to be somewhat positive. Here it is. I'm thankful this column is over...and I'm thankful you guys read the crap I write about the crap Gregg writes.

Monday, January 2, 2012

10 comments TMQ: Gregg Easterbrook's Unwanted Column

This week is my least favorite TMQ of the year. I do not like the unwanted players All-Star list that Gregg compiles every year towards the end of the year. Gregg consistently puts players on the list who were unwanted 5-7 years ago, were unwanted for a reason (they were a bust at one point) and he has a very broad definition of the word "unwanted." For example, Jason Babin is on the list. Being a first round pick and a highly drafted glory boy we all know Gregg Easterbrook would generally consider Babin to be a bust highly paid glory boy, but now when Babin plays well he was "unwanted" and his previous teams should have kept him around. Funny how that works.

As always, Gregg Easterbrook wants it both ways. He wants to criticize a team for drafting an overpaid, highly drafted glory boy like Jason Babin, but then after Babin flourishes with another team, Gregg also wants to criticize Babin's previous teams for not holding on to him. Gregg is an expert at telling NFL teams what they should do after the fact. Gregg has no long term memory and he does absolutely no investigation into WHY a player was unwanted or undrafted. Also, I will do a (shortened) version of my Drew Brees-Miami Dolphins rant everyone is already tired of. Don't act like you aren't excited. Let's get to it.

Tuesday night the NFL announces its Pro Bowl rosters: Megabucks glory-boy types will hear their names called.

Because they tend to outperform undrafted free agents and lower drafted players. This is a fact that Gregg struggles to come to terms with on a weekly basis. Hence we get this unwanted All-Stars column where a second-team offensive tackle (Byron Bell) can be an All-Star simply because he has started a lot of games this year. Who cares if his performance has been average or below average? He was undrafted and unwanted!

But the players who catch TMQ's eye are the unwanted: performers, those who were undrafted, or waived, or both.

I would like to add that in the salary cap era of the NFL, a player being waived doesn't mean a team believes that player isn't very good anymore nor does it mean the player may not potentially be valuable to the team anymore either. It simply means sometimes players make too much money or want too much money as a free agent to be affordable to a team. This is vitally important to understand when evaluating in the salary cap era why a team keeps certain players over other players. Gregg, not surprisingly, fails to grasp this idea. In the salary cap era, a team may want to keep a player, but simply can't due to salary cap restrictions. Gregg pretends he pays heed to the idea of the salary cap, yet fails consistently to do so.

In most of life, hard work and determination are more important than social status or talent.

More evidence, if more was needed, that Gregg Easterbrook sometimes lives in a different America from the rest of us. My college roommate had a saying, "It's who you know and who you blow." Perhaps that's a negative way to look at the world, but in part of life it is true. In the NFL, talent tends to get drafted over players who are perceived as having less talent and eventually hard work can pay off in the real world as well. You just better hope you aren't competing for the same position at a company against current employees or the relative of an influential employee of that company.

That's why Tuesday Morning Quarterback lauds hard work and determination on the part of football players who were not born into success, but reached success through constant effort.

Let's be clear here. Nearly every single NFL player was a superstar at some level, even if it wasn't in college. So these players weren't born into success, but at some point in their career most NFL players were big fishes in little ponds at the very least.

First, the Tuesday Morning Quarterback Unwanted Players of the Year.

I promise. I will edit this down as much as possible since Gregg and my opinion of what "unwanted" differs so drastically. I also find it ironic that Gregg talks about "Christmas Creep" for most of the NFL season and his readers write in with other stories of events "creeping," yet Gregg gives out his All-Unwanted awards and THE NFL YEAR ISN'T EVEN OVER YET! Is this "Unwanted All-Star Creep?"

Runner-up: Fred Jackson, tailback, Buffalo. Jackson never started a game in high school, being "too small" and "too slow."

Usually when a writer puts words in quotation marks he is actually quoting something that exists in literature. I'd love to see Gregg provide proof that Jackson didn't start a game in high school because he was "too small" and "too slow." This may be true, and I'm not English teacher, but I'm pretty sure if you put words in quotes they need to be an actual quote that exists and not the figment of the writer imagining what was said. Mostly likely Gregg did here what he usually does, which is deceive his readers into believing these were words used on an actual evaluation of Jackson's skill set in high school. He attempts to deceive his readers by putting "too small" and "too slow" in quotes as if this came from a specific evaluation of Jackson in high school.

At the point Jackson broke his leg, he was second in the NFL in rushing and second in total yards from scrimmage, outperforming an array of No. 1-drafted megabucks players.

I don't even know why teams keep first round draft choices on the roster. They should only sign undrafted free agents.

Tuesday Morning Quarterback Unwanted Player of the Year: Doug Baldwin, Seattle. Two rookie wide receivers named Baldwin entered the NFL this season. Jonathan Baldwin, a No. 1 draft selection, has been nearly invisible with his team, the Kansas City Chiefs. Doug Baldwin, undrafted, became the leading receiver for the Seattle Seahawks and also is a special-teams ace, with a punt block that caused a Seattle touchdown on "Monday Night Football."

Doug Baldwin played better for one year than a highly drafted receiver who also had the last name Baldwin. That appears to be Gregg's point.

In other football news, the fans cheered wildly at Lucas Oil Stadium in Indianapolis when the hapless 1-13 Colts scored with 19 seconds remaining to upset the heavily favored Texans. This victory may deprive Indianapolis of first choice in the 2012 draft.

Why do the Colts even want the first choice in the 2012 draft? Shouldn't the Colts win as many games as possible and trade all of their players for 7th round draft picks? After all, why would the Colts want highly drafted, highly paid glory boys when they can get hard working lowly drafted, unwanted players?

If the Colts end up choosing second or third next spring, and Andrew Luck ends up as the only consensus franchise quarterback in the draft -- that could change, of course -- Indianapolis faithful may rue the day they cheered for the upset of the Texans.

I love how Gregg moves notes the worth of highly drafted players when it is convenient for him, but otherwise tries to convince his audience highly drafted players are lazy and don't work as hard as undrafted players.

Then again, perhaps the Indianapolis plan is to stick with Dan Orlovsky long-term. After all, he took over an 0-11 team and has now won two straight.

Of all the options the Colts have, this would by far be the worst option. Sure Gregg, let's ignore Orlovsky's entire body of work to focus on the last two games.

Stats of the Week No. 5: The AFC West has been outscored by 252 points.

And yet, Denver gets to host a home playoff game against 12-4 Pittsburgh. If I could change one thing about the NFL playoffs, this may be it. I just think a team like Pittsburgh, who didn't win their division granted, that went 12-4 in a division with three playoff teams should be rewarded with a home playoff game over an 8-8 team from a weak division. This is a nitpick of course, but if the NFL could change one thing about the playoffs, I think this would be it for me.

