6 comments MMQB Review: Matthew Stafford is So Different Now, Except for He Probably Isn't

Peter King told us last week the Colts had a little Luck (DO YOU STILL GET IT?) in beating the Broncos during Week 7. Peter also was concerned the Rams would not get enough attention because the Cardinals had a home game in the World Series, as well as continued his trend towards overreacting to what happened the weekend before by handing the AFC West to the Kansas City Chiefs and giving the Broncos an AFC Wild Card spot. Peter can hear us scoffing at him now, but less than 50% of the season had been played at that point, so the playoff seeding is nearly set. This week Peter talks about Matthew Stafford "coming of age" (which means, "Calvin Johnson had a great receiving day"...sort of), goes through the comments section of MMQB for responses to the MMQB (not the MMQB, but THE MMQB) articles about concussions, and relays a story from Robert Klemko about really weird Japanese people. Peter also continues his trend of seeing what happened over the past weekend and then reacting as if this event from the past weekend is a definite long-term trend.

Two months down, two to go. Time flies when you’re having fun. The Lions had some fun Sunday, and the resurgent Staffords will lead the column …

So I guess since the Lions won a game this past weekend over Dallas this means the Bears and Packers going to be fighting for a Wild Card spot after the Lions win the NFC North division.

but some headlines first:

Absolutely not. Let's talk about how Stafford is a great quarterback now based on the fact he made a really heads-up play at the end of the game on Sunday, had as many turnovers as touchdowns and threw for 488 yards with 329 of those yards going to one receiver.

Mike Pouncey might want to get lawyered up. As Pete Thamel and Greg A. Bedard reported Sunday night, the Massachusetts state police served the Miami Dolphins center with a Grand Jury subpoena after his game in Foxboro Sunday. “What’s this about?’’ Pouncey said when a gray-suited officer handed him the papers. It created a strange scene outside the Dolphins’ locker room at Gillette Stadium, with stunned team officials totally blindsided. Pouncey, too, evidently had no idea what was coming.

I think it would be fair to say the officer "pounced" on him, no?

Just like Clark Griswold’s Jelly of the Month Club present, the Kansas City quarterback brought more joy to two fan bases Sunday. In lifting the Chiefs to a 23-17 victory over Cleveland at home, Smith continued KC’s perfect (8-0) season.

Alex Smith continued the Chiefs perfect season by holding the Browns to 340 total yards and accumulating a massive 331 yards for the Chiefs offense. He's a winning winner who only wins. He's an efficient quarterback, as seen by his completion percentage of 59.1% which is good for 24th in the NFL, his yards per attempt of 6.28 which is good for 29th in the NFL, his quarterback rating of 82.1 which is good for 18th in the NFL, and his yards per game passing of 224 which is good for 23rd in the NFL. Smith has done all of this against such difficult teams like the Jags, Texans, Eagles, Giants, Titans, Raiders and Browns. Smith has been his usual average self against some really below-average competition, so kudos to him.

If you can't see through all that sarcasm, I think the Chiefs are a paper tiger. I had them at 9 wins before the season began and I think I was wrong about that number, but playing Denver and San Diego twice, along with a game against the Colts is going to tell me how good the Chiefs really are. Hey, I could be wrong and the Chiefs are one of the two best teams in the AFC, but I think the second half of the season isn't going to be as kind to Alex Smith and the Chiefs.

The original trade was Smith for a second-round pick in 2013 and a third-rounder in 2014 … but the third- in ’14 would become a second- if the Chiefs won eight games or more this season. That happened by mid-afternoon Sunday, as the Niners were trudging off the field at Wembley Stadium in London after whipping Jacksonville 42-10. As if San Francisco draft guru Trent Baalke needed more ammo, he now could be looking at six picks in the first three rounds next May:

Take that, Gregg Easterbrook, Mr. "The 49ers should have kept Alex Smith." As Alex Smith wins game for the Chiefs he helps the 49ers get a higher draft pick.

This just in: Calvin Johnson’s good. He had a nice month in three hours Sunday at Ford Field in Detroit’s 31-30 shocker of Dallas: 14 catches, 329 yards (seven short of the all-time single-game record), one touchdown.

I would love to know what kind of quarterback Matthew Stafford would be if he didn't have Calvin Johnson out there catching the ball for him. I know it's not fair to wonder that since Stafford does have Johnson and if you took any quarterback's best receiver away he wouldn't play as well, but so much of Stafford's success lies in having Johnson out there. Stafford's worst games of the season were when Johnson wasn't healthy. I probably have no point.

Remember the good ol’ days? Way back in the first half of the first game of the season, when the Chip Kelly offense was all the rage?

No Peter, but I remember all summer when you were up Chip Kelly's ass about how he ran his practices and talked about how the Eagles are doing things SO MUCH differently than every other NFL coach does things. I remember when you said the Chip Kelly hiring was the biggest hiring from the college ranks since Jimmy Johnson. I also remember when I stupidly bought into the crap you and your fellow sportswriters were peddling and predicted the Eagles would win the NFC East.

There’s some thought that because there is no “home” team in England, and selling a bad Jacksonville team (the Jags will play a game there in 2014, ’15 and ’16 at least) will be problematic right now, a good option is every team alternating. Of course, that won’t be a good option the minute you tell a Packers, Steelers, Broncos or Seahawks fan he  or she has to lose a home game for the sake of expansionism.

Actually that won't be a good option for the fans of any NFL team who loses a home game for the sake of expansionism. I'll be damned if I want my favorite team to have seven home games because Roger Goodell insists on expanding to London.

But as one league operative told me recently: “If you guys [NBC, where I also work] can get 850,000 viewers for a Manchester United game on NBC Sports Network, why can’t we build a block of fans like that for football over there?”

Fine, build a block of fans in England, but don't take away home games to build that block. That's like if Manchester United lost a home soccer match and played here in the United States every year. Fuck that. The NFL can do whatever it wants to build a fan base in England, that's great, but NFL fans are already getting ripped off for two shitty preseason games, so they don't deserve to lose another home game for the sake of the NFL trying to expand. Show the games in England to build a fan base, don't take away home games from NFL teams. I know my opinion is probably in the minority.

Greg Jennings in the Revenge Game: One catch, nine yards, left the locker room before the media arrived following Green Bay’s 44-31 win at Minnesota last night. That’s 264 yards fewer than teammate Cordarrelle Patterson put on the board.

Poor Greg Jennings. It's so hard to be a great receiver when your quarterbacks all suck. Perhaps next time before Jennings runs his mouth about Aaron Rodgers he should find out if any of the quarterbacks on his Vikings team are any good or not.