Baltimore now leading 17-0, the Browns faced goal-to-go on the Ravens' 3 with 11 seconds remaining until intermission, out of timeouts. Coach Pat Shurmur called a run to Hillis, stuffed; the half expired without Cleveland having time to send out its field goal unit. The CBS announcers mocked Shurmur for not getting a kick launched. But Cleveland trailed by 17 points! The Browns needed a touchdown, and Shurmur thought a rush would surprise a defense that was expecting a fade to the end zone,

The defense was expecting a fade to the end zone...which is why the Ravens stuffed the run to Hillis. I agree with the idea of going for a touchdown, but how can Gregg say the defense was expecting a fade when the Ravens easily stuffed the Browns running play? Doesn't it make sense to believe the Ravens were looking for a running play? Why does Gregg just make up what he believes the defense was looking for?

Jersey/B leading 7-3, Jersey/A faced third-and-10 from its 1-yard line. Eli Manning retreated into his end zone and threw a 10-yard curl to undrafted Victor Cruz, who legged it all 99 yards for a touchdown -- very sweet.

The play lasted 12 seconds, a long time in sports terms, yet no one from Jersey/B caught Cruz. Safety Brodney Pool, who had an angle, quit on the play and began jogging when Cruz was 30 yards from the house.

Pool had "an angle" in that he wasn't going to catch Cruz and would have had to make up 5 yards of distance between him and Cruz in those 30 yards. But yeah Gregg, sure Pool would have caught him. What a lazy bum.

Jersey/B surrendered a safety as defensive tackle Chris Canty bull-rushed past guard Matt Slauson to sack Mark Sanchez: a fitting conclusion to a sour effort all around by the Jets.

Don't you mean highly drafted glory boy Chris Canty bull-rushed lowly drafted, hard working Matt Slauson?

Two Cheers for Ndamukong: Ndamukong Suh soared in your columnist's estimation with the news that last year he gave away $2.6 million, more than any other pro athlete. Donating to charity, education or the arts is among the strongest signs of admirable character.

This is an absolutely admirable act. Don't get me wrong. Gregg is leaving an important part out of this story though. Suh gave $2 million to the University of Nebraska-Lincoln, Suh's alma mater, for a scholarship fund. So this is very admirable, but Suh did give the money back to his alma mater and not an actual "charity," though the funds will be used for scholarships. Suh is a great guy for this still, of course.

Scoring to pull within 27-24 with 1:51 remaining, Miami kicked away rather than onside kick. Yes, the Dolphins held three timeouts. But they were on the road, kicking away to one of the league's most proficient offenses; all New England needed was one first down to drill the clock. Needless to say, that's what happened. Miami had a better (though still long-shot) chance of victory had it onside kicked.

Assuming the Dolphins didn't recover the onside kick, the Dolphins would still have had to stop the Patriots. Statistically, the Dolphins probably weren't likely to recover the onside kick so the Dolphins were trying to ensure they got good field position if they stopped the Patriots. I think the decision to kick the ball away was at least defensible.

But seeking victory is not always first in a coach's mind. Interim head coach Todd Bowles would have known that if he ordered a deep kick, the Dolphins would all but surely lose -- but they would lose only 27-24. The league grapevine would say, "Hey, the Dolphins went into New England in December and only lost by three," improving the odds that Bowles will convert his Miami interim status into the plum job at Miami or elsewhere.

I personally would have kicked an onside kick here, but I can see why Bowles did not. Also, I always love it when Gregg displays his special ability to read a coach's mind as to why he made this or that decision. Gregg is omnipotent and can decipher intent from a single act. Come to think of it, Gregg should have been a criminal attorney since he knows how to decipher intent so well. He could be using his amazing ability to decipher the exact intent of a person for the good of society, but instead he is selfishly using his gift to decipher the intent of NFL and college head coaches.

A Tale of Two Turnovers: On the first Tim Tebow pick-six at Buffalo, the Bills led 26-14; Denver had abandoned its high school-inspired triple-option attack for straight dropback passing. Obviously Tebow isn't ready for this.

He's not ready to throw the football like an NFL quarterback should throw the football? So is the hope just that the Broncos always have the lead so the Broncos can run the type of offense Tebow is ready for? I'm just wondering about this. Tebow has been in the NFL for full two years. If he isn't ready to run a pro-style offense yet, does this bode well for his future?

John Fox continues to make ultra-conservative game management decisions, which hardly helps Tebow.

You mean "John Fox continues coaching like he has coached his entire NFL head coaching career." Remember, a punt is not a bad play.

The pass interference came on an eight-man mega-blitz that backfired badly. The mega-blitz was radioed in by backup defensive coordinator Reggie Herring. Starting defensive coordinator Wade Phillips, still in the hospital, never would have made such a boneheaded call.

Gregg's omnipotence helps him prove yet another point he wants to prove. It's amazing how Gregg can create evidence out of thin air that Wade Phillips NEVER would have made such a boneheaded call and just happens to prove how a terrible "mega-blitz" singlehandedly lost the game for the Texans with this evidence. It's amazing how this works.

Of course "Terra Nova" is just an absurd television show. But since Fox promoted it as the most expensive program ever made, "Nova" merits an absurd level of scrutiny.

FOX didn't market the show as the most expensive program ever made. YOU marketed it in TMQ as the most expensive program ever made. If it weren't for Gregg Easterbrook I would have had no idea how much the show cost. Maybe I'm the only one.

It's the mid-22nd century, yet idioms have not changed. Characters say "I'm done," "a world of hurt," "ginormous," "I'm running late," "back at you" and "clicks" to mean kilometers. Think how different typical speech was in 1873, which was as far backward as "Terra Nova" goes forward. Yet the 22nd century people of "Terra Nova" talk exactly like Southern California mall customers of the present day.

So the smartest thing for the writers to do is to write the dialogue with new words and lingo the audience can't understand or follow? Why the hell didn't the "Terra Nova" writers think of this earlier? You write a show using dialogue the audience can't understand or follow and success should immediately follow, right?

The use of today's lingo not only represented a failure of imagination but a missed marketing opportunity. "Terra Nova" should have contained future slang -- made-up words the characters would use without explanation, that viewers would figure out from context.

Gregg, let's start doing this now. Gregg, you are a fago dindroit. See if you can figure out what I mean.

Made-up vocabulary is a factor in the ratings success of "Game of Thrones."

Well, that and good writing, a built-in audience, and great support from HBO. But yeah, I'm sure it is the made-up words that causes the audience to tune in. I'd love for Gregg to explain why made-up vocabulary and slang used by the characters didn't help "The Wire" out at all in garnering a ton of viewers. Indeed.

Made-up future slang might have entered social-network culture as memes, which would have gotten young people talking about "Terra Nova" and watching so they could be first to hear and use the next bit of future slang.

Or it could have confused the viewing audience who much prefers to have things spelled out to them and don't want to constantly play catch-up on what's being said.

Here are the qualifications for the All-Unwanted All-Pros: A player must have been undrafted, or been waived, or been let go in free agency when his original club made no bona-fide attempt to retain him.

Gregg's criteria fails in that it doesn't tell WHY a player's original club made no bona-fide attempt to retain him. I know this doesn't matter to Gregg, but to consider a player unwanted, wouldn't it make sense to know why his previous team didn't keep to determine if he was unwanted or not? I guess not.

Players who left their teams via trade are not eligible, because the team received something of value in return. Free agents whom their original teams wanted to retain, but could not for salary-cap reasons, are not eligible.

Then a guy like Drew Brees is not unwanted. The Chargers would have loved to kept him, and made him an offer, but they had Philip Rivers. So for salary cap reasons it didn't make sense to pay two quarterbacks like they were going to be the starting quarterback. Yet, Brees shows up on this list year after year.

For example, Wes Welker qualifies as unwanted for going undrafted, then being waived by San Diego. But his trade from Miami to New England does not count, since the Dolphins got draft choices in return.

So in that case he is no longer unwanted and shouldn't be on the list since the Dolphins got value for him. Yet, he is on the list year after year.

In past seasons the undrafted James Harrison has made the All-Unwanted All-Pros. This season Harrison seems so determined to convince people that he is not much of a human being that he has been disqualified from consideration.

So there is a morality clause now?

(If anyone sees a player on the unwanted team we should have a major issue with, please alert me in the comments. I tried to do the players I have a major problem with being unwanted)

Richie Incognito,* Miami (waived by two NFL teams).

Incognito was waived by the Rams after committing two 15 yard personal foul penalties in a game and then having a confrontation with his head coach. Shouldn't the new morality clause take him out of the running for being unwanted? Of course not. Gregg had no idea Incognito got waived for this reason. That would require doing research and having a consistent set of guidelines for Gregg's all-unwanted list.

Fullback: Vonta Leach,* Baltimore (undrafted, waived by three NFL teams. Everywhere Leach goes, two things happen: The team has a great year rushing, and afterward Leach is waived).

Leach has only been waived by two teams and he wasn't waived by the Texans last year. He signed with the Ravens as a free agent after playing for the Texans since 2006. His 3 year $11 million contract wasn't matched by the Texans. Most likely for salary cap reasons. Therefore he probably shouldn't be on this list.

Leach's teams have waived him after a great rushing year exactly zero times. The Saints were 18th in rushing yards in 2005 when they waived Leach.

Quarterback: Drew Brees, New Orleans (let go by San Diego, unwanted when he offered to sign with Miami, later Super Bowl MVP).

Most people know this is a pet peeve of mine. Brees was not signed by the Chargers for salary cap reasons. They offered him a contract. He declined the contract and then the Dolphins didn't offer Brees enough guaranteed money, so Brees went with the team offering the most guaranteed money. That's right. Brees went with the highest offer. The Dolphins wish now they had upped their offer, but Brees was coming off serious shoulder surgery and they didn't feel like they could increase their offer. It was a mistake on their part, but Brees never "offered" to sign with the Dolphins any more than he "offered" to sign with any team that would be willing to give him the most guaranteed money in free agency.

Defensive line: Andre Carter,* New England (had his best year at age 32 after being let go twice);

ONCE. Andre Carter was let go once, by the Washington Redskins in 2011, who were playing him outside of his best position at linebacker. Andre Carter was signed by the Redskins as an unrestricted free agent and chose not to re-sign with the 49ers. So the 49ers didn't let Carter go, he let on his own accord.

Ahmad Brooks, San Francisco (viewed as a bust in Cincinnati);

So Gregg is going to call Brooks "unwanted" when he was a bust in Cincinnati? Doesn't he realize the ridiculousness of calling a player "unwanted" when that player underperformed with his previous team? Sure, the 49ers did well by signing Brooks, but calling Brooks "unwanted" seems to indicate the Bengals did something wrong by getting rid of a player who wasn't performing at a high level.

Charles Woodson, Green Bay (let go by Oakland as "too old," now wears Super Bowl ring and is likely Hall of Fame entrant);

I'd love to see Gregg try to find the quote by the Raiders that called Woodson "too old." He won't find it because Gregg made this quote up. He's essentially lying by putting the words "too old" in quotes since it didn't come from any cited article. He just made this criticism up. In reality, the Raiders didn't franchise Woodson again in 2006 because he didn't want to play in Oakland and was suffering injuries that caused him to not be worth to the Raiders what they had been paying him. Woodson left as an unrestricted free agent, he wasn't let go. Gregg writes great fiction.

Robert Gallery, Seattle (often described as a draft bust because he was the No. 2 choice in 2004 and initially played poorly, needed time to adjust to the NFL);

Hahahaha! Look at Gregg now making excuses for a highly drafted, glory boy when it fits Gregg's need to call that player unwanted. Hilarious. We all know an offensive lineman who played college football for four years and is drafted #2 overall just needs 4-5 years to adjust to the NFL. That's reasonable to Gregg. Gallery is EXACTLY the kind of player Gregg calls a highly paid glory boy on a weekly basis and suggests is too lazy to make it at the NFL level. So Gregg should never criticize a highly drafted player because it may take that player just take a few years to adjust to the NFL. This makes sense, right, since Gregg is making this excuse for Gallery? Of course, Gregg will continue to criticize highly drafted players for not playing well after 1-2 years. This is his rule and his favorite thing to do. It is just when it fits Gregg's need to be right Gregg will change his position. So when Robert Gallery performs well after leaving the team that drafted him, he just needed more time, as well as a switch of positions along the offensive line, to play well in the NFL. Gallery isn't a bad offensive lineman, but it is incredibly ironic to hear Gregg Easterbrook want to give a highly drafted pick "time" to adjust to the NFL because it fits Gregg's agenda.

Brian Waters,* New England (undrafted, released by Kansas City as "too old," realistic shot at the Hall of Fame).

Again, I would love for Gregg to provide the specific quote that he just quoted calling Waters "too old." I don't see how ESPN allows a writer to directly quote something that doesn't fucking exist.

Running backs: Cedric Benson, Cincinnati (practically propelled out of cannon, Chicago was so anxious to waive him);

Because he wasn't a good running back and had two alcohol-related arrests in a five week span. Those types of things are good reasons for a player to be waived.

Adam Carriker, Washington (let go after being a high-number choice at St. Louis)

He was essentially a bust in St. Louis because he didn't meet the Rams expectations of him. In fact, here is what Gregg "The Omnipotent" Easterbrook had to say about Carriker in 2010:

Other players from the 2007 first round -- Ted Ginn, Marshawn Lynch, Adam Carriker, Justin Harrell, Jarvis Moss -- have been busts; all were praised by NFL insiders who supposedly had access to scientific yardsticks.