I wrote last year about the possibility of a quarterback, in the not-too-distant future, throwing for 6,000 yards in a season. Aaron Rodgers, I theorized, would have the best shot. I’m not saying Peyton Manning’s going to do it this year, but let’s acknowledge the greatness of the first-half MVP here. In Denver’s 7-1 start,

It's a shame the Broncos are going to be getting a wild card in the AFC after starting out 7-1. At least Peter had the Broncos getting a wild card and the Chiefs winning the AFC West last week, perhaps Peter seen something shiny this week and has changed his opinion on this in the seven whole days since he last wrote MMQB. I'm sure as soon as the Chiefs lose, Peter will put the Broncos right back on top of the AFC West. 

But let’s say he adds one medium-range skinny post per game in the final eight games. Say, an extra gain of 20 per game. If Manning averages 385 yards per game in his final eight, he’ll hit 6,000.

Of course Peter is ignoring the fact Manning could already be throwing for his peak amount of yardage right now. In other words, his current passing yards per game may be Manning's ceiling for yardage in a game, but that doesn't stop Peter from theorizing how Manning could break 6,000 yards...but who’d have ever thought throwing for 6,000 would be remotely possible so soon after 5,000 started getting hit?

(Peter King in early May) "Right now, Chris Davis is averaging a home run every third game. But let's say Chris Davis starts hitting a home run every game. That's almost 100 home runs for the season. Who would have thought a player could hit 100 home runs in a season?"

Matthew Stafford’s coming-of-age moment.

“SPIKE! SPIKE! SPIKE!”

We’ll get to that.

This is the second time Peter has said he would get to this. How about he just gets to it and stops the long preamble?

Certainly, this was not Stafford’s first big comeback. This was his 10th fourth-quarter comeback. But this one just felt different to me. Something about the high-tension accuracy and the big-boy decision he made with the game ticking away.

What felt different to Peter is this comeback happened just this past weekend and Peter has started to overreact to the NFL games that just occurred, so the immediacy of the comeback makes it feel different to Peter. Sure, Stafford came back from more points down on the road against the Cowboys a few years ago, but this comeback just happened! It's just so different!

Now :21, :20 … Stafford motioning to the offense to hustle up the field. “I was looking back, yelling for [left tackle] Riley Reiff to hurry up,’’ Stafford said … :19, :18 … Now motioning madly for Reiff to get in place, while also yelling “SPIKE” and giving the universal “spike’’ signal, the hand gesturing hard to the ground, over and over … Reiff in place, at :16.

“So I’m on the line, and everyone in the stadium thinks I’m spiking it, and that was the plan,’’ Stafford said. “The other 10 guys [on offense] thought I was too. I thought I was—but then I saw a couple of their guys, almost standing up, and I just had this thought: Maybe I could make it by sneaking, or just putting the ball over the line. Maybe that was our best chance.’’

Plus, Stafford didn't have enough room to just throw the ball up in the air to Calvin Johnson as he prefers to do, so he had to try something different.

But no timeouts left. Clock running. If Stafford failed, there was a chance he wouldn’t get another play off.

I believe Peter is being overdramatic here. If Stafford failed then he and his linemen could have gotten up and possibly spiked the football. It's not like they had run anywhere, they just had to get up, get the ball re-placed and then spike it. Maybe not, but "there was a chance" Stafford wouldn't get another play off. There's also a chance the Lions could have gotten another play off. Naturally, Peter chooses the more dramatic of the options.

So why? Why do it? Why not the fade to Johnson, who could win a jump ball against most of the Dallas defenders—shoot, against all of them? If it’s incomplete, another fade, or a rollout pass.

Because Stafford has matured, Peter. He's like completely mature now.

“You just feel it,’’ he said. “Hard to explain. You just go to the line and you feel it sometimes, and I just felt: Our best chance is me taking to the ball and diving it over. I mean, all we were was three inches from the end zone.”

Snap … :14 … Stafford takes the ball, grips it as tight as he can, and with much of the defensive line looking on impassively, he thrusts the ball clearly over the line and brings it back. Touchdown.

This was a great play, but the Lions had just run a play that ended near the goal line with 26 seconds left in the game. The Lions offensive linemen ran 22 yards in that time, got the ball set, and ran a play in 12 seconds. It's completely possible, and probably very likely, if Stafford's attempt to score failed the Lions would get another play off in the approximate 10 seconds left in the game. So Stafford's play was very smart, but also not quite the risk that Peter is so much wanting to make it out to be. Peter loves a little drama though.

I know how sportswriters love their narratives and love to see a group of events turn into a story, so "Matthew Stafford has matured" is the likely narrative to come out of this game. More likely nothing has changed and Stafford had a big game because Calvin Johnson had a fantastic game, while Stafford happened to also make a smart play to win the game for the Lions. I still think the comeback against the Cowboys on the road a couple of years ago was the better Stafford comeback. Of course, immediacy usually wins, so this Cowboys-Lions game had to have been a turning point for Stafford in his career.

In the past week, we at The MMQB have tried to take the head-trauma debate deeper, with 19 stories exploring ideas about a safer game, the realities of playing a violent game, and the complicated issues facing youth and high-school football today.

My takeaways from the series: It surprises me that parents—and we interviewed 23 of them who spoke this way—cede the decision to play or not play high-school football to their sons.

That has changed in the time since I was a (quite marginal) high-school athlete in Enfield, Conn. If my father and mother thought the sport I was playing was excessively dangerous, they’d have interceded and recommended and/or demanded I not play.

PETER'S PARENTS CARED ABOUT HIM MORE THAN PARENTS TODAY CARE ABOUT THEIR CHILDREN!

I understand wanting to empower your children, but I’m not sure empowering 15- and 16-year-olds who make decisions based very often on emotion is a smart call …

Because it appears the alternative is to intercede and run the risk of your child growing up to be a oft-pretentious sportswriter who expects no human being at any point to interfere with his perfect existence on the planet and feels the need to comment when he perceives someone isn't acting in the proper fashion while on a plane, train, or automobile.

Now for some reactions to the writing we did.

From the comments sections...

Getting reactions from people in the comment section from a widely read sports article is perhaps one of the most useless and futile exercises to get constructive feedback that a sportswriter could participate in, but here we go anyway...

From “branlishan:” “There is a non-stop assault on football by SI and its writers. We get it now. Football is dangerous. If football is such a barbaric sport then why do you cover the games and bring attention to the glory of it all? SI should stop with the hypocritical garbage. Either line up behind the ‘ban football’ crowd and stop covering a sport that is so dangerous, or shut up. Because this non-stop assault never ends.’’

I hate it when sportswriters provide a non-stop assault of facts they have discovered when investigating a topic. Stop with the facts and give me more filler!