Gregg outright calls Carriker a bust. So how can he be considered "unwanted?" The hypocritical Gregg Easterbrook, the same guy who wants to criticize a player for being a bust and criticize a team for giving up on a bust too early, said this as well about Carriker:

Shortly before the draft, Les Mouflons traded Adam Carriker, the 13th selection of the 2007 draft, to the Redskins for very little, officially making the St. Louis 2007 draft a fiasco. It was just three years ago and no one from that draft remains on the St. Louis roster. In payment for Carriker, the Rams received an exchange of fifth-round draft selections: Moving up in the fifth round was all that a recent Rams first-round pick was worth. But wait -- as part of the deal, the two clubs also exchanged seventh-round selections, Washington getting the 208th choice of the draft from St. Louis, and giving back the 211th choice. A three-slots difference in the last round is so incredibly minor, it's as if St. Louis tipped the Redskins on the trade: "Here you are my good man, here's your 2007 first-round draft bust, and I've thrown in a little something extra for your troubles."

So Gregg not only criticized Carriker for being a bust, then criticized the Rams for trading 7th round draft picks in the Carriker trade since he was a bust, and now criticizes the Rams for ever getting rid of Carriker in the first place. The moral to this story is Adam Carriker is a bust and major part of the reason the Rams are so bad, unless Carriker starts playing well for another team, in which case the Rams never should have gotten rid of Carriker.

Bart Scott,* Jersey/B (undrafted out of Division I-AA Southern Illinois).

Bart Scott also signed a 6 year $48 million deal as an unrestricted free agent. He is a part of that overly-cocky defense that Gregg seems to despise so much. It doesn't matter much that Scott is highly paid and part of a defense Gregg doesn't like when he is trying to show that Scott is "unwanted."

Carlos Rogers, San Francisco (shown the door in Washington to free up money for megabucks corner DeAngelo Hall, whom Rogers has outplayed);

Carlos Rogers was also highly drafted in the first round. Of course, Gregg won't acknowledge this since it goes against his contention that highly drafted players are lazy and think everything should be handed to them. Another small detail is that Hall was already on the Redskins team when Rogers was on the team. They played together for three seasons, including two years when Hall had a huge contract. So Rogers was not "let go" in order to free up money for Hall. Hall already had the money and Rogers wasn't re-signed for salary cap reasons that may or may have something to do with Hall's contract. Which means he shouldn't be on the list. Gregg hopes no one does research like I am doing which shows he is somewhat full of shit.

Sean Payton wants to be the coach of a quarterback who holds a major record. If it's the second half next Sunday, and Payton knows San Francisco is pounding St. Louis (meaning New Orleans cannot improve its seeding) while New England is in a close game with feast-or-famine Buffalo (meaning Brady stays in), the New Orleans coach may be sorely tempted to keep Brees on the field and throwing to make sure he finishes the season ahead of Brady.

Which is exactly what happened. I didn't have as much of a problem with the Saints doing this against Carolina. I did have a bit of a problem with the Saints throwing late in the fourth quarter against the Falcons in order for Brees to break the record. I just thought it wasn't sportsman-like simply because Brees could have broken the record at home the very next week. It doesn't really matter I guess, but if I were the Falcons I probably would have been a bit irritated with the Saints.

Why is New Orleans so effective on offense? It's not funky tactics.

A great offensive line and they have Drew Brees as their quarterback. It's nearly that simple.

Rookie Julio Jones is playing well, but the king's ransom of draft choices Atlanta gave for him has already resulted in decline of the Falcons' power game.

Here we go again. The inability of the Falcons' offensive line to block well for Michael Turner is pretty much Julio Jones' fault. Jones has ruined everything for the Falcons.

In the first half, when the game was close, Atlanta coaches radioed in only nine rushing plays.

Does Gregg think Julio Jones is the offensive coordinator for the Falcons? I don't know if having more options at wide receiver, which lacking these options has hurt the Falcons in the past, is why the Falcons don't run the ball well. Perhaps more blame should go to the Falcons offensive line. Of course, Gregg won't do this because the Falcons offensive line has one of Gregg's unwanted All-Stars on it (Tyson Clabo) and doesn't have many underachieving high draft picks. So Gregg lays the blame with a glory boy wide receiver who has hurt the Falcons running game apparently by merely being on the active roster.

Next Week: Should Tuesday Morning Quarterback have a disclaimer?

Yes. The disclaimer should say, "Tuesday Morning Quarterback's statements are merely hypothetical and contain very little research or factual information. Statements made by TMQ may not in fact be true and we encourage readers to do their own investigation into the claims and statements by TMQ. This column is purely for entertainment purposes and ESPN only gives a crap about pageviews and doesn't endorse, proofread or edit any of what is written therein. If you repeat as fact anything TMQ may state or claim then you perhaps deserve the ignorance you have acquired by not doing any research."

Sunday, May 1, 2011

6 comments Richie Whitt Drops All Pretense, Tries To Be As Much of a Dick As Possible

Two weeks ago we had John Steigerwald, whether he wants to admit it or not, blaming a beating victim for his own beating because he wore a Giants jersey. This week, Richie Whitt takes on Colby Lewis and chides him for missing a start. Was he in jail? Hungover? Perhaps he didn't make it to the park on time and was pulled from the start as a punitive measure? No, it's worse than that. He went to go see his wife, try to hold back your anger Rangers fans at his lack of dedication to the team, who was giving birth to their second child. This happened during the 162 game regular season nonetheless! He didn't see the birth of his and his wife's first child, oh no, this is the second child they have had. So it's not like he HAD to be there or anything in the eyes of Richie Whitt. I'll let Whitt explain this outrageous event himself.

So Alexi Ogando is human.

A very ugly human, but a human nonetheless. I guess we don't have to worry about Ogando getting too many women pregnant and having to miss a start for the birth of his child because he's ugly. Ugly people shouldn't have kids.

The Rangers' bullpen is shaky. Julio Borbon's center-to-home throws look like Mat McBriar's punts. And Nos. 1-2 hitters are cooler than a New York night.

Admit it, right now Texas' 10-5 feels more like 5-10.

Oh yeah, it's time to panic...or at least take your frustration out on a starting pitcher who doesn't pitch out of the bullpen, can't help Borbon through the ball better and can't hit better than the Rangers offense does. These three things that have nothing to do with Colby Lewis, are all the fault of Colby Lewis.

After Ogando gave up three homers last night, Arthur Rhodes surrendered the game-losing 8th-inning hit to Eric Chavez

Both pitchers clearly were unfocused and angry Colby Lewis wasn't in the dugout eating sunflower seeds and watching them pitch.

Don't look now, but since Josh Hamilton's dumb dash for home Tuesday in Detroit, the Rangers are 1-4 and tied with the Angels atop the AL West. They start a three-game series with the Angels tonight in Arlington.

Most. Important. Series. Ever. If the Rangers had lost all of these games, they would have only had 144 games to make up the three game deficit in the standings.

In Game 2, Colby Lewis is scheduled to start after missing his last regular turn in the rotation because -- I'm not making this up --

He's not making this outrageous event up. What he is about to say REALLY HAPPENED.

his wife, Jenny, was giving birth in California.