From “decredico,” to me: “You sat on this story for years and under reported it and you are part of the package that kept this off the radar for many years. You are a disingenuous hypocrite that should be excoriated and excommunicated and banished to writing for the local garden section of a small town newspaper.’’

This is why you ignore the comments section. I write about Peter King every week, but come on, it's not his job nor is he qualified to do research on concussions and then report on it in-depth. Peter could do the reporting, but the story hasn't been researched for years, so there is no way Peter "sat" on the story. People are idiots.

From “hlmencken56:” “We’re just a country full of cowards now. Everyone is a victim, and nobody should ever get hurt, or the risks always must be lowered.”

This isn't constructive nor instructive. Clearly, this idiot has never played football nor dealt with a loved one that has a traumatic brain injury.

Now for emails THE MMQB received on the topic of concussions...

“I have been a fan of you and your MMQB column for seven or eight years now and never miss one. I was really looking forward to your new MMQB page and for the most part I have really enjoyed it. However lately I have not nearly enjoyed MMQB as much. I feel like I have been given a concussion by being beaten over the head with your concussion reports. Please go back to the reporting of fun football.

Yes, don't let reality infringe on the fun part of watching football. Ignore the negative, report the positive. Stick your head in the sand and ignore the problems. Brilliant, brilliant line of thought.

You don’t have to ignore concussions completely, but man I feel like you guys are trying to ruin something that I enjoy so very much.

It sounds like someone doesn't enjoy hearing about the physical problems his "fun" sport causes on the NFL players that makes the sport not-so-much fun after a player has retired.

It’s like if every time I eat something bad for me, my wife is standing behind me telling me that it’s going to kill me.”

 —Brock

Well maybe it will kill you and you shouldn't eat it then. Why do I have the feeling Brock weighs about 400 pounds or has had multiple heart attacks, but refuses to change his eating habits? Clearly, he wants to stay in denial until he needs help, in which case he obviously wants someone to help him so he can get back to having "fun."

I'm getting way off topic, but Brock either needs to read and learn from the MMQB reports about concussions or ignore them entirely if he doesn't like the reality of what these reports say to him.

“As a parent with a 9-year old and 14-year old playing football, and as a coach and huge football fan, I think the real problem here is all the negative publicity that is causing unnecessary concern and alarm. I do believe that efforts must continue to be made through better equipment, medical supervision and education. However the media needs to stop talking about it. Parents should be talking about it, players should be talking about it, coaches should be talking about it, medical professionals need to be talking about it but the media needs to leave it alone!! If that happens, both the safety and future of the game will be protected!’’
—Kris, Abbotsford, British Columbia

So the media needs to quit talking about concussions and let parents, coaches, medical professionals, and players talk about concussions using the information provided by...who? Generally, if the media doesn't disseminate information about a topic it's not that easy to be provided information on that topic. If I'm a parent who wants to get information on concussions to decide whether to allow my child to play football or not, should I just starting calling medical professionals or go to youth league games to talk to random parents about concussions? This just seems nonsensical to say, "Hey, we should be talking about concussions, but not the sports media. The sports media should ignore concussions."

Fine Fifteen

Yep, still in seemingly random order and still too reliant upon what happened just this past week. 

1. Kansas City (8-0). I debated putting the Chiefs here, after they struggled to beat Houston and Cleveland at home in the last eight days while others up top—the Niners in particular—have been strafing the league mercilessly.

But the Chiefs are undefeated. How can you pull an undefeated team from the top spot? Were the Chiefs impressive in not having lost any games just a week ago, but now they are unimpressive in winning games and that all of a sudden matters?

There are no style points in football, though, and the Chiefs are undefeated halfway through the season.

There are no style points?

3. San Francisco (6-2). Five straight wins by an average of 22.6 points. This team’s getting scary. 

Peter says there are no style points, yet he places the 49ers above three one-win teams and quotes by how many points the 49ers have won their last five games. There are no style points, unless there are style points.

4. Denver (7-1). Why San Francisco over the Broncos? Because I trust the Niners defense right now. I don’t trust Denver’s nearly as much.

Plus, style points. Of course Denver's only loss came to the team that is #2 in Peter's Fine Fifteen, while the 49ers have lost to the #2 and #5 teams in Peter's Fine Fifteen. But of course, there's no style points yet Peter puts the 49ers above a team that has one fewer loss and beat the 49ers head-to-head.

9. New England (6-2). So flawed. So hard to read. So hard to think this is an impact team in January—but the defense, even without Wilfork/Mayo/Talib, is a competitive group with players like Logan Ryan who don’t know they’re not supposed to be making game-deciding plays.

When a sportswriter lacks the ability to quantify why a team is playing well, he/she just writes crap like saying a team has players "who don't know they aren't supposed to be making game-deciding plays," as if this really means anything.

10. Detroit (5-3). One premier team with one premier quarterback (Green Bay, Aaron Rodgers) left in the final eight games—unless you count Baltimore, which, right now, you can’t call a premier team. That’s why I like the Lions’ chances to be the NFC North champ or the sixth seed in the NFC tournament.

See? The Lions win an exciting game against a 4-4 team and all of a sudden Peter King thinks the Lions could win the NFC North. I'm guessing if the Lions won another exciting game then Peter will have the Lions in the Super Bowl, as long as another new, shiny team doesn't win an exciting game during Week 9 of course.

11. Carolina (4-3). You can talk about the maturation and improvement of Cam Newton, which is good and true. But this is a pretty stingy team. Panthers have allowed 12 per game in the last five.

They have beaten the Giants, Vikings, Buccaneers, and Rams. What do they all have in common? They are all not very good teams. A 4-3 record against crappy opponents sure must be impressive to Peter for Carolina to be #11 in his "Fine Fifteen."

15. Houston (2-5).

Call me crazy as I rank the Texans over Arizona, Tennessee and Baltimore (which owns a 21-point win over Houston). I say Case Keenum and that defense constitute a playoff threat still … even though Indy (twice) and Denver (once) remain to be played.

Peter thinks the Texans are a playoff threat, but as the seventh best team in the AFC at this current time he doesn't think the Texans will actually make the playoffs of course. Also, I'm not calling him crazy, but merely saying Peter is probably overly-excited about the Texans winning more games so Peter can write about J.J. Watt more.

Special Teams Player of the Week

Josh Brown, kicker, New York Giants. Not a great fan of the field goal per se (see Stat of the Week), but in the first 55 minutes at Philadelphia, these were the only points: Brown, 40-yard field goal; Brown, 44-yard field goal; Brown, 33-yard field goal; Brown, 46-yard field goal; Brown, 27-yard field goal.