A woman is birthing a child? Say it isn't so? Has this ever happened before in the history of the world? What are the odds this happens during a 6 month span during the season when Colby Lewis has to pitch for the Rangers? The odds are probably, what, two-million-to-one?

Besides, who the fuck marries someone named Jenny? Who does Colby Lewis think he is? Forrest Gump? You are a bum Colby Lewis!

To the couple's second child.

Lewis saw his first child born, does he really need to see his second child born? Someone DVR that shit and let Lewis do his job so he can go out and pitch for the Rangers. With Lewis pitching the Rangers offense will immediately pick back up, Josh Hamilton's arm will miraculously heal and the Rangers will never lose another game.

Don't have kids of my own but I raised a step-son for eight years.

I hate to get personal, I really do, because that's out of bounds when it comes to criticizing someone's writing...but Richie Whitt brought his own family up, so here we go...

Raising a step-son is a difficult thing to do for a variety of reasons. It's admirable to raise a step-son and become an important person in that child's life. As far as being a parent to his step-son, I am sure Richie Whitt did a great job. When it comes to criticizing Colby Lewis for going to see his child be born, it is ridiculous to try and claim you understand what kind of decision he had to make because you raised a step-son for eight years. This step-son isn't your son, you may love him like he is your own son, but he isn't so saying you know what it is like for Colby Lewis to see his child born because you have a step-son is just not the same thing.

It is not ridiculous because Whitt doesn't know about loving a child as his own or ridiculous because it makes you more of a parent to raise a child that is actually your own flesh and blood. It is ridiculous because Richie Whitt dares to criticize Colby Lewis for wanting to experience his child's birth and then tries to relate his own experience as a step-parent as proof he has a valid point. It doesn't prove anything. It only goes to prove Richie Whitt doesn't understand the concept of being there to see your child born. If he did, he wouldn't criticize Colby Lewis.

I know all about sacrifice and love and how great children are.

But you clearly don't. If you don't understand the sacrifice (can we even call it that?) of being there when your wife is in labor with your child, then you don't understand about the sacrifice and love required. Again, being a step-parent is wonderful and admirable, but to criticize a person on wanting to be there for his child's birth, while claiming you know his position because you raised a step-child, shows you don't get it.

But a pitcher missing one of maybe 30 starts?

Right. It was one of 30 starts. Lewis only missed one start for the birth of his child.

And it's all kosher because of Major League Baseball's new paternity leave rule?

Which is a rule that may be annoying to some who would like for their favorite pitchers to never miss a start, but is a rule that makes sense as long as you have human feelings and emotions. Rangers fans may be irritated about this, but outside the fan-frenzy idea of a player missing a start this paternity leave rule makes sense.

Follow me this way to some confusion.

No need to follow you. I am already there waiting on you. I'm confused as to how you can be critical of a person who wants to see his child born.

Imagine if Jason Witten missed a game to attend the birth of a child.

If Jason Witten missed a game to attend the birth of his child, I am sure crazy madness would ensue. The world would never be the same. If Jason Witten missed a game to attend the birth of his child, I am sure Dallas would explode with anger.

Not to mention, Witten would miss one of sixteen games (eighteen games soon?), while Colby Lewis will miss one of his thirty starts. Witten missing one game of sixteen has a greater effect on the Cowboys overall record than Lewis missing one game out of 162 games.

It's just, I dunno, weird. Wrong even.

Absolutely it is not wrong. What's wrong is criticizing a player for taking the time to see his child come into the world. It is the regular season.

Departures? Totally get it because at a funeral you're saying goodbye to someone for the last time.

But an arrival is merely saying hello to someone you'll see the rest of your life.

Using this logic, there would be no need to go to a funeral because you have seen that person your entire life. The dead person doesn't know you are there, so what does it matter if you are there or not. It's not like there will be pictures of the funeral that show you weren't there.

This is as opposed to child birth when Lewis' child becomes 10 years old and wants to see pictures of his birth and he notices his father wasn't in any of the pictures. It would be fine for Colby Lewis to just tell his son he wasn't there "because I knew I would see you the entire rest of my life. I had a game to pitch that day." It also sounds like something that may not make sense to a ten year old.

Besides, nothing has ever gone wrong during childbirth, so there is a 100% guarantee you'll see both your wife and your child for the rest of your life. No woman has ever had complications from child birth and the mother or child died as a result. Not to mention, I am sure Lewis' wife has no qualms with giving birth with her husband not there. It's probably not a stressful time for her at all.

Dave Bush filled in for Lewis last week in Detroit and threw three scoreless innings of a game that Mark Lowe and the bullpen eventually coughed up. But that's not the point.

"The Rangers bullpen blew the game for the Rangers, so even if Lewis had pitched the Rangers would have lost. Don't let the reality of this prevent you from believing I have a point though. I would have a point if the Rangers bullpen didn't blow the lead."

Baseball players are paid millions to play baseball.

At what point does a person make enough money to miss the birth of a child? I wonder if Richie Whitt has a chart that helps explain this to me.

If that means "scheduling" births so they occur in the off-season, then so be it.

Perhaps this wasn't a "scheduled" birth. Maybe it was an accident. Perhaps rather than have an abortion so the child isn't born during baseball season, Lewis' wife decided she was going to go ahead and have the child, even though it coincided very inconveniently with the baseball season.

Perhaps Lewis was hoping the 24-72 hours he was given for paternity leave wouldn't fall on a day he had to pitch. That's possible as well. It's not like Lewis starts every game for the Rangers. He figured he could see his child born and not miss a start.

Perhaps the Lewis family had been trying to have a second child for a few years now and finally his wife got pregnant. There are so many possible scenarios. They all end with the idea it wasn't "wrong" for Colby Lewis to value seeing his child being born over missing one of his 30 starts in a season.

Of the 365 days in a year, starting pitchers "work" maybe 40 of them, counting spring training and playoffs.

Right, and Colby Lewis missed a game the bullpen ended up blowing anyway. Maybe Mark Lowe doesn't blow the game if the starting pitcher for the Rangers goes more than 3 innings, that's possible, but the fact remains the Rangers bullpen blew the game.

If it was a first child, maybe. But a second child causing a player to miss a game?

Is this a parody? It has to be. There's no way Richie Whitt really has a "been there, done that" attitude about a family having a second child. Do we even have to take pictures for a third child? How about a family that has a fourth child? Is it even worth feeding this child? Does this child need a crib? The cat's bed would work perfectly fine as a bed for a newborn.

Ludicrous.

No, criticizing Colby Lewis for missing a start to see his child being born is ludicrous. This is shameful.

I know the fan in me says a pitcher for my favorite team shouldn't miss a start, but the human in me says it is fine to see your child being born. Rob Neyer put a poll up and completely changed the situation around in order to give us a new "perspective" on this issue. Yeah, if it was the World Series or the Super Bowl it may be a different story. It wasn't, so it doesn't matter. It was a regular season start Colby Lewis missed and Richie Whitt incorrectly criticized him for missing the game.

Monday, January 3, 2011

14 comments Someone Teach Gregg Easterbrook About Economics In The NFL Please

Gregg Easterbrook has done his annual "unwanted players" column for TMQ. This is by far my least favorite TMQ of the year because Gregg doesn't understand the ramifications of the salary cap in the NFL. He doesn't get that some teams want to keep a player but can not because the player makes too much money and he won't take a pay cut. He doesn't get how a player may get cut for salary cap reasons because the team wants to use a less expensive player in his place or the team realizes the player has talent but there are other players on the team they want to spend their money on. He fails to see all of this. Obviously this isn't the case for all of these players, but for a quite a few it is.

Yes, there are players who are having good years who weren't wanted by prior teams but Gregg includes Drew Brees on this list for God's sake. He was a fucking free agent when the Chargers didn't re-sign him because they had Philip Rivers. The same Philip Rivers who is one of the best quarterbacks in the NFL at this very moment. I hate this column.

My All-Unwanted roster celebrates those who got where they are based on hard work and determination. In most of life, hard work and determination are more important than social status or God-given talent.

I hate this column.

Is this opposed to the actual All-Pro players who didn't work hard and weren't determined. How did Peyton Manning, Tom Brady, and all of the other players who were voted into the Pro Bowl get there if they didn't use hard work or determination? Pure luck?

Consider: This season's NFL leading rusher, Arian Foster, was undrafted, and he has outperformed dozens of high-choice, big-bonus glory boys.

This year. He hasn't outperformed these guys for even two years, but for one year. I feel like I need to point that out. Foster had a great year, but he outperformed the "glory boys" for exactly one year.

Consider: The New England Patriots, with the league's best record and highest-scoring offense, start seven undrafted players. When undrafted guard Stephen Neal went down injured, undrafted guard Ryan Wendell stepped in to replace him. Ten of the 22 Patriots' starters were undrafted or let go by other teams, or both.

In this day of free agency in the NFL many, many players are going to be let go by a team. It is not often a quality player spends his entire career with one team. So the odds of a good player being on the same team for his entire career aren't always high, so being let go doesn't mean that much nowadays.

As far as Gregg's claim here, reader Tom emailed me that Gregg is wrong about this. Neal went down and was replaced by undrafted free agent Dan Connolly, then Connolly got injured and was replaced by Wendell. Since Gregg is fascinated with undrafted players I would think he would know this.

And now, the Tuesday Morning Quarterback All-Unwanted Players of the Year.

Winners: Brent Grimes, cornerback, Atlanta, and Danny Woodhead, tailback, New England.

Was there ever any doubt that Woodhead would win this award from Gregg? What about Grimes though? Let's see Gregg's reasoning...as if it really matters I guess.

This season, he leads Atlanta in interceptions and is the team's No. 2 tackler; it's rare for a cornerback to be a top tackler.

A lesser football mind, not someone as knowledgeable as Gregg, would mention that the reason Grimes has so many interceptions is because teams are throwing the ball at him a lot. Possibly because he is seen as not as good of a cornerback as Dunta Robinson by other teams. So Gregg's criteria for making Grimes the unwanted player of the year is that he gets a lot of interceptions, possibly because teams aren't afraid to test him. Interceptions aren't always a sign of a great cornerback. Now in the case of Grimes, he is turning into a really good cornerback, so Gregg is coming to the correct conclusion, just through somewhat shaky reasoning.

Also, the fact Grimes is the second best tackler for Atlanta possibly means he has had to tackle a lot of players that have had the ball thrown in his direction. This is another sign that perhaps having a lot of a certain statistic isn't always a good thing. Grimes is a good player and a fine cornerback, but in general, simply because he has a lot of interceptions and tackles means teams throw the ball his direction or run his direction a lot. Gregg doesn't think about this in his "analysis."

Atlanta, at 12-3, holds the inside track for the top NFC seed in no small part because of the performance of an undrafted small-school cornerback whose name many football enthusiasts don't even know.

Not true at all. Football enthusiasts know Grimes' name.

Woodhead was the all-time, all-division NCAA rushing leader, but he was not drafted. He spent two seasons with the Jets, mostly on the practice squad, then was waived. This season, he has gained 907 yards rushing and receiving for the Patriots -- his rushing average is 5.6 yards per carry -- and, though "too small," has become one of the NFL's best blitz-blocking backs.

Whoa, whoa. I thought we learned a few weeks ago that the Patriots fooled a team by having Woodhead block? How about we take a look at a direct Gregg Easterbrook contradiction...from four weeks ago when he was criticizing the Jets:

On a very amusing play, Woodhead at 5-foot-8, 189 pounds and Welker, at 5-9, 185 pounds, lined up as blitz-blocking backs! The Jets believed this, ignoring Woodhead as he snuck through the offensive line for a 35-yard reception.

How hilarious the Jets believed Woodhead would line up as a blitz-blocking back! That would never happen according to Gregg Easterbrook, those Jets are such fools!

This would make sense for Gregg to believe this except in his "unwanted player" column, Gregg Easterbrook says Woodhead is one of the best blitz-blocking backs in the NFL, so possibly it makes sense why the Jets believed he would block on a blitz a few weeks ago. I need no further proof than this that Gregg Easterbrook just makes up shit as he goes along. One week he goes out of his way to talk about the Jets should never have believed he would block on a blitz and a few weeks later he talks about how good at blitz pick-up Woodhead is.

Although the loss dropped the Seahawks to 6-9, the team knew, before kickoff, that it would play for the division title the next week regardless of the outcome. Seattle coach Pete Carroll seemed to call lots of mega-blitzes against Tampa hoping to fall behind quickly so he'd have a respectable reason to pull starters and let them rest.

I am sure that is exactly what Seattle did. They laid down and blitzed (which ALWAYS is a bad idea) so they could fall behind early and pull their starters. All of this in an effort to help them win the division next week...because resting starters immediately leads to wins the very next week (even though they did win).

Most important, a seeded format would ensure better playoff matchups. Isn't this what every NFL viewer and spectator wants? And yes, a seeded format could result in an all-NFC or all-AFC Super Bowl. If the pairing is the two best teams, their conferences shouldn't matter. Do you know, or care, which conference currently leads the NFC-AFC Super Bowl results rivalry? Neither do I.

I have to admit a seeded playoff is an interesting idea. I don't know if I like the idea of an All-AFC or All-NFC Super Bowl though. This just seems like an excuse to see the Colts-Patriots play in the Super Bowl. It is an interesting idea, but I think it would be a better idea to seed the teams in each conference and stick to an NFC-AFC Super Bowl.

Stats of the Week No. 2: The San Diego Chargers, ranked first on defense and second on offense, were eliminated from the playoffs.

That's amazing! Those are the only two elements of a football game too! Offense and defense. Oh wait, that's right there are special teams too, but they don't count for anything do they? I am sure they can't make a difference in a game.