Only Peter King would name a kicker the special teams player of the week in the same MMQB where he essentially says that field goals are becoming too easy for kickers to make. I guess he believes field goals are too easy to make, but not too easy for a field goal kicker who makes five field goals to impress Peter.

Goat of the Week

Shaun Suisham, kicker, Pittsburgh. Kickers this season are making 94 percent of their kicks from inside the 40-yard line. Suisham missed 34- and 32-yard field goals, veritable extra points in today’s games. The Steelers lost by three. Pretty easy call.

Because field goals are so easy to convert and kickers never have a bad day.

“You have to understand the beast that’s playing quarterback. Once a guy like that gets in front of the whole defense, he’s a legit 4.4. It’s real.”

—Pittsburgh safety Ryan Clark, after Oakland quarterback Terrelle Pryor ran for the longest touchdown in Oakland franchise history, 93 yards, in a 21-18 Raiders victory Sunday.

So now the Raiders just have to figure out a way to get Terrelle Pryor in front of the whole opposing defense and the Raiders offense will be unstoppable.

At some point, the NFL’s going to have to acknowledge the efficiency of field-goal kickers is just too good. And the league is either going to have to narrow the goalposts or put a different point value on field goals from different distances.

Don't you hate it when NFL kickers become too good at their jobs? Once a player gets too good, it's time to move the goal posts (literally and figuratively it seems).

This easy, as the season nears the midpoint:

From inside the 40-yard line: 230 of 245, 93.9%. From between the 40- and 49-yard line: 126 of 153, 82.4%.

Do we want the game to be so boring, to lack any suspense, when a kicker steps up to make a field goal?

Maybe Graham Gano just sucks, but I don't really think a field goal is a given when a kicker steps back to attempt one. I guess the percentages say a field goal is a pretty good bet when a kicker lines up for one, but I still don't feel like it is a given personally.

I can tell you the founding fathers

Yeah, George Washington and Benjamin Franklin would be pissed about the current state of field goal kicking in the NFL.

of this game never dreamed the kickers would be so great that they would be good on 87 percent of their field goals through nearly half a season.

Oh nevermind, the founding fathers of "this game" not of "this country."

I would imagine the founding fathers of football also didn't dream of a forward pass and quarterbacks putting up 500 yards passing in a game. I'm not disagreeing with Peter, just saying any change to the vision of the founding fathers isn't necessarily a bad change for the game of football.

Then Peter King remarks at how young Marcus Mariota is and says he wouldn't be able to legally drink a beer if he won an NFL game next year. Peter previously provided data showing how young Mariota is compared to other 2014 draft-eligible quarterbacks.

Mr. Starwood Preferred Member Travel Note of the Week

The MMQB’s Robert Klemko had to fly from Chicago to Detroit Sunday morning to cover Lions-Cowboys, and he reported this to me when he landed:

Apparently there is an edict sent out by Peter King that all THE MMQB staff members must report annoying travel-related details to him immediately.

“I get on this plane from Chicago to Detroit, and these Japanese people, five of them, boarded the plane all carrying different stuffed animals. A teddy bear in an Army uniform, another teddy bear in a pilot uniform. I’d say they were in their late 20s, early 30s. One of them was a guy, and his bear was dressed in an American desert camo uniform.

“They were clutching these animals as if they were children. So I am sitting amidst them. The flight is taking off, and they’re not panicked or anything—but they’re whispering things in Japanese to the bears as if they were children. Then they just held them for the rest of the flight.

Wait, so these five Japanese people held on the teddy bears and whispered things in Japanese ALL WHILE MINDING THEIR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS? It doesn't get much worse than that. How can anyone be expected to stare at random strangers and micro-criticize their behavior when there is such an obvious distraction right there in front of his/her face? I'm sure there was a man on the plane who blatantly chose to watch the same television show on repeat for the entire flight and Robert Klemko didn't get to comment on this guy's behavior because these five Japanese people were minding their own business and doing something Klemko considers to be weird.

“I mean, they were holding them like they were breathing, like they were babies. Maybe they want kids and they are practicing for it. I don’t know. But there is something strange going on there.”

Perhaps THE MMQB should do a full investigation and report back in MMQB next week. I would imagine if these Japanese people wanted children they wouldn't have teddy bears as replacement children, but I know it merits a mention in MMQB as opposed to any sort of in-depth research on this topic that could be done online.

“I miss holding a baby – all my little guys are old.”
—@BarrySanders.

Yes, that Barry Sanders.

I guess Peter looked to find the most bland Tweet of the Week to include in MMQB. I would hope it is "that" Barry Sanders, because otherwise I could care even less that some random dude named Barry Sanders misses holding a child.

Ten Things I Think I Think

1. I think this is what I liked about Week 8:

d. Take those trade rumors and stuff ‘em, Josh Gordon says with his play every week.

Actually every week Josh Gordon probably says, "I'm a very good wide receiver and a contending NFL team should definitely trade for me immediately" with his excellent play.

f. Thad Lewis, who is very tough.

Thad Lewis is tough. This is #analysis.

g. Look at that lunging touchdown catch by Dexter McCluster. What a talent he is, and he’s being used perfectly as an everything back by Andy Reid.

Dexter McCluster has been targeted in the passing game 40 times over 8 games and has caught 23 passes. McCluster has 5 rushing attempts for 10 yards. If Peter King says McCluster is being used perfectly, meaning a little over six times per game, then that's not exactly a compliment to McCluster's ability.

Come on, Peter says "what a talent McCluster is" and then says he is being used perfectly. The guy barely catches 50% of the passes thrown to him and has 263 offensive yards on the year. If I'm being generous and including his punt and kickoff returns McCluster has 653 total yards and two touchdowns on the season. He's a good punt returner, but he's not exactly the offensive talent that Peter King seems to think he is.

h. Kevin Ogletree, who ran 70 yards to chase down Sean Lee on the Cowboys.

Or as Gregg Easterbrook will say, "the undrafted, unwanted hard-working Kevin Ogletree chased down the highly-drafted glory boy second-round pick Sean Lee."

2. I think this is what I didn’t like about Week 8:

d. Garrett Hartley, doinking a makeable field goal on the Saints’ first drive.

I guess from now on anytime a field goal kicker misses a field goal from 40 yards or less then Peter King will call that field goal "makeable" and criticize the kicker for missing it. Great, there's no way I could be less enthused about this new development.

e. The normally accurate Alex Smith, overthrowing a wide-open Anthony Fasano in the end zone, forcing Kansas City to settle for a field goal in the first quarter against Cleveland.

24th in the NFL in completion percentage. I guess that's "normally accurate."

a. Tom Brady, throwing behind Rob Gronkowski and getting picked by cornerback Dimitri Patterson (a very good Jeff Ireland offseason pickup), leading to Miami’s first touchdown. 

f. Geez, Tom Brady: It’s so bad you’re throwing to Rob Gronkowski in triple coverage? The good side: Officials gave the Patriots a gift defensive pass interference call on the play.

Peter King does not like it when Tom Brady passes the football to Rob Gronkowski.

j. Why, oh why, Chip Kelly, when you’re one score behind with four minutes to go, your defense playing well and three timeouts left do you onside kick?

Because fortune favors the bold! Because Chip Kelly was inspiring the Eagles to win by saying he was trying to win the game with an onside kick. You know Gregg Easterbrook is going to leave out Chip Kelly's bold move to go for an onside kick from his TMQ, even though Gregg has said a surprise onside kick is a good idea and plays like this tell a team the coach is playing to win the game. If Gregg does mention that Kelly went for an onside kick, I'm sure he'll suggest the kicker should have done a little dance before kicking the ball to throw the defense off.

6. I think for a fully healthy Peterson to have 36 carries in the last three weeks, with Minnesota struggling so much at quarterback, is absurd.

Yeah, but Josh Freeman and Christian Ponder need to be able to sling the ball around the field a little don't you know?

7. I think there are so many teams that could use Cleveland wideout Josh Gordon, so many receiver-needy contenders,

BREAKING NEWS: Many NFL teams could use a talented wide receiver on their roster.

I realize Gordon could be a positive substance test away from a lengthy suspension, but if I’m the Patriots, and I still have my full load of 2014 picks, I’d offer Cleveland a fourth-round pick that could conditionally upgrade to a third- depending on performance and try to get Gordon.

Josh Gordon is signed through 2014 and is very cheap. I'm sure the Browns would be more than willing to trade Josh Gordon for a 3rd/4th round draft pick. It's not like the Browns got a 1st round pick for Trent Richardson or anything, so I'm sure they would accept a lesser pick for a more talented player who is cheaper.

8. I think the Eagles have to be the disappointment of the season. The offense in particular.

I guess the Eagles are a disappointment depending on how much exactly was expected of them based entirely on Chip Kelly being the head coach.

A Chip Kelly team first and foremost has to have consistency and efficiency at quarterback, and Philadelphia hasn’t had that all season.

Nearly every NFL team needs consistency and efficiency at the quarterback position to succeed. The Eagles and Chip Kelly's offense aren't the only ones who need this.

10. I think these are my non-football thoughts of the week:

b. Memo to Darren Rovell (said with slight annoyance): The Riddell helmet/NFL divorce you wrote about, a story that was written by Jenny Vrentas of The MMQB on TheMMQB.com last Tuesday, was not written on SI.com, as you reported. It’s The MMQB.

Memo to Peter King (with a know-it-all attitude): This is what happens when you name your site THE MMQB and write a column called MMQB that used to appear on CNNSI.com. If you wanted to brand your new website in the best possible way, brand it to avoid confusion and not in a way that reminds the uninformed that there used to be a column posted on CNNSI.com that is called the exact same thing as your new website. Sure, I don't like Darren Rovell and he should have known this, but these are the things that happen when you confuse readers with the name of your new website that also happens to be the same name of a column you write for the new website that also appears on CNNSI.com.

c. Nothing against SI.com; I love SI.com. This column runs on SI.com at well as The MMQB. But the story was not written on SI.com.

And oh yeah, don't be upset when a person doesn't know exactly which site something posted on THE MMQB comes from when it is posted on CNNSI.com also. As I write this, the front page of CNNSI.com shows this very MMQB column and the link for THE MMQB has SI.com in the url. So, it's not hard to see where confusion can happen.

d. Thanks, Florence and the Machine, for “Shake It Out.” That’s my song of the week.

I'm sure they wrote the song just for you.

h. The obstruction call (he said through gritted teeth), though a stupid rule because umpires cannot use interpretation, was called correctly to end Game 3.

I know Red Sox fans will kill me for saying this, but even if the umpires could use interpretation I could see an argument that Middlebrooks meant to trip Allen Craig. If you watch the replay then you notice as he falls to the ground trying to catch the errant throw Middlebrooks' legs go up in the air. Then he lowers his legs and raises them again as Craig tries to run over him. Since Middlebrooks legs actually came back in the air after they were on the ground and just happened to be raised again as Allen Craig tried to run in the baseline, I could see where umpires could interpret intent to trip Allen Craig. Upon seeing the replay a few times, it seemed odd to me that Middlebrooks' legs went down on the ground and then happened to raise back up when Craig tried to run in the baseline over him.

j. Quote of the Series, from Jonny Gomes to Marc Topkin of the Tampa Bay Times, concerning the fact that he was only in the lineup Sunday night because Shane Victorino’s back tightened up and forced him to the bench, giving Gomes the chance to hit the game-winning three-run home run: “I had to ‘Tonya Harding’ Victorino.”

k. Google or Bing “Tonya Harding” if that one slips past you.

Sure, just as soon as you Google or Bing "Wally Pipp." 

n. Beernerdness: Also had the good fortune to be at Game 2 of the Series on Thursday, and was nearly as lucky to be back in my favorite old neighborhood restaurant Picco, in Boston’s South End. Very good beer menu. Tried the Star Island Single, a Belgian ale from Smuttynose in New Hampshire, and it was almost like a light ale. Okay, and eminently drinkable, but not memorable.

This wasn't a memorable beer, yet Peter remembers the name of the beer, who made the beer, what kind of beer it tasted like and also remembers enough of the taste to give a review on whether he liked the beer or not.

Who I Like Tonight
 
Seattle 33, St. Louis 10. Bet you thought I’d say, “Boston 4, St. Louis 3,” didn’t you?

Nope, I didn't.

I'm not including the Adieu Haiku, because it is a haiku and a bad joke. It's a reference to the "illegal bat" call in the Patriots-Dolphins game. Fine, here it is.

I have always thought
the home for illegal bats
was in the belfry.

I bet you feel dumber having read that.

13 comments MMQB Review: There's Matty Ices Everywhere!

Another exciting week of NFL football action has come and gone and now all we have to look forward to is the Monday Night Football Game between Houston and Tennessee. Do they even play in the NFL? I would be surprised if ESPN didn't put their "D" NFL team on this game consisting of Ron Franklin and Todd Blackledge. It doesn't even have a sexy East Coast team to be seen in the matchup. They may not even televise the game.

Monday Night Football games aside, Peter King is back again with his MMQB and it's an ode to "Matts." If your first name begins with Matt, Peter loves you (except Schaub). What do we learn today, does Peter think this Ricky Williams player could be a breakout player this year and more importantly, will Peter be able to get a full 2 questions for his Tuesday mailbag based on this column? We'll see I guess.