Sour Coach's Play of the Week No. 1: With Cincinnati leading San Diego 20-13 -- the Bolts needing a victory to stave off elimination despite fabulous stats, Carson Palmer having his best game of the season with the T.Ocho sideshow out of the lineup -- the Bengals faced third-and-7 on their 41 with six minutes remaining. Palmer threw a 59-yard touchdown pass to backup receiver Jerome Simpson, and TMQ wrote the words "season over" for San Diego in his notebook.

How bold! Six minutes left in a game a team is down 14 points. No shit the game is over at this point.

San Diego corner Antoine Cason was out of position at the snap and burned badly. Sportstalk has analyzed this play all wrong, placing the blame on Cason. Many touts have accused him of a busted coverage; on "Mike & Mike in the Morning," former NFL receiver Cris Carter said Cason must have been "tired" or lost focus. The Chargers' coaching staff was to blame!

Oh, do tell why.

As Cincinnati approached the line of scrimmage, Bolts defensive coordinator Ron Rivera hadn't called the defense.

Gregg knows this for sure................how?

Rivera did not radio in the defensive call to San Diego green-dot linebacker Kevin Burnett until the Bengals were starting their cadence. At the snap, Cason was looking back at Burnett, trying to get the defensive call. Blame this touchdown on the coaches!

I can not believe this is true. Maybe it is, but there had to be something else going on. Maybe Cason had the play and was just asking Burnett what he was having for dinner that night? It seems about as likely as a play call not getting to the defense when the offense is milking the clock.

From my own modest experience as a middle-school head coach, I can relate that you get 10 seconds, max, to decide on your call because you must allow time for the call to go in and then be relayed to the players.

I want to play Gregg's middle school team. Talk about an easy win.

Middle linebackers typically are coached: If you don't get the call or are confused, then the call is Cover 2, every team's staple defense. The San Diego defense did not seem to have a default call to compensate for the coach's error.

This is EVERY team's staple defense. EVERY team. There are no exceptions.

It also bears mentioning that Cason was trying to get the call and if he is the only one on the defense without the call, which I find hard to believe, going to Cover 2 may leave the wide receiver wide open with no safety help once the receiver passes Cason. So Cason played the defense he thought Rivera had intended to call. You know, there's that too.

This issue is not the cleanliness of streets or the environmental benefits of recycling -- it's control of money. The New York City Sanitation Department pays a company called Sims Municipal Recycling about $65 million annually to pick up and recycle metal, glass and aluminum. Notice what's happening here? Recycling is supposed to make economic sense. If it did, the recycling company would be paying the city. Instead, the city is paying the company.

So a company would go into business and pay the city to pick up the recycling. They would pay to do work...but why would they do this? Recycling does make economic sense but that doesn't mean a company or the city should pay someone to recycle.

But let's not forget the Crabtree Curse, which TMQ sees as all too real. In 2008, Singletary fought to make his players buy into the notion that no one is bigger than the team. It worked, and San Francisco began to win. Then the 49ers used a high first-round draft choice on me-first Crabtree, watched him stage a prolonged holdout, then rewarded him with a $15 million bonus for going me-first. So much for the team commitment business.

The Crabtree Curse strikes again! I still can't believe the 49ers dared to draft a wide receiver at #10 in the draft and then pay him the amount of money a player drafted at that slot would typically earn even after he held out. It's egregious and most likely the reason the entire season went to hell. The 49ers struggles had nothing to do with the bad coaching on the part of Mike Singletary that Gregg talked about every week.

Sunday, the Niners had lazy play after lazy play. In the first quarter, Smith was sacked in his end zone for a safety, putting Les Mouflons ahead 9-0, though San Francisco had six linemen to block four rushers.

Where was Michael Crabtree on this play? Probably on the bench counting his millions instead of playing the offensive line position he wasn't drafted to play.

Trailing 15-14 at the start of the fourth quarter, San Francisco coaches called a pass on third-and-1. Although the Niners had six to block four, tailback Brian Westbrook was the sole San Francisco player to attempt to block much larger defensive end James Hall: sack, punt.

If Michael Crabtree would call better plays as the offensive coordinator this would never happen.

The 2010 All-Unwanted All-Pros: Here are the qualifications for the All-Unwanted All-Pros: A player must have been undrafted, or been waived, or been let go in free agency when his original club made no bona fide attempt to retain him.

Here is another qualification. Gregg will completely ignore this rule at his own discretion.

Free agents whom their original teams wanted to retain, but could not for salary-cap reasons, are not eligible.

Except we need to remember that Gregg doesn't understand the NFL salary cap at all. He thinks a quality player would never get let go for salary cap reasons.

Wide receivers: Brandon Lloyd*, Denver (waived by Washington and Chicago, started only seven games from 2007 to 2009, leads NFL in receiving yards);

During the season of 2006, no receiver in NFL history started more games (12) while producing less (365 yards). This was a guy the Redskins gave up 2 draft picks to get. Can you blame them for waiving him?

Quarterback: Michael Vick, Philadelphia (waived by Atlanta; when released from prison, most NFL teams would not even talk to him).

Vick was waived by Atlanta based on the little problem that he was going to jail, but other than that they really fucked up didn't they? That Matt Ryan guy stinks. Mike Vick would have secured the Falcons homefield advantage through these upcoming playoffs and the next two playoffs. He's that good.

For Gregg to talk about Vick not being wanted by NFL teams on a purely football standpoint is just ridiculous. There was so much more that went into it than just his football skill. The team that signed him had to deal with all the baggage he had, and it worked out for the Eagles. It took a season, but it worked out.

Jim Leonhard*, Jersey/B (undrafted after being a college walk-on, let go by Buffalo and Baltimore, 2009 TMQ Unwanted Player of the Year);

He wasn't "let go" by the Ravens. He chose to follow Rex Ryan to the Jets team. He signed on March 3, which is pretty early in the free agency period, so the Ravens didn't get a huge chance to re-sign him because he was gone already.

Flozell Adams, Pittsburgh (waived by the Cowboys; since that moment, the Cowboys have been losing and the Steelers winning);

Because the Steelers didn't win six Super Bowls, including two of them over the last decade without Flozell Adams in the lineup. Everyone pretty much who has watched Adams agrees he has lost a step or two. Him being waived by the Cowboys because he would have been owed $7.5 million for the next season and isn't worth that much money definitely qualifies as a salary cap move.

Brian Waters, Kansas City (undrafted, decent chance of making Hall of Fame).

Waters has played for the Chiefs for his entire career. I don't know how he can even somewhat qualify as an unwanted player. Yes, he was undrafted, so I guess he fits Gregg's criteria.

Mike Williams*, Seattle (former higher first-round pick was waived by Detroit, Oakland and Tennessee, was out of football in 2008 and 2009).

I think it is ridiculous to criticize any team that gave up on Mike Williams. He was one of the biggest busts in the NFL Draft in recent memory. He came out of college as a wide receiver and he had such terrible conditioning habits that one of the teams that waived him tried to see if he would stick as a tight end while he was on their roster. There is a very good reason that Mike Williams was unwanted and that's because he was lazy and out of shape.