Talking with commissioner Roger Goodell, while he was getting his makeup wiped off in our NBC Football Night in America studio Sunday night after his Eagles-Bears halftime appearance ...

"You know how great you have it in the NFL this year?'' I asked. "Your TV ratings are totally through the roof, and here we are today, worst game of the year, Cleveland-Detroit, and it might be the best game of the year.''

That was an exciting game, no one can doubt that, but was it the "best game of the year?" Cleveland scored 37 points! Not the Cleveland Cavaliers, but the Cleveland Browns. Detroit scored 38 points. It had an exciting and a little bizarre finish but I don't know if I would call a game where there was little-to-no defense played between two very bad football teams as "the best game of the year." We all know I am about the little guy and Peter covering each team, but this game didn't strike me as football played at it's highest level for extended periods of time so there is no need to get overly excited about it. Of course that won't stop Peter. I am torn here, because I like it when Peter pays attention to other teams but I have to also acknowledge these are two bad teams who played each other.

Last week it was a 35-34 game between the Colts and Patriots that captured America.

As much as it would please me to argue this point, we did talk about this game A LOT. Maybe "captured America" is a bit dramatic and overdoing it. The game didn't exactly capture America, it was Bill Belichick's fourth down call that piqued the interest of America and the world (some parts of the world at least. England still doesn't give a shit).

We'll start there, then meander through the play Kansas City coach Todd Haley drew up in the dirt (slight exaggeration) to beat the World Champions.

Don't write it if it's an exaggeration. In journalism that is called a "slight lie."

Before Stafford and I started talking, I could hear the labored breathing and slight grunts -- I assume from Stafford -- as the harness went on his shoulder. X-rays were negative, but you could read his lips after he threw the winning touchdown and went to the sideline in intense pain. "It's out! It's out!'' he said, meaning his shoulder popped out of the socket.

If this were Brett Favre we would hear about this injury at the press conference after the game, in the interviews in the locker room, possibly through the week after the game, and of course he would tell Peter all about it.

"I don't know how I played today, my shoulder was out of socket. I'm not a hero, just a normal guy who played a game of football with his shoulder ripped out of socket because I love this game so much and couldn't let my teammates down. Is that microphone on? You are recording my heroic statement, right?"

Now I understand the wounded Lions fans. I hear from so many of you. The hopelessness, the anti-Matt Millenism, the surrender, the longing simply to be relevant again. And Goodell's right. This might have been something big right here. Not saying the Lions are on the road to contention. But they're mad as hell, and they're not going to take the losing anymore,

I hate to be a wet blanket, but they beat the Cleveland Browns...and gave up 37 points...at home...to the Cleveland Browns. The defense of the Lions gave up 37 points to the Browns and I am supposed to think this means the Lions have turned a corner because the game ended excitingly? Really the only statement this game makes is, "we are not as bad as the Cleveland Browns are."

And so that's why I choose this morning to write about the second win of the Detroit Lions at the top of the column, rather than the 10th victory for the Saints and the Colts.

Because you literally write about those two teams every single week? That would be the reason I would use to not cover these games extensively in MMQB on this date.

We all know the reason Peter wrote about the Cleveland-Detroit game this week is because, for some reason, this is the game he watched in it's entirety this weekend. That's what he does. He watches a game in it's entirety and then writes his column about that game and fills in the rest of the MMQB with highlights he was able to glean from some other games. If the game he didn't watch in it's entirety is the best game of the day, he calls and gets quotes from that game from the players and then writes about it. That's how Peter rolls.

The game came down to two plays. You've seen them, I'm sure. With eight seconds left and Cleveland up 37-31 (thanks to Brady Quinn's four touchdown passes)

I thought Brady Quinn should have been starting all year for the Browns, so I am a sort of Quinn fan...but he threw 4 touchdown passes in this game against the Lions defense and he has never shown this ability throughout his entire career before this game. This is not an indication the Lions are back on the right track.

Bang! Mosley drove Stafford as hard as a quarterback can be driven into the ground. The ball fluttered into the air, right into the arms of safety Brodney Pool.

Interception. Ballgame.

Flags.

So the very definition of "clutch," Matt Stafford, actually threw an interception that would have lost the game if it hadn't been for a lucky flag? Let's just ignore this and focus on his heroism. We did it for years with Favre.

"I was flat on my back on the sidelines, and the doctors were trying to figure out what was wrong with my shoulder,'' said Stafford. "But I heard, 'Timeout Cleveland,' and then I knew I could come back in.''

And the Lions got lucky when Mangini coached his team to a loss by calling a timeout letting Stafford back in the game. If these two plays don't scream "high quality football" then I don't know know what is wrong with you. We have porous defense, clutchly thrown interceptions, and piss poor coaching. It was like the Super Bowl, just not televised as widely.

Meanwhile, Schwartz hollered at his medical staff: "Is he good to go?'' And one of the doctors said no, and Schwartz asked what was wrong, and the doc said he didn't know because they hadn't had time to examine him yet.

"The kid put himself back in the game,'' Schwartz said.

Brilliant move by Schwartz to allow his franchise quarterback, who was injured but no one had an idea what was wrong with him, to just go back in the game. Brilliant.

Even the medical staff of Detroit is incompetent.

The Chiefs install their red-zone pass plays on Thursday mornings. Usually they're pulled out of the phone-book-thick playbook, plays that were taught in minicamps, practiced in training camp and used, most likely, a few times previously during the season. But last Thursday, Haley walked into the offensive team meeting and told his team he had something new to use against the Steelers down near the goal line -- a shovel pass to running back Jamaal Charles while the rest of the team was in max-protect mode.

This was the play Peter thought Todd Haley had drawn in the dirt. To Peter a shovel pass near the goal line is winging it. To the rest of the world this is an actual, smart football play, but to Peter this is crazy freelancing.

As Keith Olbermann said Sunday night, "Ryan Succop for the win, and oh, don't you look nice tonight, Mrs. Cleaver.''

This statement is not funny, not witty, not clever...I don't care about Keith Olbermann's politics or anything else about him. He is a smug asshole and if he truly ceased to be on this earth (maybe be shot into space or something) then I would feel slightly better knowing there is one less smug, self impressed douchebag alive.

Football and war really do have something in common, other than the cliches.

No they don't.

Good story by Jay Glazer on FOX's pregame show about how independent neurologists will soon be employed at all NFL games, so that a team physician paid by a franchise won't have a conflict of interest about whether to allow an injured player back in the game.

How interesting considering Peter King was just lauding Matt Stafford for coming back in the game before the trainers had a chance to check him for his injury and now he is lecturing on the importance of proper safety in the NFL. Gregg Easterbrook is right about this part. Football guys lecture us on how important football safety is and then praise individuals who come back from injury quickly and ignore any health concerns there may be.