Tight end: Ben Watson & Evan Moore*, Cleveland (Moore was undrafted and waived twice, has a master's in sociology from Stanford; Watson was let go by New England -- combined, they form one of the NFL's top pairs of tight ends).

The Patriots let Watson go because they didn't want to re-sign him. That's true, but he really wasn't unwanted by the Patriots because they didn't want to pay his price in free agency. The Patriots just drafted two other tight ends who have equaled the production of Moore and Watson. So the Patriots have essentially gotten an equally great pair of tight ends that are younger and cheaper than the Browns' tight ends. Also, the fact Moore has a master's in Sociology is incredibly irrelevant.

Quarterback: Drew Brees, New Orleans (let go by San Diego, rejected by Miami when he offered to sign there because "too short," has won the Super Bowl and is on track for numerous passing records).

Let's do this one by one...I am going to have a heart attack if I hear this bullshit one more time about the Chargers not wanting Drew Brees. Here's a whole rundown of the story.

Perhaps Gregg could read the very site he works for, ESPN.com, and see the Chargers offered him a contract. BREES WANTED MORE GUARANTEED MONEY!

Brees was not rejected by Miami. I hate revisionist history. Miami offered him a contract but it didn't contain enough guaranteed money like the Saints contract did, so Brees took MORE FUCKING MONEY. Yeah, he went to the team that offered him the most money. You don't hear Gregg mentioning that much do you?

Also, the Dolphins were scared off by the fact Brees underwent major shoulder surgery just a few months prior. The Dolphins didn't reject him because he was too short, Gregg just absolutely makes that up, but because they didn't want to pay a shit-ton of money for a quarterback who had a shoulder that could never heal properly.

I get so tired of telling the same Brees story over and over. It's an absolute nightmare that Gregg won't do actual research and just makes assumptions. It's even worse that ESPN just lets him do it when he is clearly wrong, which he would know if he did some research.

Charles Woodson, Green Bay (future Hall of Famer cast off by Oakland as "washed up" five years ago);

No one on the Raiders called Woodson washed up. He wanted to be paid like the best cornerback in the NFL and the Raiders didn't want to pay him like he was. It's as simple as that. He wasn't unwanted, he just didn't want to be franchised anymore and the Raiders didn't want to give him a long-term deal because they are the Raiders.

Unwanted players to keep an eye on

Jason Babin*, defensive end, Tennessee (waived by Texans, Seahawks, Chiefs and Eagles).

Gregg goes out of his way constantly to talk about how terrible highly drafted, highly paid 1st round draft choices are in the NFL. He calls them lazy and thinks they don't work hard enough. Yet for some reason when a first round underachiever has one great year Gregg is very quick to call that player "unwanted." Babin was a first round underachiever his entire time in the NFL. He fits Gregg's constant description of a first round pick that doesn't work hard enough (at least in Gregg's perception), yet Gregg is very quick to call him "unwanted" like the four teams who had him before made a mistake. Gregg's TMQ involves no analysis, but merely relies on judgments based on the result, even if it contradicts one of Gregg's edicts.

Really, I could argue with quite a few of Gregg's "unwanted" players but this would end up being a three part column and no one wants to read something that long. If I miss one that is egregious, feel free to tell me in the comments.

Bernard Pollard, safety, Houston (cut by Kansas City, plays well though Texans' secondary is awful).

Sure, even though the Texans secondary is absolutely terrible I am sure Bernard Pollard is a great player. Gregg is probably basing his analysis on how many tackles Pollard has.

Pat Williams*, defensive tackle, Minnesota (undrafted, let go by Buffalo as "washed up" six years ago, three Pro Bowl appearances since).

Isn't someone supposed to use quotes when they are actually quoting what someone said or were referring to? No one affiliated with the Bills ever called Williams "washed up," yet Gregg acts as if they did. If Gregg would do some research he could see that the Bills barely got a chance to try and re-sign Pat Williams because the Vikings had made him a priority in free agency and signed him very quickly in the free agency period. He had zero Pro Bowl appearances with Buffalo, so it is not like the Bills let a Pro Bowl player go because they supposedly thought he was "washed up."

George Wilson*, safety, Buffalo (undrafted, waived by Detroit, played the boyfriend of Mary J. Blige in a music video).

Next year when George Wilson has a bad year Gregg Easterbrook will accuse Wilson of not being focused on football and being too focused on an entertainment career.

Michael Kessler of Chicago reports that the issue of GQ he received on Dec. 15 features a spring style guide.

This makes sense. Spring clothes are out in stores before spring and for a person to wear the clothes in the style guide they should go purchase the clothes before spring actually begins. The point of the guide is to start spring already in style.

Why am I even talking about this?

The Patriots ran a delayed draw to Danny Woodhead, with the center and right guard double-teaming Bills nose tackle Kyle Williams while tight end Rob Gronkowski trap-blocked confused rookie defensive lineman Terrell Troup. Usually, only guards trap-block; at New England, tight ends do.

How does Easterbrook even get away with writing this stuff? Usually only guards trap block? What type of proof does he have this is even partially close to true...other than his constant insistence on misleading his audience?

On the Packers' 80-yard touchdown pass to Jordy Nelson, Jersey/A had three safeties on the field -- the G-Men have been playing a TCU-style 4-2-5 much of the season --

Is this really true Giants fans? I know the Giants have had some injuries at linebacker but I can't help but wonder if this statement is true.

Michael Vick's comeback the previous week was enabled largely by too much Jersey/A blitzing. So, did Giants coaches learn their lesson? With Green Bay leading 24-17 in the second half, the Giants blitzed six; the result was a 36-yard completion to Greg Jennings to set up a touchdown.

Yes, because the clear solution in this situation is to never blitz again. That certainly won't pose any defensive problems in the future.

Hidden plays are ones that never make highlight reels but that stop or sustain drives. With Indianapolis needing a win to keep alive its playoff hopes, the Colts, at Oakland, led 24-16 at the start of the fourth quarter. The Raiders faced third-and-9 on the Lucky Charms' 19. Indianapolis rushed five, and middle linebacker Gary Brackett got a sack, forcing the home team to settle for the field goal. The contest ended with Indianapolis winning 31-26; had Oakland recorded a touchdown on this possession, the outcome might have been very different.

I really don't enjoy these hidden plays. A sack on third down is always a big play for a defense. Simply because a 30 second highlight doesn't include this sack doesn't mean it wasn't important or hidden in any fashion. If highlight reels are the standard for determining whether a play was important or not, then we are all screwed.

Next Week: The coveted "longest award in sports" -- the Tuesday Morning Quarterback Non-Quarterback Non-Running Back NFL MVP.

I am on the edge of my seat. Any guesses on who it will be readers? We have 24 hours to get it right. I say it will be Troy Polamalu or Gregg will try to cheat and give the award to Danny Woodhead by saying he has played some wide receiver. Ok, Wes Welker is my final answer.