He said he thinks organized offseason conditioning has spiraled out of control. (And bully for him on this -- it's ridiculous how year-round a job playing and coaching has become.) "I'm a firm believer that players are overworked in the offseason,'' Goodell said. "They probably need to get away from the game a little bit more. And when they're away, they probably work harder.

I wonder why Peter is all for this? Probably because it means he will have some more time off during the summer. Lazy...

But what makes Minnesota dangerous is that Brett Favre's playing like he played in his three-year MVP run a decade and a half ago. In fact, my Twitter followers are appealing for me to have Favre pass Peyton Manning in my MVP Watch below, and if he keeps this up, I'm going to have a very tough decision at the end of the year.

I really, really, really doubt Peter King's Twitter followers are begging for him to have Brett Favre pass Peyton Manning in the MVP Watch. There are probably 9 Vikings fans who want this to happen. This is beyond absurd. Brett Favre has the best running back in the NFL AND one of the best defenses in the NFL on his side, while Peyton Manning IS the Colts. The Vikings won their division and made the playoffs without Favre last year, sure he has added value to the team, but there is no way based on that information anyone can truly believe Favre is more valuable than Peyton Manning. What are the Colts without Manning, 2-8 right now?

Watching Favre through 10 weeks, I'm starting to think he's going to make it through 16 games, and more. His groin strain doesn't seem to be bothering him.

Yes, Peter King just extended his streak of talking about Brett Favre in every MMQB since last December (that's how far back I chose to go). The reason Favre's groin strain doesn't bother him is because it likely doesn't exist. It's hard to be affected by an injury that doesn't exist or at least isn't as severe as Favre likes to play up.

Clearly, it's helped Favre to have the best offensive supporting cast he's ever had. The line keeps him clean, he has the best all-around back in football, Adrian Peterson, behind him, and he has three deep threats (Percy Harvin, Sidney Rice and Bernard Berrian), the kind of depth at receiver he didn't have with the Packers or Jets.

So because Favre has a better supporting cast he should be the MVP? This doesn't make sense. Peter has spent this entire NFL season telling everyone and anyone who will listen how Peyton Manning is doing such a great job with the nobodies on his offense and now he wants to just forget that and give the MVP to Favre while acknowledging the supporting cast around Favre. It's madness.

Aaron Rodgers is cleaning up his act in the pocket.

First eight games: 37 sacks, five interceptions. Last two games: six sacks, no interceptions. There's no question Rodgers was simply holding onto the ball too long, and his leaky offensive line -- particularly at right tackle -- was getting him bowled over.

I like how even thought there are other variables as to why Aaron Rodgers was getting sacked, like the types of routes being run by his receivers, his offensive line's play, and yes, Rodgers holding onto the ball too long, Peter chooses to focus completely on the "holding onto the ball too long" as to why Rodgers is getting sacked so much. It's interesting Peter doesn't say the offensive line isn't giving Rodgers enough time, he says Rodgers is holding onto the ball too long and the offensive line is not protecting him because of this...he just slightly puts more of the blame on Rodgers instead of the offensive line.

A couple of times last year, when he was most frustrated, Vince Young would text Kobe Bryant, who had become something of a mentor. He'd write something like, "Man, I wanna play so bad. What do I do?''

Don't tell people you hate football and act like you want to kill yourself. You could also try to get traded and then pretend you are cool with your teammates when you are forced to play with them because the team wouldn't trade you." That would be Kobe Bryant's advice.

Those demands came to a head early last season, when his worried mother reached out for help after seeing Young leave his house with a gun.

"That was blown out of proportion,'' said Young. "My mom never saw me with a pistol before, and when she did, she got nervous. I have a pistol for protection. I was never gonna harm myself, but she got nervous.''

So his mom saw him with a gun and just automatically assumed he was going to kill himself? Isn't that a HUGE leap in logic? Isn't there maybe 10 other scenarios a mother might think about first before going to "he is going to kill himself," unless that mother had a preconceived notion for one reason or another her child would actually try to kill himself? How the hell can anyone actually believe this reason? I have seen tons of people with guns in my life and I have never thought one of them was going to kill himself because I knew they weren't potentially suicidal. Now if I thought someone carrying was a gun was potentially suicidal I may think differently...so maybe this situation wasn't blown out of proportion.

Of course Peter King buys this reason. He is either not smart enough to question it or wants to be friends with Vince Young so he intentionally believes his bullshit.

I lied. One really final note from 35-34, unless I find something else that deserves to be in here.

First Peter calls it "The Call" and now he is just giving us the score of the game. I know the media is trying hard to create super duper special memories for all of us and to make this Patriots-Colts game into an absolute classic, but let's just take a break from trying so hard. It was a good game, every Colts-Patriots game doesn't have to be a classic.

The Fine Fifteen

1. New Orleans (10-0). Don't look now, but Drew Brees has a new weapon who's pretty good -- wideout Robert Meachem,

He's not new. He is an underachieving first round pick. I think I would look good playing wide receiver with Brees as the quarterback.

Quote of the Week I

"Gutsy game by the kid.''
-- Text message from Detroit coach Jim Schwartz to me an hour after Matthew Stafford, being treated for a mangled left shoulder, broke away from team medics and made an unauthorized entry into the Lions-Browns game for the final play, completing the winning touchdown pass for a 38-37 win.

Wasn't it just earlier in this exact same MMQB Peter King did a couple paragraphs about how Roger Goodell is getting a study together with the Army to see how long it takes football players and soldiers to get back on the field after an injury...and Peter indicated this was a good thing? It's a little bit hypocritical to write about that and favor it and then make Matt Stafford who had an injury with unknown severity a hero for going right back on the field? Not to mention he is the franchise quarterback. It's heroic in a football sense, but also pretty damn risky.

Quote of the Week III

"There are New England football fans who'd support Belichick if he pledged to eradicate indoor plumbing.''
-- Boston Globe columnist Dan Shaughnessy, on the local loyalty Bill Belichick inspires.

Thank God Peter and Dan Shaughnessy are here to tell me how much New England likes Bill Belichick. I tend to forget if I am not reminded every single day what a great coach and inspiring leader he is. Fortunately, they are here with blanket coverage of this.

Isn't there a curse or something else Dan Shaughnessy has to go cover? Doesn't it say a lot about Peter King that he said he moved to Boston partly to read Dan Shaughnessy?

MVP Watch

2. Brett Favre, QB, Minnesota. We might be watching the most amazing year of his ridiculous career.

Brett Favre is great. We all get this. He also plays for a team that was very good last year and would have been very good with or without him this year. While Peter is so damn focused on the awesomeness of Brett Favre, I wish he would also focus on the awesomeness of the team around Brett Favre...and more importantly, how much Adrian Peterson helps Favre.

Enjoyable/Aggravating Travel Note of the Week

I Weep For Humanity Dept.: The NBC Football Night in America crew took in the Panthers-Rangers game Saturday night at Madison Square Garden. Entering the building, I saw eight 18ish Ranger-clad guys and gals posing for a photo, with what I assumed was a passerby who agreed to take their photo. All posed with middle fingers pointing at the camera.

Oh the horror! If I saw Peter King and the NBC Football Night in America crew enter any building I would probably start flipping everyone off too.

Peter had some sort of contest that allowed one of his Twitter followers to write about any topic of choice and Peter would publish it. A guy named Tim wrote several paragraphs on why he prefers to watch a game on television rather than go to a game. I can explain why in a sentence.

Everything is too expensive, parking is a hassle, it takes up nearly your entire day, you can say whatever you want to at the television in frustration at home and don't have to worry about a kid hearing you (unless it is your kid), you have to brave the elements (whatever they may be) and you really can't see everything that happens at a football game.

f. I don't care what the Bears say. If they keep going down the drain and Jay Cutler's mentor is on the unemployment line, they have to look at Shanahan.

Yes, because those two had so much success together in Denver, they need to try and put another .500 team together in Chicago.

3. I think Eagles defensive end Trent Cole is one of the 10 most underappreciated players in the NFL. That's what you call a guy who's had sacks in eight of Philly's 10 games, yet won't get a sniff for the Pro Bowl.

I don't think Trent Cole could ever be as unappreciated as Antonio Gates is though. Whatever happened to Antonio Gates and why don't we talk about him more?

c. Who'd have ever thought Julian Edelman would be this kind of receiver? Looks like he's been catching passes for seven years, not seven months.

I thought he could be this kind of receiver because Bill Belichick fucking drafted him and that means he is going to be in the Pro Bowl forever. Peter has a firm grasp on the New England Patriots depth chart and has mentioned Edelman several times this year but last week he couldn't seem to remember why we don't talk about Antonio Gates more, yet he knows all about Julian Edelman. I find this interesting.

Also, Edelman was a quarterback in college, it's not like he had never seen or caught a football prior to this year. He's making a good transition to receiver but let's temper this excitement a little can we?

d. The Saints made up quite nicely for their injured cornerbacks -- Tracy Porter and Jabari Greer -- in Tampa Bay, holding Josh Freeman to 126 yards passing and picking him off three times. Good job by Randall Gay.

Great job stopping that rookie quarterback New Orleans. It's always hard to stop rookie quarterbacks and you certainly wouldn't expect a team that was undefeated to be able to do this.
e. The Broncos are cooked. Kaput. Never has a defense seemed like such a mirage as the D of the first six Denver games.

But I thought Josh McDaniels was a genius and the Broncos were going to be good this year? Isn't that what I was told in MMQB at the beginning of the year? Bill Simmons isn't bragging so loudly about his underdog Denver Broncos pick now is he? It's funny how he bragged about that for the first couple weeks when the Broncos were winning but now he is strangely silent on the issue.

7. I think you have to sit Mark Sanchez, Rex Ryan. The game's overwhelming for him right now. His last pick Sunday in Foxboro was just plain stupid, if not panicky. Time for Kellen Clemens.

I find it hilarious the two biggest storylines of the early part of the NFL season, Mark Sanchez and Denver's rise, are now completely over and both the player and the team have gone back to the level we expected. Should the media, and Peter King, feel stupid about saying all the wonderful and hyperbolic things about Sanchez and the Broncos? Probably, but that doesn't mean next year they won't overreact to a rookie quarterback's first couple of successful games and think another team will win the Super Bowl after starting the year off by winning a few games.

Never underestimate the media's ability to hype up a situation and then quietly never mention they were wrong in hyping up the situation when it all goes to hell.

How interesting would it have been if Dungy coached with Parcells and Belichick? Would they have become smitten with his coaching ability? Would he have joined Belichick's staff in Cleveland, or gone on the long and winding trail through the '90s with Parcells, or stayed in New York and impressed George Young and Wellington Mara enough to succeed Ray Handley after that debacle? Instead, he ended up in staredowns with Belichick for seven years in the best rivalry in the league. I love these what-if games.

I hate what-if games.

c. You call that a lot of Funkhauser? Come on, Larry David. When I say I want Funkhauser, I mean not just three or four lines.

I wonder if Peter King knows they shot this episode months ago or that Larry David doesn't really look to him for comedic ideas? Probably not.

f. Until Saturday, I'd never heard of Oregon quarterback Jeremiah Masoli. But I have a feeling I'll be typing his name an awful lot in the coming year. What a football game that was in Tucson. Three touchdowns running by Masoli, three passing. What a cool cucumber.

Who says Peter King has an East Coast bias? Just because he hadn't heard of the quarterback for the #8 team in the nation, and the only team on the West Coast in the Top 15 doesn't mean he has an East Coast bias. (End of sarcasm)

We don't need Peter King's opinion of Jeremiah Masoli. It's not like my life is incomplete without Peter King chiming in on what he thinks about Masoli. As his habit, Peter is a few months late in recognizing the skill of Masoli and then he makes a proclamation about what a great player he is. We know already.

It was really awesome to see the Arizona fans line up to rush the field and then the team lost. What a stupid thing to do for those fans. It's not like Arizona had the game in hand and Oregon pulled out a miracle, Oregon was driving down the field, had timeouts left and still those dumbasses climbed over barriers and got ready to rush the field. It was the definition of premature. The second I saw the Arizona fans start to crowd the field I wanted Oregon to win the game...though preferably by more than 6 points.

j. Sunday night, 10:47, walking back from NBC to my midtown hotel. Phone rings. It's Brian Hyland, my former compadre on HBO's Inside the NFL. He's at the final Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band concert of this tour (forever, perhaps?) in Buffalo, and he's now considerate enough to call me as "Tenth Avenue Freezeout'' begins, and he keeps the phone on for the first eight minutes of the song. Thanks, Brian. Not the best sound quality, but I'm a beggar, and I'm not choosy.

This is pathetic. I can see maybe listening to a few seconds of the concert and then telling his good friend Brian to have a good night and go about his life, but to listen to 8 minutes of a song through a cell phone...it's not like Peter had never been to a Springsteen concert before either. This is a bit of overkill in my mind.

If Peter had to choose between talking to Brett Favre on the phone for 8 minutes or hearing 8 minutes of a Bruce Springsteen song, I wonder which one he would choose?

Well, I think Peter got 2-3 good mail bag questions out of this MMQB.